Starting Over
by TinkBuck
Summary: PreLost. Jack tries to help a 17 year old Kate to straighten out her messed up life. Please R&R.
1. Responsibility

This is my first fan fiction ever. And just so you know English isn't my native language so its not the best, sorry.

Lost is obviously not my creation. Don't sue.

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**Chapter One - **Responsibility

Jack was feeling stressed out. There was so much left to do before Friday. He hadn't even started packing properly. He still couldn't believe he had gotten in to medical school. He knew his parents were proud of him, for once. He wasn't too fond of the idea of moving to New York though. He would miss all of his friends and his parents, but most of all he would miss Kate.

Walking around in his room his eyes fell on a framed photograph of the two of them. He smiled at the picture in his hand making a mental note to place it somewhere clearly visible in the new apartment.

Kate had been very withdrawn the last couple of months. Jack wondered if maybe had something to do with the fact that he was moving away.

Jack found himself standing in front of the bathroom mirror. Maybe there was something else wrong with Kate. It worried him that she was shutting everybody out. Most of all it worried him that she was shutting him out.

Stepping out of his clothes, Jack took a long needed shower to cleanse his head. After drying himself carelessly, he put on his PJ pants and left the bathroom.

He walked out to the kitchen and opened the fridge. Nothing. He sighted loudly and glanced over at the money on the kitchen island his parents had left him for pizza. They had been gone since yesterday morning. Jack checked his watch. 5'oclock, they should be back in a couple of hours.

He could hear the rain pouring down outside. His parents had probably had an awful time on the boat trip in all this rain.

The sound of the doorbell echoed through the house and he shut the fridge with his foot. He ran his hand threw his hair as he opened the front door.

"_Kate?"_ She was inspecting her shoes, not wanting to meet his eyes. Jack knew that she was crying though, without actually seeing her face and he took a small step forward and gathered her in his arms.

"_Hey, that's wrong?"_

With the support of Jacks warm arms around her soaked and cold body Kate broke down completely. Noticing that the small figure in his arms was trembling uncontrollably Jack guided her in to the living room and sat her down on the couch. After placing a blanket over her shoulders he sat down next to her and embraced her again.

"_What happened Kate? Please tell me what's wrong…"_ It killed him to see her like this, not being able to do anything.

He could feel her burying her face in his shoulder and sobbing wildly. She rarely expressed any feelings like this, thinking about it Jack couldn't think of a single time he had seen her cry like this.

Jack tried desperately to calm the young girl down, whispering soothing things in her ear. Finally Kate started to calm down. She rested her head against his chest and listened to his heartbeats.

Jack shifted slightly on the couch and moved her face with his right hand so that he could see her. His eyes were begging her to explain that had happened. Kate closed her eyes and bit her bottom lip. Something she only did when she was nervous or scared.

"_It's okay. Just tell me. Everything will be alright, I promise."_ Kate opened her eyes again and shyly looked back up at the only on she had ever really trusted.

"_Tom and I broke up." _

"_Oh Kate I'm sorry"_ He wasn't really that sorry. Tom was a great guy, but he knew that Kate hadn't been that happy with him, especially not the last couple of months. They had been fighting a lot and Kate had been shutting him out completely, _"what happened?"_ he asked mostly out of politeness, he didn't really care what the reason was.

"_I told him I was pregnant"_ her voice was shaky and her eyes unfocused.

Jack's whole world froze to ice the same second the words had left her mouth. Suddenly he cared hell of a lot about the reason for the break up. Kate was pregnant? He could feel the disgust growing inside of him. She had slept with Tom? He felt like yelling at her, he wasn't even sure why. Kate had been going out with Tom for a year. Considering the facts it wasn't that big of a surprise that they had had sex.

Remembering that Kate was still sitting next to him he focused his eyes on her and noticed that she was studying her hands lying in her lap. Jack reached over and put his hand on top of hers. _"Kate…"_ She didn't look up. _"Kate…"_ he tried again. She reluctantly moved her face towards him so that Jack could see the tears running down her cheeks.

"_Come here"_ He hugged her closely afraid that she would break down again. He stroked her hair with one hand, the other one rested on her back.

Kate tried to hold back another sob. _"I was at the clinic earlier and had some allergy tests taken"_ Her grip around Jacks waist tightened. _"And well I guess they saw on my blood results that I was pregnant." _She trailed off.

Jack nodded slightly not sure what to say next. He still couldn't believe that she was pregnant. Kate was pregnant. He didn't dare to think how her parents were going to react. Her mother would be so disappointed. He wondered how Tom had reacted. It couldn't have been pretty since they had broken up. Jack never thought Tom would just leave her like this though. It wasn't like him at all. _"What did Tom say?"_

"_He said that we would figure it out and that we should get married"_ she almost chuckled.

Now that sounded a lot more like the Tom he knew.

"_I couldn't let him do that. Just throw his life away. It's not his responsibility"_

Jack moved his hands to each side of her shoulders and lowered his head so that he was looking directly at her. _"Kate I don't want to sound judgmental or anything, but you're just seventeen. If Tom got you pregnant it is his responsibility. It's not more than right that he marries you and promises to be there for you and the baby. And if he doesn't, I will personally kick his ass."_ He realized he had raised his voice and that he sounded very big brotherly, but he couldn't help it.

"_He didn't…"_ Kate looked devastated, not even bothering to wipe away the tears from her cheeks. Jack reached over to her and stroked them away with his thumb._ "He didn't what?" _

Kate brought her hands up and covered her face as she started to cry again. _"He didn't!"_ Her sobbing got worse and she practically threw herself at Jack, arms around his neck, burying her face in his chest.

He's slowly wrapped his arms around her once more and rested his head on top of hers. Kate mumbled something against him, but Jack couldn't make out the words. He moved his hands to her sides and pushed her slightly away so that he could see her. _"What?"_ He's voice was full of concern and love.

"_He didn't get me pregnant"_ It was barely a whisper.

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Well I am in serious need of guidance... Is it worth continuing this? 


	2. Anxiety

Thank you all so much for the reviews :)

Here is a new chapter...

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**Chapter Two** - Anxiety

He studied her face, as if the answer was there. _"What? I don't understand…" _He sounded totally lost.

"_At the clinic they said I was approximately 4 weeks along…"_ She looked down, not being able to meet his eyes. _"Tom and I we haven't… you know… not that recently."_ she trailed off.

She was breathing rapidly and Jack could feel her shaking under his hands. _"I should be 10 weeks pregnant."_ Her voice was begging, as if the situation would change if she wished for it. Her eyes shut close and she lowered her head.

"_Tom's not the father."_ It wasn't a question, he just needed to state it, trying to get a grip of the situation.

Kate shook he head as if she was defeated by some greater power.

Jack's head was spinning. A feeling of delusion hit him and he was no longer sure he was awake. Maybe he was dreaming? Kate had cheated on Tom with some other guy and now she had ended up pregnant? No. That was defiantly not what had happened. Jack was sure of it.

He brought his hand to her chin and turned her head back towards his. _"Do you know who the father is?" _

Her eyes flashed of anger and she rapidly turned her face away from his.

"_Kate, I didn't mean it like that…"_ His voice sounded apologizing. Way to go Jack. You just implied that she slept around so much that she wouldn't even know who the father is if she had them lined up in a row.

"_Kate…"_ He tried again, moving her face back towards his once more. Kate's face told him that she knew he wasn't being judgmental. But her eyes wouldn't meet his, she just looking straight ahead at nothing in particular. She shook her head slightly. _"No, it doesn't matter…"_ Her sobbing was back.

"_But you do know, don't you?" _

Kate continued to sob, making it hard for her to talk properly. _"It makes no difference, it doesn't matter"_

"_Kate it does matter, you need to tell me…"_ his voice was full of concern.

What had happened a month ago? Jack was trying to remember. Kate's mom had been in South Dakota visiting her sister. Kate had spent most of her time with Jack, since she had been fighting with Tom. It was the week when they had rented a lot of movies and Kate had fallen asleep in his arms on the same couch they were sitting on right now. Jack almost smiled at the memory. Then Wayne had grounded Kate for a whole week, since she hadn't come home until the next morning.

Looking down at the brunette in his arms, he knew what had happened. _"Kate, if Wayne…"_ Her eyes met his instantly. He knew he had found the last piece of this messed up puzzle.

Jack immediately wished he hadn't. Why couldn't his suspicions been wrong. Jack closed his eyes, feeling nauseous. He knew Wayne had slapped her a few times and that he often verbally abused her, but this… Jack felt the urge to kill him, slowly, making him suffer.

"_You need to tell the police Kate"_

Kate's body started to shake uncontrollably. _"No I can't. No."_

He pulled her closer. _"Kate... You have to tell the police… and your mom."_ He was running his hands up and down her back desperately trying to calm her down. He noticing that her clothes were still soaked from the rain outside and that she was ice cold.

"_No."_ she said firmly. _"Mom never believed me, why would she now? She has seen him beat me everyday, and she never did anything to prevent it."_ Her sobbing made it difficult for her to continue. Wayne had beaten her everyday? Jack couldn't even stand the idea of anyone hurting Kate. Why hadn't she told him?

Jack whispered soothing words in her ear and stroked her hazel brown hair with one of his hands, trying to give her strength to carry on. _"She always protected him. Why would it be any different now?"_ Kate was crying hysterically again, breathing more and more rapidly.

"_Kate you need to calm down…"_ Jack wasn't sure what to do. She had never been like this before. He didn't know how to calm her down. He felt completely powerless.

"_Your mother loves you Kate, you know that. It will be different this time, I promise you."_

"_No she doesn't, she hates me! She threw me out after we left the clinic, telling me I was no longer her daughter and that she never wanted to see me again."_

Jack didn't say thing, he just held her, gently stroking her hair with his hand. He could feel that her tensed body finally started to relax against him. Jack wasn't sure how long they had been sitting there, but he noticed her breathing had slowed down and he guessed that she had fallen asleep.

Trying to move away from her embrace, placing her down on the couch, Jack noticed her body shivering. Changing his mind, he scooped her up in his arms and carried her carefully to his room. He placed her on his bed and went to his drawer and got a large white t-shirt. He glanced back at her sleeping figure on his bed and considered the pros and cons of changing her clothes.

This was ridiculous, there was no way he could let her sleep in those clothes. He walked over to the bed and gently sat her up against him. _"Kate, you need to get out of these clothes…"_ he said quietly. She stirred a little and placed one of her hands on his chest for support.

Jack carefully slipped his hands under her shirt on her back and pulled it up over her head. Jack tossed her olive green shirt on a chair on the other end of the room. Noticing several huge bruises on her back Jack shut his eyes to prevent the tears from rolling down his face.

Tracing the bruises gently with his fingertips he felt like he was doing something forbidden, and considered to just let her sleep as she was. So she might get a cold, that wouldn't be the end of the world, right? Having her wake up and freaking out while he was undressing her on the other hand, that would be the end of the world.

Kate's body shivered again. Maybe it was caused by his touch but more likely was it the work of the wet clothes that had been glued to her body for God knows how long. Taking a deep breath, Jack pulled the white t-shirt over her head and carefully laid her down on her back.

He removed her sneakers and placed them next to the bed and glance down at her jeans. With another deep breath Jack started to unbutton them slowly. She stirred and tried to move away from him on the bed. Not wanted to keep her still against her will he stroke his hand down her cheek softly _"Kate… wake up"_ She stirred again and opened her eyes tiredly. _"I need to get you out of these jeans. You'll get sick if you sleep in them."_ He explained. Kate nodded lazily and closed her eyes again.

Jack continued to unbutton her jeans and tried to pull the wet fabric off her body, unsuccessfully. Kate's eyes rapidly opened and she looked around terrified, trying to get up. Jack moved so that he was sitting next to her and embraced her. Kate didn't move, she didn't wrap her arms around him as she usually did. Jack noticed and pulled back slightly to look at her. She bottom lip was trembling and her eyes told him that she was scared. Jack's heart broke. She was scared of him. Feeling like he was choking, Jack gave her an apologizing look, hoping it would calm her down. _"I'm sorry"_ he's voice was full of love and concern. Kate looked around the room once more taking in her surroundings, her gaze settled on the bed they were sitting on.

"_You fell asleep in the living room…"_ Jack explained.

Kate made an _"Oh"_ sound and looked back up at Jack giving him a weak smile. Jack smiled back, thankful that she had calmed down.

"_You need to get out of those pants"_ he said nodding towards her jeans. Kate let her head drop and looked down at her legs._ "They're soaked, you'll get sick if you sleep in them" _he explained.

Kate lay back down on the bed and pulled the jeans down from her waist as Jack pulled at them slightly down at her feet. Getting them off, he tossed them over to the chair as well but missed and the pants ended up on the floor. He gave out a sight but didn't make any movement to walk over and pick them up.

He glanced over at Kate who was lying curled up in a ball without a cover in the middle of his bed. He smiled and placed the cover over her and sat down on the side of the bed watching her. He leaned forward and stroked a string of her dark hair behind her ear. Leaning down even further he whispered _"Everything will be okay Kate, I promise"_

Kate opened her eyes and looked at him. He smiled down at her and caressed her arm soothingly. _"Don't leave me Jack… Please"_ she begged, as if her life depended on it.

Jack had never seen her look so vulnerable. He gave her a reassuring smile. _"I'm not going anywhere" _

Tears started to stream down her face. _"Yes you are."_ Her voice was barely a whisper, and if he hadn't seen her lips move the words could have been in his imagination.

He understood that she didn't mean tonight. She was talking about New York, and she was right, he was leaving her. He could feel that her body started to tremble again and he lay down next to her and wrapped his arms around her.

"_Please don't go Jack. Please don't leave me here alone. I can't deal with all of this… I just can't"_ She was crying again, clinging herself to him.

"_Hush, It's ok" _he tried to soothe her down. _"It's not the other side of the world Kate. If you need me, you can just call and I can be here in a few hours."_

Kate shook her head. _"No, it wouldn't be the same…"_

Jack cuddled her closer. _"Kate I can't. If I'm not there on Monday I will lose my spot. I'm sorry but I might never get a chance like this again."_ He hated that he had to leave. But he couldn't just throw his whole future away, could he? No that was insane. He loved her and would do anything for her, but in the end Kate wasn't his responsibility. Kate was just his friend.

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I would really appreciate if you reviewed so that I know if you still like it. 


	3. Reassurance

Thank you for the reviews, glad to know you like it. I'm not one hundred precent sure where I'm going with the story yet. Had a pretty dark idea to begin with but I don't feel like writinga sad - depressing story anymore. Suggestions are always welcomed. ;)

Here is another chapter...

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**Chapter Three - Reassurance**

Jack woke up by the front door slamming shut. He opened his eyes and saw hazel brown hair covering most parts of the pillow. He smiled to himself and took in the wonderful smell of Kate's hair. Hearing his parents voices Jack slipped out of the bed carefully not to wake up Kate.

Walking in to the kitchen he forced a lazy smile to his parents, Christian and Margo. _"You're back already?"_

Jack's mother gave him an odd look. _"It's 9 o'clock."_

"_Oh"_ Jack glanced at the clock on the wall, 9:05 pm. He'd been sleeping for about 3 hours.

"_You okay kid?"_ He's dad asked.

Jack gave him a small nod.

"_Did you go to bed already?"_ Jack looked over at his mother who was eyeing him suspiciously.

He realized for the first time that he was just wearing the bottom part of his pajamas._ "Uh Yeah"_ He answered unfocused.

He parents exchanged a look and then looked back at him questionably.

Jack cleared his throat _"Kate's here…"_ He wasn't planning on sneaking her out in the morning so he could just tell time right away that she was there. Knowing it would cause a lot more problem if they walked in and found her in his bed the next morning.

"Kate's here?" his mother asked as she looked around the room, her eyes finally settling on the couch.

Jack glanced over and noticed what it might look like. The pillows were all in a mess and the blanket Kate had worn over her shoulders was on the floor, next to a t-shirt he had tossed there earlier that morning.

"_Um Yeah, Kate was upset, she had a fight with her parents."_ Jack tried to explain, he didn't like lying to them so he told them something that was true, he just left out the pregnant part.

"_Aha"_ His mother didn't sound very convinced.

"_Jack…"_ the voice was soft but alarmed. Jack turned around and saw Kate standing in the opening to the hallway, tugging on the white t-shirt she was wearing.

"_Hey"_ He walked over to her and put an arm around her waist. She was nibbling on her bottom lip. _"You just left…"_ she sounded like a little girl who had lost her favorite toy. _"I'm sorry, I'm right here" _He reassured.

He glanced up at his parents without letting go of Kate and was met by confused looks. "_We're going back to bed"_ he said simply to his parents and started to guide Kate back towards his room._ "Jack get back here I want to talk to you!"_ His mother demanded.

He didn't have the energy to deal with either one of his parents right now. Plus he didn't want to leave Kate alone in his room. _"We'll talk in the morning"_ He shouted back and shut his door closed.

Kate looked up at him with a nervous expression on her face. _"It's alright, don't worry about them." Jack told her._

Kate nodded slowly and let out a yawn. Jack smiled at her sweetly. _"Tired?"_ she nodded again smiling back at him.

Taking her hand, Jack led her to the bed and sat her down. Her eyes shifted between nervousness and apprehension. _"If you want I can sleep in the guestroom"_ he offered. She shook her head, he already knew she would, he just wanted her to know she had the option. She took hold of his hand and pulled him down with her so that he was nearly lying on top of her. _"Getting a little frisky, are ya?"_ he asked playfully as he started to tickle her.

"_Jack!"_ she screamed out load in surprise. Jack quickly put his hand over her mouth. _"Kate… hush"_ He glared over towards his door. She started to giggle against his hand, whispering _"Sorry"._ Moving his hand away from her mouth he let it trace her jaw line up to her cheek and in to her hair. Kate smiled and she moved slightly under him. Realizing that she was pinned down by his body her expression grew serious.

Jack realized it too but didn't move. _"Its okay"_ he reassured her. He knew he would move the second she asked him, he didn't want her to be scared of him. But he needed to reassure her that she could trust him. _"Just relax, trust me, okay?" _Her face was only an inch away from his. How had they gotten so close? Jack wasn't sure… He could feel her breath on his lips and he felt a sudden urge to kiss her. That would definitely screw things up, don't under any circumstances do that, his mind screamed.

"_I do trust you."_ Jack tore his eyes away from her lips, he could tell that she was holding her breath. He leaned down and softly kissed her on the cheek, Kate inhaled rapidly as his lips came in contact with her soft skin. He smiled as he noticed that Kate had closed her eyes.

Jack moved a little so that he law on his side facing her, and was no longer keeping her down on the bed. Kate opened her eyes and tilted her head towards him.

Letting his fingertips trace down the side of her arm, he felt her shiver under his touch. As Jack finally settled his hand on her stomach, he noticed that Kate took a deep breath.

"_What am I gonna do Jack?"_ She sounded scared and alone. It broke his heart. Worst of all was that he had no idea what to suggest, no idea how to help her.

Giving her a clueless smile, he shook his head gently. _"I don't know"_

Wow lots of support you are Jack, he thought to himself. He wanted to kick himself mentally for not being able to tell her what to do or how to fix this. Studying her face Jack could see that she had really needed that guidance right now, the guidance he couldn't give her.

His eyes traveled down to his hand, still resting on her perfectly flat stomach. He still couldn't believe that there was a tiny baby growing in there. Kate's baby. He smiled. He was absolutely sure that her baby would be the most beautiful little child in the whole world. Assumingly that she would keep the baby. That thought hadn't hit him before. Did Kate even want this baby? Was she planning on giving the baby up for adoption? Or was she even planning on going through with the pregnancy, there was still time to have an abortion.

Jack snapped out of his thoughts when he felt Kate placing her hand on top of his. He smiled at her and she returned the smile sweetly.

"_We'll figure it out…"_ he knew he didn't sound very convincing, but it was the best he could do. He would figure it out, he had to.

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Let me know if you still like it... if you do I'll write another chappy tonight :) 


	4. Losing Control

Thank you for all the nice reviews. Here is the new chapter I promised.

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**Chapter Four** – Losing Control

Jack woke up to an annoying sound coming from his backpack. He glanced over at the alarm clock on his nightstand, 7:15 am. Who would call him this early? The only person he could think of, and the only person it would be worth getting up to answer for was lying there sleeping peacefully in his arms.

He just ignored the sound and buried his head in Kate's hair. She was lying partly on top of him, with one of her legs sluggishly tossed over one of his, her head firmly on his chest and her face hidden under his chin. Noticing how peaceful she looked, he smiled down at her.

"_Stop watching me"_ a soft and very tired murmur was heard.

"_You're awake"_ He stated.

"_You didn't think that awful ring tone of yours would wake me up?" she mumbled._

"_Sorry about that, I'll kill who ever called later, if it would make you feel better." _He gave her a goofy smile as she tilted her head up towards his.

Noticing her position, the brunette moved off of him, a little too fast for Jack's liking. Was she that uncomfortable lying next to him? Alright, not next to, on top of… but still. Considering the fact that she was the one that had moved closer to him and not the other way around, he had taken that as a sign that she was very comfortable.

Looking disappointed, Jack sat up on the bed and slung his legs over the edge, turning his back to her. He felt the bed shifting slightly as Kate moved closer to him and sat next to him.

Jack waited for her to say something, but when the words never came, he turned his head to meet her eyes. She looked a little ashamed, he could tell from the shade of her eyes. Giving her a warm smile he stood up, and offered her his hand. _"You hungry?"_

Kate didn't answer. Instead she asked him with her eyes 'We're not going to talk?'

Jack picked up on the change in her expression, and gave her a smile that told her that it was okay.

"_Come on"_ he said as he took her hand and pulled her up from the bed.

Regretting that he had just blown off his parents the night before, Jack mentally prepared for the worst as he walked down the hallway to the kitchen, still holding Kate's hand.

"_Morning kids"_ Margo greeted them as she heard them enter.

"_Morning Ma"_

"_Good morning Mrs. Shepard."_ Kate's voice was barely audible.

Jack's mother glanced up at them, her eyes falling on their entangled fingers _"Do you want some breakfast?" _she asked casually.

"_Yeah we'd love some."_ Jack answered for both of them.

Letting go of Kate's hand, Jack took a seat at the table across from his mother. Turning his head to Kate, he realized that she was still just wearing his white t-shirt. He quickly glanced at her tanned legs and wonder how he had never noticed how nice they looked before, how nice and attractive 'she' looked. Shrugging the thought out of his head, he casually patted the chair next to him and Kate walked over and sat down quietly.

Jack watched carefully has his mom stirred in her coffee with a spoon.

"_Dad left already?" _

Jack's mother didn't even bother to look up and answered with a simple _"Yes"_

Kate gave him a questioning look. They usually talked about everything between heaven and earth during breakfast. Jack wasn't sure what the matter was but he had a feeling it had to do about Kate and last night.

They started to eat and the silence remained until Margo broke spoke up. _"Jack, I just want you to know this is not something we approve of."_ Glancing over at Kate _"Kate, you're a sweet girl, nothing against you personally"_ she moved her attention back to her son _"And I know that you're moving out in just a few days Jack, but as long as you live here you are not having girls sleeping over in your room. Are we clear?"_

Jack gave a lazy nod as response.

"_I know you're an adult and all now, but I hope you're being careful. I want you to consider the consequences if Kate ended up pregnant."_ His mother ranted. Jack exchanged a quick look with Kate, who had lost all color in her face. _"Your whole future would be ruined Jack."_

Jack gave his mother a warning look, telling her to stay out of his business. _"I will consider that."_ He said in a slightly arrogant tone.

After a few more minutes of silence, the teenagers had eaten as much as they wanted, and Jack turned to the brunette. _"Kate why don't you go take a shower, there is a green towel hanging in the bathroom that you can use. "_

Giving him a confused look, Kate nodded slowly _"Uh alright. Thank you for breakfast Mrs. Shepard" _

Margo forced a smile _"You're welcome Katherine"_

Jack waited until he heard the bathroom door close and turned towards his mother, his eyes flashing of anger. _"She stays." _

His mother looked utterly shocked _"Excuse me?"_

"_Kate stays, she sleeps in my room until I leave on Friday, got it?" _He rarely went against his parents will but this time he wouldn't budge.

"_Jack, Kate is always welcome to stay here but she sleeps in the guestroom, those are the house rules and you know that."_

"_Well then we are changing the goddamn house rules, because she's staying in my room."_ He said stubbornly.

Margo was losing her patience _"That's enough! Maybe it's for the best if she just goes home and solves what ever problem she's having with her parents."_

"_No, I am not telling her to go back there."_ He shook his head violently.

"_Jack, what's going on?"_ His mother gave him a worried look.

"_I can't tell you… I promised Kate."_ He hadn't actually promised her anything, but he knew that she didn't want him telling people, definitely not his parents.

"_Just please let her stay"_ He begged.

Margo looked anything but convinced. Jack knew he was losing the conversation. _"Otherwise I'll just check us in to a motel." _He threatened.

"_You are being unreasonable Jack."_

"_Please"_ he was begging again. He hated it but if that was what it took, he would go down on his knees.

"_Jack this is ridiculous, even if she stays here, what happens on Friday when you leave? I hope you're not planning on having her continuing staying here."_ His mother said mockingly.

Before Jack had a chance to answer his mother continued. _"You're still going to New York right?" _there was obvious concern in her voice.

"_Of course I am."_

"_What then? Are you planning on bring her to your one room apartment in New York, having her sleep in an armchair?"_ Margo joked. _"Seriously Jack she needs to go home."_

Jack didn't answer. He was lost in his own thoughts. Was it possible, could he just bring her to New York? Would that magically solve all the problems? She would get away from her family and even better he wouldn't have to leave her, something he dreaded more than anything. It was perfect.

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You guys still like it...? I'm starting to have doubts myself now ;p 


	5. Letting go

Thank you again for all the reviews:D

My English teacher says I'm a 'bitter disappointment to the English language'. Haha.So I'm rather shocked when I get reviews saying that they love my story and my writing. :o Anyone feel like giving her a call:P

I'm not very good at the American school system… Could someone help me out here… Kate just turned 17, is she out of high school? If not, how many years does she have left? One? And could Jack be 19, going off to med school:D

**>>** And just so you know, I hate Wayne, so in my story he doesn't deserve to be Kate's biological father! (My world, My rules!)

Here's the next chapter :)

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**Chapter Five – Letting go**

Jack was sitting on his bed, reading a text message on his cell phone.

_Hey dude, can't make it to the party tomorrow, sorry. I'll come visit you in NYC as soon as I can though. Have a nice party and a safe trip. / Mark_

Jack had totally forgotten about the party. His friends had made a huge deal out of him moving to New York and had started planning a party. A party everybody Jack knew had gotten invited to. It had taken several of his friends to persuade his parents to let them occupy their house.

Hearing the door open, Jack turned and saw Kate walk in with a towel wrapped tightly around her body.

"_Jack, where are my clothes?"_ She looked uncomfortable by the fact that she was as good as naked.

Jack walked over to his desk chair where her green shirt was lying and picked it up then bent down to pick up her jeans from the floor. Noticing that they were still not completely dry, he turned towards her with an apologizing smile. _"I guess I should have hung them up last night, they are still all moist."_

Kate sighted. _"That's just great."_ She said sarcastically.

Jack felt guilty. _"I'm really sorry. We could go back to your place and…"_

"_No."_ She interrupted him, as she shook her head slightly.

"_We could just go there and get some of your stuff and bring them back here."_ He tried again. _"You do need some clothes, unless you're planning on wearing these for the rest of your life" _he said referring to the garments he was holding in his hand.

Kate gave him an unimpressed look. _"I guess you're right."_

"_I'll come with you."_ he offered.

She smiled as she took the clothes from him. _"Thanks."_ She walked over to the door and headed back to the bathroom to get dressed.

Jack had a hard time finding his car keys, but finally managed to find them in the kitchen. _"Alright, lets go"_ he said as Kate came out of the bathroom dressed in the clothes from the day before.

"_Where are you going Jack?"_ Margo asked just as he was about to open the front door.

"_Over to Kate's place, be right back"_ he said as he closed the door behind them.

Driving in silence for several minutes, Jack started to feel uneasy. There was so much he wanted to ask her, but he didn't want to push her in to talking.

Glancing over at the brunette who sat next to him, he wondered if she would actually consider coming with him to New York.

"_You ok?"_ he asked, as he noticed the sad look in her face.

She gave him a small nod as response and continued to watch the road.

"_Do you want to talk?"_ he tried carefully.

Kate let her eyes meet his and smiled weakly, as she shook her head.

"_Ok"_ At least he had tried. He really didn't want to push her, afraid that it would have the opposite effect.

Driving up to her house he had noticed that Kate had tensed up. He turned off the engine and gave her a reassuring look. _"I don't think either one of them are home." _He stated.

Jack followed Kate with his eyes as she got the spare key from a flowerpot on the porch. She turned to Jack as she unlocked the door and he gave her an encouraging nod.

Walking quickly through the house, they arrived to Kate's room.

Jack quietly walked around in his friend's room, checking the posters that hung on the walls. _"Don't forget about the party tomorrow, in case you want to bring something a little fancier to wear"_ Jack reminded her as she gathered some clothes from her closet. Kate walked over to her bed and laid the garments down. Picking up a black bag from the floor, she walked over to her desk.

Jack noticed how she threw a bunch of photographs and some jewelry in to the bag. Strange, she doesn't even wear jewelry, Jack thought. He watched as she grabbed a couple of books and her ipod and forced them down in to the bag too. Jack's head was spinning. He glanced back on her bed, she wasn't planning on coming back here, he could tell from the amount of clothes she was planning on taking with her.

She was going to run.

The idea frightened Jack. Kate was going to take off. He doubted that she would even tell him, she would just disappear without any warning what so ever. In the 6th grade Kate had run away from home. Jack had been worried out of his mind and hadn't been able to focus on anything, especially not school. His parents had been mad and were never really fond of Kate after that. It was when her parents had just gone through with their divorce and Wayne had moved in. Wayne. All of this was Wayne's fault, he thought angrily. He was glad he hadn't been home. He wasn't sure if he could control his anger if he came face to face with that pathetic excuse of a man.

After throwing the clothes down in to another bag, Kate made her way to the door. _"Are you coming?"_ she asked softly.

Jack snapped out of his thoughts. _"Yeah" _He walked slowly behind her out to the car. Jack took one of her bags and tossed it in the backseat as she opened the front door and sat down with the smaller one in her lap.

Driving back to his parents place, Jack considered whether or not he should confront her with his suspicions about her plans to take off. Maybe he should just let her go, if that was what she wanted. But was it? He doubted it. He had to get her to open up, at least a little. Enough for her to realize that running wasn't the answer.

"_You need to tell someone Kate"_ his eyes didn't leave the road.

Kate glanced up at him with a questioning look._ "You can't just pretend all of this never happened. You need to tell someone, so that they can help you."_ He said solemnly.

"_I told you"_ she answered shyly.

"_I meant someone else, like a physiatrist or the police."_ He explained.

Kate didn't answer. Jack tried to read her expression but had no idea what she was thinking. _"I don't want their help…"_ she finally whispered.

Jack knew she wouldn't change her mind, she never did, not about anything.

Jack took a right turn off the country road and then drove to the side, turning off the engine. Kate gave him a puzzled look when she realized that they had stopped in the middle of nowhere.

"_I need to know what you want"_ he asked directly.

She looked confused_. "About what? The physiatrist?"_ Kate sighted. _"Jack please, I don't want to talk to anybody, please don't make me."_ Her voice was trembling slightly.

"_No that's not what I meant. I need to know what you want to do. About your mother, about Wayne, being kicked out and most importantly, the baby. Are you planning on keeping the baby? Because I have no idea what you want. I feel like I'm in the goddamn twilight zone here!" _He almost shouted.

Kate looked down in her lap, chewing on her bottom lip.

Jack felt awful. He hadn't meant to get all worked up and he had definitely not meant to yell at her. It felt like he was losing his mind. He carefully reached over and took her hand supportively. _"Kate… I need to know."_ His voice was much softer now. _"I don't know how to help you, unless I know what 'you' want."_

"_I just want all of this to end. I'm not strong enough to deal with this. I just want it all to go away"_ she ranted, crying.

Leaning over, he captured her in his arms and stroked her back gently. _"I can't do that, I can't make it all go away."_ He said, with a tone of ignominy in his voice. _"If I could, I would Kate… I really would."_

"_I know"_ she said sobbing in to his shoulder.

"_I'm gonna leave town."_ She admitted timidly.

Jack wasn't surprise by the fact that she indeed was planning on leaving, but quite surprised that she had actually told him. _"Don't"_ he begged._ "Please don't run"_

"_I have to, I can't stay here Jack. I just can't."_ She tried desperately to explain, wanting him to understand.

"_Come with me to New York"_ He blurred out. Smooth Jack, he thought to himself. You just scared her away even more.

Kate pulled away from his embrace and eyed him suspiciously. _"What?"_

Too late to take it back, he thought. _"If you can't stay here, why don't you come with me to New York?" _he tried to sound logical.

"_That's ridiculous Jack. I can't do that." _She looked almost amused.

"_Why not?"_ he dared her seriously.

Kate looked out the window and fingered a little with a lock from her brown hair. _"I can't, it wouldn't be fair to you."_ She said softly.

"_Why don't you let me worry about what's fair to me." _

"_I don't want to Jack, Ok!"_ She said as firmly as her voice allowed her. She nibbled on her lower lip. _"I don't want to."_ she repeated quietly.

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Please keep reviewing, it makes me feel all goodie :D 


	6. Back on Track

Thanks again for all the nice reviews! you're the best :D

And a special thanks to nikki-da-latina, the mug is all yours ;)

Here's a new chapter :) Sorry that it took -checking her watch- a whole day for me to update again ;p

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**Chapter Six – Back on Track**

"_Jack, is that you?"_ Margo's voiced was heard from the kitchen, the second Jack opened the front door.

"_Yes"_ he said shortly.

His mother's head appeared from around the corner, looking surprised to find Kate standing next to her son._ "Hello Kate. I thought Jack drove you home."_

"_Well, apparently I didn't"_ Jack answered edgily for her, walking passed his mother. He could feel Kate's presence behind him as he walked to his room, dragging both of Kate's bags with him.

"_I'm sorry if I upset you in the car."_ Kate said quietly, as she closed the door to his room.

He didn't answer. He saw no point in starting up this discussion again.

"_Jack…"_ she tried again.

"_I'm fine"_ he snapped at the girl, at once feeling slightly bad using such a harsh tone with her.

"_Jack… I'm sorry." _Her voice was full of regret._ "I just can't come with you to New York. I would feel too bad, invading like that on your life. I wish I could, but I can't do that to you."_ She confessed, as tears slowly streamed down her face. _"Please don't ask me to ruin your life"_

"_Kate you could never ruin my life." He said taking her into his arms._

"_Have you even thought about this? How all of this would affect your life… if I came with you"_ she asked, moving even closer to him.

He hadn't. But how much could it affect him, except that he didn't have to constantly worry about her whereabouts. So what if his new apartment was a bit small for two people, they'd mange, he was sure of it.

"_It would work, I promise."_ He sounded certain of what he said, maybe more than he was. _"Promise me you'll think about it"_

"_Jack..."_ she started, but didn't have a chance to finish.

"_Promise me"_ he pleaded.

"_Alright, I promise that I will think about it."_ She answered softly and smiled up at him.

Several minutes past, as they stood in the middle of Jack's room, with their arms securely around each other.

"_I need to go to the mall and pick up some things I'll need in N.Y."_ He said, as he reluctantly let go over her_. "Do you want to stay here or..."_

"_I'll go with yo_u." Kate said cheerfully, grabbing his hand, dragging him back out to the car.

Driving to the mall took longer than usually. Jack was desperately trying to concentrate on the road, but his mind wouldn't let him.

Kate had promised to think about it. He smiled at the thought. That's a good thing, right? Now he just needed to convince her that it wouldn't ruin his life. How hard could that be?

Walking around for a couple of hours buying tons of things he believed he'd need at his new place, Jack noticed that Kate was getting bored.

"_You know if you want you could go check on some stores on your own"_ he offered.

"_No thanks I'll just go with you"_ she answered unfocused, fingering on a huge mug with the text 'I love you' written across the front.

"_Kate?" _

She turned towards him. _"What?"_

"_Why don't you go to the store across from this one and I'll come get you when I'm done here."_

Kate's eyes followed Jack's and her face lit up as she noticed it was a clothes store

"_I know how much you love clothes…"_ he said sweetly.

"_Alright I'll go if you want to get rid of me that badly"_ she joked and headed towards the other store.

Paying for everything, he dragged three huge shopping bags with him, out of the store. Jack tried desperately to find Kate, searching through the whole clothes store.

Walking past a corner he saw her holding an adorable blue baby creeper, with matching blue pants and a tiny white jacket.

He walked over and put down the shopping bags next to her. "Hi" he said lovingly, as he placed a hand on her shoulder. She tilted her head and looked up at him with a shyly smile on her lips. Jack smiled back down at her and she leaned back against his chest.

"_Do you want to get them?"_ He asked thoughtfully.

Kate was about to answer but she suddenly hesitated. _"I don't know. I didn't bring any money."_

"_If you want to, I'll buy them for you."_ He offered her

Jack could tell that she was thinking.

"_I don't know"_ she finally answered.

Kate let out a sigh, as she let her fingers run over the soft fabric in her hands.

"_They are just pieces of material… Buying them doesn't mean you've made a final decision Kate"_ He tried to make it easier for her.

She tilted her head slightly and studied his face. Glancing back at the baby clothes, she nodded.

"_Ok then. Do you want to get the matching shoes too?"_ he asked referring to a pair of miniature sneakers standing on a shelf right in front of them."

Kate looked up and smiled, noticing the tiny white shoes for the first time. _"Oh they're beautiful."_

Jack smiled, as he took down the shoes and handed them to her. _"Well I'm all done, so let's go"_ Jack said as he guided her to the check out with his hand protectively placed on her lower back, carrying the bags with the other.

"_You bought a lot of stuff"_ Kate stated as they were packing everything in to Jack's car.

"_Yeah I need a lot of stuff for the apartment"_ he explained. _"I don't really have any kitchen appliances… not that I have anything else for that matter." _Jack chuckled.

She opened the door to the passenger seat and sat down with the bag from the clothes store in her lap. Jack noticed how she was glancing down at the bag the whole ride back to his parents' house, and couldn't help to smile at her.

When they got back, Jack's mother had complained about them leaving without telling her. Jack couldn't help but roll his eyes. He wondered if she was aware of the face that he was twenty-one.

"_Jack about tomorrow, me and your father will leave around 7 o'clock in the morning. We would appreciate if you didn't tear the house down until we come back."_

Jack gave her a reassuring smile. _"It's not going to be a huge party, don't worry."_ It was a white lie, what they didn't know wouldn't hurt them.

"_Well, we'll be back before you leave on Friday." _

"_That'll be great."_ he answered unfocused, noticing that Kate no longer was standing next to him. He excused himself and walked to his room.

Kate had spread out the baby clothes on his bed. Other than the baby creeper, the pants, the jacket and the miniature shoes, there was also a pair of white soaks and a light blue baby hat.

Jack watched her carefully from the door opening, smiling, as she tenderly placed the clothes in a different order.

He was positive that she would be a terrific mother. Considering how sweet, thoughtful and caring she was now, towards everybody she knew, he couldn't even start to imagine how loving she would be to her own child. He closed his eyes and visualized Kate holding a beautiful little baby in her arms. Jack smiled, he opened his eyes again and continued to watch her in silence.

Kate looked up and noticed him as he took a step forward and closed the door behind him. _"Have you seen how tiny they are?"_ She asked delighted, giving him a shy smile.

Jack nodded, giving her a loving smile.

"_I can't believe anything could be small enough to fit in these."_ She said as she took the small white jacket and held it up.

Her expression turned serious. _"Although I can't believe there is something inside of me, which in time will be big enough to fit in these clothes."_ She was biting on her bottom lip, suddenly fascinated by her hands.

Jack waited for her to continue, but she didn't. Glancing over at her tear filled eyes, he could tell that she didn't want to dive further in to the issue at the moment. Trying to ease the tension Jack took one of the tiny shoes in his hand, studying it. _"You sure these are baby shoes and not meant for a doll?"_ he asked with a goofy grin.

Kate looked up and smiled at him, as to talk him for changing the subject. _"Of course they are silly!"_ she said and hit him playfully in his chest, taking the shoe from him.

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Please keep reviewing so I know if you still like it :) 


	7. Alone Is All I Know

Thanks for all the reviews :) and thanks to my dear twin sister for all your help and inspiration ;)

Here's a new chappy…

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**Chapter Seven – Alone is all I know**

Jack was exhausted, he had been packing most of the afternoon. His room now looked a lot like a storage room. He exhaled loudly and turned his head slightly to the left. Kate was sitting at the other end of the couch, enthralled by the movie playing on the television. He smiled, and turned his attention back to the TV.

Jack let out a yawn and closed his eyes tiredly. Resting his head against the back of the sofa, he lost track of time. Opening his eyes again, he at once became aware of the fact that Kate was gone.

He could feel his heart started to beat faster. Where would she go? He looked up at the watch on the wall, 9:30 pm, he'd only been asleep for thirty minutes.

Standing up from the couch, he walked hurriedly around the house. Not being able to find her, he started to panic.

"_Kate?"_ he called out loudly.

"_Jack what's the matter?"_ Margo's voice was heard down the hall.

"_Mom have you seen Kate?"_ he asked anxiously.

"_No, maybe she went home."_ His mother answered logically.

Jack just ignored her and walked back to the hallway and down the corridor, stopping outside the guest room. He opened the door slowly, not to wake her up, in case she was sleeping in there.

Stepping in to the room, he noticed that it was empty just as all the other rooms. He cursed to himself. Had she just left? She had promised to consider coming with him to New York. Was this her way of telling him she wasn't coming with him? Jack kicked the door shut violently, as he left the room.

"_Jack, what was that?"_ he could hear his dad ask inquiringly.

"_I just tripped, don't worry about it"_ He lied.

Walking passed his own room, Jack heard a muzzled noise. Stopping in front of the open door, he looked in and found it empty just has he had minutes earlier when he had checked.

He heard quiet sobs and stepped in to the room, looking around. _"Kate?"_ he asked softly.

He spotted her curled up in a corner, hugging her legs, with her forehead resting against her knees.

Jack rushed over and kneeled down next to her _"What's wrong?"_

She didn't move or make any sign that she had even heard him.

Jack placed a hand on her back and moved her towards him, so that he could reach around her with the other arm too.

Kate tensed up by the sudden closeness, but almost immediately relaxed against the warmth of his body. _"What's wrong?"_ he tried again.

She continued to sob against him hiding her face in his shoulder. Jack whispered soothing things in her ear, trying desperately to calm the brunette down.

"_My dad called, he had talked to mom…"_ she sighed between sobs.

Jack glanced down and noticed for the first time her cell phone, lying next to them. This couldn't be good, Kate's mother was anything but sensitive. God only knows what she had told her father. Although, Jack had always believed that her dad was the more rational one of her parents.

Kate held her breath, trying to calm her breathing, unsuccessfully. _"He said he was disappointed in me, that he was ashamed to have me as his daughter."_ She divulged.

Her body started to quiver in his arms and her sobbing turned to frenetic crying.

Kissing her hair softly, Jack squeezed her closer. _"Kate its ok…"_ he whispered lovingly in her ear.

"_No, its not!"_ she exclaimed frustrated.

Jack pulled her in to his lap. _"Kate, if he knew the truth, he wouldn't be disappointed in you… you know that…"_ he said tenderly, trying to make her feel better.

She shook her head against him and continued to sob quietly. Jack got the feeling she wanted her father to be disappointed, that she for some reason didn't deserve better.

"_You haven't done anything wrong, no one can blame you for this…"_

Jack continued to hold her tightly and leaned slightly against the wall. He could feel her breathing slow down and her sobbing finally fading away.

Jack felt himself drift off to sleep again. He had nestled his head down in Kate's hair and rested lazily against the wall behind him with his back.

"_Maybe we should go to bed?"_ She more stated than asked.

"_Yeah"_ he answered tiredly, standing up he offered Kate his hand.

Kate took it and let him pull her up. She walked over and grabbed her bag and left for the bathroom to get ready for bed.

Jack strolled around in his room, looking at all the boxes. There was no way he could bring all of these with him. Maybe he could leave a few and just bring the most important stuff to New York.

He heard Kate open the door again, he turned to face her. She put down her bag in a corner next to a high pile of boxes, and went back to the door.

"Where are you going?" he asked curiously.

She hesitated and gave him a nervous smile. "The guest room?"

"Oh, ok" was all he could say. He wasn't sure if she didn't want to sleep next to him or if she just didn't want to break his mother's silly so called house rules. Incase it was the first one, he didn't want to inquire her about it.

"Good night" she said softly and closed the door.

Jack couldn't sleep, he was trying to figure out what was going on inside Kate's head. Why was she sleeping in the guest room? This was ridiculous, why hadn't he just asked. She was probably just feeling obligated to follow his mother's wishes.

The second he closed his eyes, he heard Kate's voice pierce through the silence that hung over the house.

"_Jack!"_

He was up in a second, running down the hallway. Halfway down the hall, his parents stepped out of their bedroom giving him a curious and rather worried look. _"What's going on?"_ Christian asked.

"_I got it"_ he said shortly, as he opened the door to the guestroom.

Kate was lying in the middle of the bed, entangled by the white sheet. Jack could see that she was fighting off something in her sleep, waving her arms slightly. Jack sat down on the bed next to her and gently stroked her cheek with his hand. This made her toss and turn even more violently, no longer trying to get away from an invisible force, but his hand.

"_Kate, wake up!"_ he tried softy.

She made no sign that she had heard him, so he tried again, this time a bit louder. _"Kate, you've got to wake up"_

Her eyes opened instantly and she looked around trying to find something familiar with her surroundings. Jack sympathetically placed his hand on her cheek, carefully turning her head towards him. _"Shh, it's ok"_

When their eyes met, Jack could see tears slowly rolling down her face.

Kate sat up shakily and threw her arms around his neck.

Jack just held her and let her calm down. _"You alright?"_ he finally asked softly.

She nodded _"I just had a bad dream… How naïve of me to believe I had gotten ride of them." _She was still clinging herself to Jack, refusing to let go of his neck.

"_The dreams? You usually have dreams like this?"_ he asked worriedly.

"_Every night."_ The girl answered miserably. Her honesty surprised him.

He slowly stroked her back with his hands. _"What did you dream about?"_ he asked carefully.

Jack could feel her shift awkwardly in his arms.

"_You screamed out my name…"_ he continued, trying to get at least a little information out of her.

"_I did?" _She looked sincerely surprised.

Jack gave her a small nod and a look that told her he was till waiting for her to answer his question.

"_I don't remember…" _she said, her eyes not meeting his.

He knew she was lying, she was a terrible liar. But he didn't hold it against her, she'd talk when she felt ready, he knew that.

"_Come here"_ he said, lying them down on the bed without letting go of her.

He moved so that Kate was now lying next to him, facing him. She placed her hands casually on his chest to get some distance between them. _"Jack wait… what about you parents? I thought we weren't allowed to sleep in the same room."_

He smiled at her. _"They are going to my uncle in the morning, I'm pretty sure they won't wake me up before they leave. Plus, I never promised them we wouldn't sleep in the same room. The rule was no girls in 'my' room. And well there is no one sleeping in my room right now." _He said with a childish grin across his face.

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What do you think? Please r&r ;) 


	8. Feeling Safe

thanks for the reviews :) and thanks to my beta-sister :)

New chappy!

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****Chapter Eight – Feeling Safe**

Feeling the sunlight hitting his eyelids, Jack stirred. He felt unusually thoroughly rested.

He could feel another body pressed up against his. He knew it was Kate's. He recognized the softness of her skin, the smell of her hair, the touch of her hand. What, wait? What was he thinking? He shrugged off the thought, of course he didn't recognize things like that. Was that even possible, to be able to identify a person by their touch?

Jack still didn't want to open his eyes to the sharp light he could feel was surrounding him. He just wanted to stay in this exact position forever. Having Kate so close that he could feel her breathe slowly, feeling ever breath she exhaled against his cheek, knowing that she was safe.

Suddenly wanting to see the girl in his arms, he slowly opened his eyes.

They were lying much closer than Jack had thought. Kate's lips weren't even an inch away from his and his forehead was resting gently against hers. How hadn't he noticed that, before opening his eyes?

He didn't dare to move, because of the risk of her waking up. Waking up and moving away.

He watched her, seeing her smile in her sleep. He subconsciously licked his lips, considering the consequences of kissing her.

Feeling Kate move slightly brought him back to reality. He let his hand trace down her side gently, resting it on her waist.

He could feel himself holding his breath as Kate slowly opened her eyes tiredly.

She smiled at him sweetly as soon as their eyes locked. When she made no indication of moving away, Jack exhaled and smiled back at her.

Realizing that they were lying so close that it was hard for him to see her eyes properly, Jack tilted his head back slightly. "Did you sleep alright?" he asked thoughtfully.

"Yeah" her voice was soft and a bit sleepy.

"No more nightmares?" he asked with a concerned face.

She shook her head slightly. "No" Jack could feel her cuddling closer to him.

"Thank you" she said shyly, her voice barely audible.

He leaned closer and placed a soft kiss on her forehead, then one on her hair. "My pleasure" he whispered in her ear.

Ten minutes passed, Jack continued to hold her in a comfortable silence.

"I love this" she suddenly murmured

"This what?"

"You holding me. Waking up, feeling safe." She divulged, looking directly in to his eyes. Jack could see that she was blushing.

He smiled. "I'll hold you every single night, if it makes you feel safe." He promised lovingly.

Her expression turned curious, not shocked, but her eyes asked him what he had meant.

What had he meant? Jack's head was spinning. Did he just offer to hold her ever single night for the rest of their lives?

"I would like that" she said barely audible.

Jack wasn't sure he had heard her. Even if she had said what he thought, did it mean what he hoped?

Kate gave him a shy smile seeing his confused expression. "I want to come with you to New York."

Jack's face lit up. "Really?"

She smiled and nodded.

Jack felt like he was floating on a cloud. He tried to tell himself to get a grip. She had just agreed to go with him. It was probably just a temporary solution for her, until she figured everything out.

Feeling Kate suddenly tense up in his arms he turned his attention back to her. The second his eyes met with hers, she pulled away from his embrace and ran towards the bedroom door.

"Kate?" Jack asked worriedly as he sat up in the bed.

Jack could hear her close the bathroom door as he stepped out in the hallway. Walking quickly down the hall, he stopped in front of the bathroom door. He knocked softly on the door before opening it.

Kate was sitting on the bathroom floor half hanging over the toilette. Jack sat down next to her and rubbed her back gently with his right hand. As Kate leaned closer to the toilette he held her hair with his other hand as she vomited.

"You okay?" he asked with a concerned voice.

As Kate leaned back against is body, exhaling loudly, Jack could see the tear stains on her cheeks. "Just peachy" She said in a sarcastic tone.

Jack gave her a sympathetic smile, folding his arms protectively around her trembling body.

Helping her up on her feet, Jack guided her out to the kitchen and sat her down on a chair.

"You hungry?" he asked.

She shook her head slightly as Jack heard his alarm clock go off in his room.

"I'll be right back" he said and walked fast down the hallway.

Opening the door to his room, he immediately noticed that his bed was made. Great, mom's going to have a field day when she gets back, Jack thought as he turned off the alarm. He put on a t-shirt and headed back to the kitchen.

Jack saw Kate standing in front of the kitchen counter. He walked up to her quietly and embraced her from behind.

"What are you doing?"

Feeling the brunette lean back against his chest, Jack rested his head on hers. "Pancakes"

"I just figured out another reason to bring you to New York." He said goofily.

Kate tilted her head back slightly to see his face. "Don't even think that you can turn me in to your mother"

"I was kidding" he said innocently and kissed her forehead.

She gave him an unconvinced look.

Kate turned her attention back to the pancakes. He leaned closer and inhaled the wonderful scent of her silky hair, as it tickled his face. Jack couldn't believe how natural it felt to just stand there, holding her.

He protectively placed one of his hands on her stomach, making small circles with his thumb. He leaned his head down and smiled at her. She smiled back shyly.

"Do you think it's a boy or a girl?" he asked, almost certain that she would say, a boy. She had after all bought blue baby clothes.

Kate's expression turned uncomfortable, as she glanced back down at his hand. Hesitating with her answer, Jack stopped moving his thumb, regretting he had asked.

"I don't know", she finally answer.

Jack felt rather uneasy. Not sure what to say next. Should he move his hand away from her stomach?

"What do you think?" she asked quietly.

He's smiled softly at her. The tension was gone. "I think it's a girl."

Her expression eased a bit and she gave him a weak smile.

"Pancakes all done" Kate announced and moved away from his embrace. Jack at once felt cold, missing the warmth of her body in his arms.

Jack sat down lazily at the table and Kate placed a huge plate of pancakes in front of him.

"This is what I call a real breakfast!" he announced

Kate let out an adorable giggle and sat down at the opposite side of the table.

"So what do you want to do today?" She asked curiously

"I don't know. Anything you want to do before we leave?" He loved the sound of that, 'before we leave'. He still couldn't believe she was coming with him.

"Not really"

"Are you going to tell your mom that you're leaving?" he asked carefully.

Kate looked like she was considering it. "No" She finally said firmly.

Jack gave her an understanding nod and went back to his pancakes.

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Let me know if you still like it ;) 


	9. Outsider

Thanks for all the reviews :)

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Chapter Nine – Outsider**

Jack felt like canceling the party. He'd much rather just sit here on the couch and talk to Kate all night long. Time had flown and it was almost 7 o'clock.

Kate was lying down, her feet resting in his lap. Jack was massaging them gently smiling to himself, thinking about New York.

Feeling Kate pull back her feet and sitting up next to him, he gave her a worried look. _"What's wrong?"_

"_Did you sleep with Jennifer?" _Kate asked hesitantly. Jack gave her a strange look. Why was she bringing up his ex?

"_What?"_ he questioned casually.

"_Did you…?"_ her voice told him that she really wanted to know.

Jack shook his head. _"No, I didn't."_ He felt surprisingly happy that he was able to give her that answer.

She looked like she was processing the information he had just given her. _"What about Sarah?" _Kate continued her inquiry.

He gave her a confused look. _"You know I did."_

She nodded slightly as if she remembered something she had already known. _"How long after you got together?"_ she asked quietly.

"_Does it matter?"_ Jack was starting to feel uneasy about the conversation. Where was this coming from?

"_No, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked"_ she trailed off.

He took a breath and answered her, still no clue why she was asking these questions. _"5 months"_

"_That's pretty long"_ she stated.

"_I guess"_ He said giving her an oblivious smile.

"_What about you and Tom?"_ He felt slightly bad for asking. Knowing she couldn't get away from answering, since she had just asked him the same question.

She didn't answer though. Instead she studied his face carefully.

"_You don't have to answer if you don't want to…"_ He said softy, feeling the need to give her an opportunity to end the conversation.

"_Uh I'm not sure how many months it'll be, but well, 10 weeks ago."_ She divulged.

"_That was the first time?"_ he asked a bit shocked.

"_Only time"_ she said shortly.

"_Oh"_ He didn't think it was a coincident that this was around the time Kate had been getting back drawn and shutting Tom out of her life.

Jack leaned forward and kissed her forehead.

Kate gave him a weak smile as the sound of the doorbell interrupted them.

Standing up, Jack smiled at the brunette. _"Why don't you go get ready for the party?"_

Kate hurried away down to the bathroom, as Jack opened the front door to let his friends in.

Jack seated them in the living room and went to the kitchen to get some snacks and beverages. On his way back to the living room he ran into Kate.

"_Joe, Trey, Tina, Lindsay and Gary are in the living room"_ Jack explained to Kate in an almost warning way.

She didn't look too thrilled. Jack's friends weren't exactly her friends. They accepted her pretty much only because Jack did. On top of that she was younger than them, except for Lindsay, who was the same age as her.

Jack gestured for her to follow him as he walked back in to the room.

Joe and Gary were sitting on the couch with Tina in the middle, while Trey was sitting lazily in the armchair with Lindsay in his lap. Kate greeted them with a week smile, which wasn't returned.

Trey gave Jack a questioning look, raising one of his eye browses. _"Austin's here?"_

"_As you can see, yes"_ Jack's voice was cold. He hated that his friends had a problem with Kate. He never understood why, she had never done anything to upset anyone of them.

"_I thought it was just gonna be the six of us"_ Lindsay exclaimed frustrated.

Jack gave the blonde a warning look, telling her to watch it. He never liked Lindsay, with her spoiled and bitchy behavior. She had become one of their little gang just recently, when she started dating Trey.

"_So when does everybody else get here?"_ Tina asked curiously.

"_I guess in an hour or so" _

Jack wanted to scream. Whose idea was it to just be the six of them for an hour before the party started? I might have seemed like a good idea when Trey and Gary had planned it, but it really didn't anymore.

Placing a protective hand on Kate's back, Jack exhaled loudly.

"_So Shepard, when can we come visit you in NY? We could have an awesome weekend, hitting the clubs and stuff"_ Joe said, running his hand through his brown hair.

"_I don't know, when I'm all moved in I guess."_ Jack answered unfocused, glancing at the watch on the wall. Oh my God, the stupid time stood still.

Kate sat down in opposite armchair to Trey, and Jack casually sat down on the armrest.

Talking mostly about New York and Jack's future plans, the time finally passed and it was almost 8 o'clock.

Jack noticed how Lindsay gave Tina a look and they both stood up. _"We're just gonna go to the bathroom and freshen up. We'll be right back" _Tina said as they left the room.

There was a loud knock on the door, followed by several loud voices. Jack glanced down at Kate and placed a reassuring hand on her shoulder.

"_I'll be right back"_ he said gently and walked out of the living room, leaving Kate alone with Gary and Joe. Trey was already making his way to the front door and acting more like the host than Jack did.

After a lot of 'hellos' and 'how are you's' in the hallway Jack pointed everybody in the direction of the living room. Walking in to the kitchen with Trey close behind, Jack started to pile up some beer on the kitchen table.

Trey leaned casually against the kitchen counter _"Please Jack, don't tell me you're sleeping with the Austin-chick"_ he sounded amused and a little worried at the same time.

Jack's eyes narrowed and he spun around coming face to face with Trey. _"Why?" _He asked threateningly.

"_I'm just saying… the girl is trouble. You saw what happened to Tom"_ he said nonchalantly

"_No, tell me what happened to Tom."_ Jack dared him. He was starting to get pissed off.

"_Easy dude, I'm on your side here. My point is just to that have some fun with her, but don't get emotionally involved, she's not worth it."_

Trey barely finished what he said before Jack's fist connected with his face. He jumped back in surprise more than pain and his hand flew to his mouth.

"_What the hell is your problem Shepard?"_ He shouted, as his finger ran over his now split lip.

"_Don't you ever talk about her like that again"_ Jack warned him.

"_Geez man, next time just tell me to shut up, don't freakin' hit me!"_ Trey exclaim with a dumb grin on his face.

Jack's expression was blank. He knew Trey had tried to ease the tension and get him to laugh, but it definitely wasn't working.

"_Why don't you bring those in to the living room"_ Jack said sternly, nodding towards the beer pile on the table. "I'll go check where Linds and Tina went." He trailed off before leaving the room.

Walking past the empty bathroom, Jack headed towards his own room.

Lindsay was sitting on his bed with the purple clothes bag in her lap, opposite on the bed was Tina holding up the white baby jacket. Tina had a huge grin on her face and turned to Jack as soon as she noticed his presence.

"_Something you're not telling us Jack?"_ She asked amused, smiling mockingly at him.

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Please r&r :)


	10. Strawberries and Vodka

Thanks once more for the reviews :)

**

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Chapter Ten – Strawberries and Vodka **

"_I thought the two of you were going to the bathroom, not to my room, going through my stuff"_ Jack said, with obvious annoyance in his voice.

"_He's avoiding the question, what does that tell us?"_ Lindsay said, with a grin on her face, just like Tina.

"_I'm not avoiding the question. Those are for my cousin, she just had a baby"_ Jack explained calmly.

Tina eyed him suspiciously. She finally gave him a small nod, as she put the jacket back in the bag, giving him a defeated look.

"_So are you two coming back to the living room, or what?"_ Jack asked casually, glad they had bought his lie.

"_Yeah"_ they answered and followed him back.

Returning to the living room Jack immediately scanned the room for Kate. Finding her, he let out a breath he wasn't even aware he had been holding. She was still sitting in the armchair, where he had left her, fifteen minutes earlier. Jack could see that she was giggling softly, talking to Sonia and Mia. He felt revealed that he had invited them, even though he didn't know them very well. Mia was Trey's little sister and Sonia was Mia's best friend. They had been the only girls Jack had ever seen Kate comfortable around.

Jack smiled at her, as she looked up and noticed him watching her from the other end of the room. She smiled back shyly but at once turned her attention back to the girls sitting next to her.

Mingling a little with his guest, Jack had never been happier about his decision to move to New York. He was really looking forward to getting some new friends and a fresh start, at a new school.

He heard Gary call for him from the kitchen and excused himself from the people he was talking to.

"_What's up?"_ he asked as he entered the kitchen, seeing his friend standing in front of the kitchen table, stirring carefully in the punch, with a ladle.

"_We need ice for the punch"_ Gary explained, looking bothered.

Jack walked over to the freezer and balanced several ice cube trays back to the table.

"_And, did you taste this? It's like something from a child's birthday party" _Gary exclaimed frustrated.

"_So spice it up a bit"_ Jack told him, turning back to the freezer, closing the door.

Jack got some more snacks out of a kitchen cupboard. Putting these next to the punch ball, he noticed the bowl being completely full of ice.

"_Gray you didn't put all the ice in here, did you?"_ He asked slightly irritated.

"_Why?"_ The guy sounded completely clueless, which annoyed Jack even more.

"_Because now it's like a hundred ice cubes, which is just ridiculous" _Jack tried to explain.

"_Relax dude, can't have too much ice."_ Gary reassured him and left the kitchen.

Checking his watch, Jack realized it was already 9 o'clock. He headed back towards Kate and sat down on the same armrest he had been sitting on earlier that evening. He gave the two girls sitting next to her a casual nod to greet them.

Kate looked completely worn out. He placed his hands lightly on her shoulders, massaging them lightly. _"You okay?"_ he asked concerned.

"_Yeah I'm just really tired"_ she said, letting out a small yawn.

"_You know you can go to bed, if you want to"_ he said in a sweet tone, still massaging her shoulders.

"_No I'm good"_ she said warily.

Sonia shot her a suspicious look. _"You're sleeping here?"_

"_In the guest room"_ Kate explained.

"_Oh yeah, I bet"_ Mia said sarcastically, giving Kate a huge grin.

Kate blushed and turned to Jack for help. Considering saying something, Jack just smiled down at her, shrugging slightly.

'Hit The Road Jack' was playing for the hundredth time on the stereo.

Jack turned to Trey who was standing next to the stereo and laughed. _"Seriously, the music…?"_

Kate nudged him, and smiled. _"I think it's funny" _

Jack just gave her a nod and let it go. If Kate liked it, he wouldn't mind listening to that stupid song for the rest of the night.

Hearing someone calling his name again, Jack squeezed Kate's shoulder, and left the girls once more.

Jack was starting to get bored, he'd been talking forever to a blonde guy he didn't even know the name of. Finally getting a chance to excuse himself he headed back to the living room.

Jack heard Kate let out a shriek and turned towards the sound of her voice. First he couldn't find her in the crowd, but he followed everybody else's attention and his eyes finally settled on her, standing next to Tina. Tina was holding the empty punch bowl, grinning evilly at a soaked Kate.

Jack hurried over to her and place one hand on each side of her waist. _"Kate?"_ he tried to get her attention.

She was gasping for breath, eyes unfocused.

"_Is she alright?"_ Jack could hear Sonia ask him with a concerned voice.

Jack could feel that Kate was shaking, remembering that they had exaggerated with the ice, it was no wonder that she was cold.

Inhaling rapidly, he noticed the strong smell of alcohol._ "What the hell did you put in the punch Gary?"_ he asked frustrated turning towards his male friend.

Gary shrugged _"A bottle of vodka…"_

"_A whole bottle of vodka? Are you insane? You were suppose to spice it up a little, there was already a lot of alcohol in it you idiot!" _Jack couldn't control himself any longer. This was just the last straw.

"_Get out! Party's over! Get out!"_ He yelled loudly.

Jack turned his attention back to the brunette who was shivering in his arms. When he hugged her closer, he could hear her starting to cry softly.

"_I'm so sorry I left you alone"_ He said apologizing, burying his face in her soaked hair.

He didn't notice that everybody had left until he looked up from her brown entangled curls.

"_You need to get out of these."_ He said tugging on the bottom of her shirt_. "You'll absorb the alcohol directly in to your system."_

Kate gave him a tired look, and leaned against him unsteadily.

"_Come on"_ He said as he led her to the bathroom.

Stepping in side the bathroom, Jack started to feel nervous. What exactly had he planned to do now? Feeling like he was on the wrong side of the door, he considered to leave.

Glancing down at Kate who was leaning against him with her eyes closed, he realized that there was no way she would even be able to stand up on her own, more than a minute.

"_Kate, have you been drinking anything tonight?"_ He asked worriedly. Her tiredness would indicate that, all though she had been pretty tired the whole evening.

She slowly shook her head as a negative.

Jack carefully guided her in to the shower and stepped in next to her. Helping her out of the shirt he started to unbutton her black pants.

She inhaled rapidly and he stopped immediately. _"You can do that yourself, I guess"_ he said stupidly, dropping his arms to his sides.

"_No, it's okay" _she said quietly, placing a hand on his shoulder to steady herself.

Jack carefully continued and with a little help from Kate he finally got the pants off and threw them on the bathroom floor.

He flipped on the shower and the warm water poured down over Kate, making her move closer to him, away from the water.

Instead of pushing her back towards the water, he embraced her and took a step forward so that they both were standing right underneath the shower. Jack could feel his clothes getting soaked and that it was getting harder for him to move.

Kate's grip on Jack's shirt suddenly got tighter. Jack could hear her starting to gasp for air, coughing softly. Bringing her slightly out from the water he ran his hand gently up and down her back.

"_You okay?"_ He asked concerned.

Letting out a final cough, she nodded tiredly.

Placing his arms firmly on her back he drew her closer to him again. Jack gently placed a kiss on her cheek. He giggled against her skin and placed another kiss right next to her ear.

"_You taste like strawberries and vodka"_ he stated with an amused voice.

He could feel her leaning against him unsteadily. _"Is that true, that skin absorbs alcohol?"_ she asked, her voice sleepy.

He nodded slightly_. "Did you think I just wanted to get you out of your clothes?"_ he asked back jokingly.

She gave him a weak smile telling him that she knew he wouldn't do that.

"_Do you think the baby is okay?"_ She asked concerned.

Jack gave her a reassuring smile. _"I'm sure there is nothing wrong with the baby"_

She nodded obviously pleased with the answer.

Tilting her head down, he noticed that she was blushing. Jack brought her head back with his fingers gently, leveling it with his own. _"What's wrong?" _

She shook her head, smiling shyly nibbling on her bottom lip. _"I feel naked."_

"_You pretty much are naked"_ He chuckled as he glanced down at her black bra with matching panties.

"_Not helping…"_ She said in a sweet tone, giggling faintly.

Jack let out another chuckle and gave her a reassuring smile, as he turned the shower off. He let his fingers trace down her arm lightly, as he stepped out of the shower bringing her with him.

"_Here"_ He handed her a towel and turned around, meaning for her to take off her underwear and dry off. Facing the bathroom door he took off his own shirt and hung a towel over his shoulders.

"_Ok, you can turn around"_ Kate said bashfully.

Kate had wrapped the towel firmly around her body and her wet hair hung naturally over her shoulders.

Back in the guest room he guided her carefully over to the bed and sat her down_. "I'll be right back with something for you to wear, ok?"_ he said as he opened the door and left.

Back in his room Jack took off his soaked clothes and put on a pair of boxers. Placing one of Kate's bags on his bed, he slowly started to go through it. Feeling uneasy looking through her clothes he decided to bring the whole bag back to her.

He opened the door to the guest room slowly and found a sleeping Kate on the bed, still wrapped in the white towel. He smiled. Walking over quietly, he sat down next to her on the bed and stroked a string of her entangled hair out of her face. He brought the cover up and tucked it closely to her body. Leaning forward, he kissed her forehead tenderly and whispered good night.

Kate opened her eyes tiredly and grabbed hold of his hand. _"Don't go"_ she begged quietly.

"_Of course not"_ he said, giving her a reassuring smile. Lying down on top of the covers, he placed his arm protectively around her body and hugged her closely.

* * *

Let me know if you like it. I'm gonna try to write a new chappy tonight :) 


	11. Hiding The Truth

Thanks for the nice reviews )

and thx beta-sister for all your help )

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**Chapter Eleven – Hiding The Truth**

Feeling a bit groggy, Jack opened his eyes tiredly, to find Kate lying heavily against his chest. He had his arms firmly around her smaller body, preventing any subconscious movement, resulting in her moving away from him. The sheet that was supposed to cover them law lazily over them, barely covering Kate's back. Jack could feel the edge of the soft fabric on his hands as he gently made small circles on her bare back with his fingers.

Bare back? Jack snapped back to reality and immediately realized that the girl in his arms was naked. Jack tried desperately to remember what had happened last night. Feeling completely lost, unable to remember anything. He glanced down at the beautiful brunette lying pressed up against his body. What the hell had he done?

Think Jack! He thought to himself. Did he really drink that much last night? He couldn't actually remember, but he didn't think so.

Slowly it came back to him. Throwing everybody out, Kate's shower and then falling asleep. He let out a breath of relief. Thank God.

He continued to stroke her back gently. Not sure if he was trying to wake her up or just wanting to feel her silky soft skin against his fingertips

Feeling Kate stirring, Jack stopped moving his hands. Opening her eyes she smiled sweetly at him.

Jack held is breath, waiting for her to totally freak out.

Kate narrowed her eyes questionably, when she noticed his worried expression. Trying to pull away, Jack stopped her.

"_Wait, don't."_ he said alertly, pulling her back against his chest.

"_Jack?"_ Giving him a confused look, Kate tried once more to move away from him.

Since she hadn't used much strength to get away from him, Jack had no problem keeping her down to him. He grabbed hold of the sheet and pulled it up between them to cover Kate, saving her from any unnecessary embarrassment.

Easing his hold around her body, Kate managed to pull away. She subconsciously placed a hand on the sheet to hold it up against her body. Giving Jack a strange look, glaring down at the sheet, she realized that she was naked. Eyes drifted back up to meet Jack's with a perplexed look in her eyes.

Jack could tell that she had no idea what was going on.

Fear started to spread across her face. The girl moved slightly backwards on the bed to get more distance between her and Jack.

"_Its okay"_ he said, trying to calm her down before she starts to freak out completely.

"_Wa…what happened last night..?"_ she stuttered, her eyes moving around the room, trying to find something to trigger her memory from the previous night.

"_Nothing happened, just calm down…"_ Jack said calmly, moving closer to her on the bed.

Jack could see that she was feeling uncomfortable by the fact that he had moved closer to her.

"_Kate.."_ he said softly, trying to get through to her. As of now, he didn't dare to move any closer or to touch her.

Her expression turned more and more panicked for ever second that passed. Seeing tears slowly forming in her eyes, Jack felt completely powerless.

"_Kate.. Listen to me" he tried again, now with an even softer voice._

She was shaking her head frenetically, refusing to pay attention.

Jack moved a bit closer so that he was now able to place his arms around her. She made no sign of pulling away, so Jack hugged her tight, whispering soothingly in her hear.

"Nothing happened last night, we just fell asleep." He explained truthfully.

He was holding her close, rocking her back and forth slowly, wanting desperately for her to calm down.

"You fell asleep wearing just a towel" Jack explained further. "See" He said, referring to the white cotton towel, lying on the edge of the bed.

Kate turned her head slightly, so that she could see the towel. At once Jack felt her body relax against his. Did she remember? He hoped she did. He couldn't stand that look of distrust and fear in Kate's eyes.

With only a thin sheet separating them, Jack continued stroke her back soothingly.

"You okay?" he whispered softly in her ear.

She nodded against him, resting her head gently on his bare shoulder.

Jack wasn't sure how long they had been sitting on the bed with their arms tightly wrapped around each other, when he heard the front door open.

He sighted loudly, making Kate look up at him. Smiling sweetly down at her, he leaned down and kissed her forehead. "My parents are home" he explained, thinking she might not have heard the front door.

Her expression changed, giving Jack a worried look.

"It's okay" he assured her, giving her another kiss, this time on her hairline.

Making sure the sheet was wrapped securely around Kate's body, Jack let go of her and stood up from the bed.

"Why don't you get dressed" He said, placing her bag that he had brought with him the night before, on the bed next to her.

She gave him a thankful smile. "I'll be right out"

Jack nodded, standing next to the door still just wearing his black boxers. He couldn't make himself turn around and leave the room. She looked absolutely beautiful. Her brown hair hung naturally over her bare shoulders. He's eyes traveled from her hair, down to her lips and then down to the sheet that covered her. The contrast of her slightly tanned skin compared to her white sheet seemed to fascinate him. He could feel Kate observing him, and he tilted his head up and met her eyes.

"Jack?" she asked, Jack couldn't tell if it was concern or suspicion he heard in her voice.

He gave her small smile, turned around and left the room.

Jack didn't get to take more than one step in the hallway, when his mother appeared around the corner.

Margo gave him a disapproving look. "They movers are here" She announced "It would help if you could tell them what you're planning on bringing and what you're going to leave here."

He gave her a nod as response.

"And please put some clothes on" she said, her voice a bit irritated.

Jack hurried off to his own room and pulled on a pair of jeans and a shirt, just as the four movers walked in through his door. Jack quickly pointed out to them what he wanted them to carry out to the truck.

Glancing up he noticed Kate in the doorway. He smiled sweetly at the now fully dressed girl and walked over to her.

"You sure you don't want anything else from your house?" he asked carefully.

"Yeah, positive" she answered quietly.

Jack took her hand in his and led her down the hallway to the kitchen. His parents were standing in the middle of the room talking. The older coupled turned to face them. Jack noticed his mother looking directly at his and Kate's entangled fingers.

"_I find it interesting that you weren't fast asleep in you bed yesterday morning, when we left." _His mother stated with a blank expression on her face.

Kate squeezed his hand harder, and took a small step closer to him. _"Don't start again mom, please"_ Jack answered, feeling slightly annoyed. Why couldn't she just let it go?

Jack turned to Kate and gave her a small smile. _"Why don't you go wait out in the car, I'll be there in a minute." _He suggested, not wanting her to feel trapped in the middle of the argument with his parents.

When Jack turned back to his parents, his mother gave him a frustrated look. "Kate's going with you, isn't she?"

"Yeah" he answered simply.

"Jack!" his father aggregately exclaimed.

"Don't you think her mom wants her to stay here and continue to work at the diner? What would she even do in New York City?" Margo tried to reason with him.

Jack just starred at them, considering what to say. _"Kate's pregnant."_ He bluntly divulged. He hadn't actually planned to tell them that, but maybe it's for the best that they know.

"_Please tell me you're not serious?"_ Margo asked in disbelief.

When Jack made no sign of taking back what he had said or adding any further information, his mother closed her eyes in frustration and shook her head slowly. _"I can't believe this…"_

"_How are you going to weasel yourself out of this one?"_ Christian asked, mockery clearly audible in his voice.

Unbelievable how they just assumed it was his baby, Jack thought to himself. It wasn't as if they didn't know about Tom. Kate had brought her boyfriend with her over to the house several times. Not only did they assume that it was his baby, but that Kate had been sleeping with him, behind Tom's back.

"_Didn't you hear a word I said about the goddamn consequences!" _Margo had raised her voice a lot, now almost shouting directly in Jack's face.

Jack exhaled loudly, getting frustrated by the stupid comment his mother had made. Was she aware that it was only two days ago she had warned him about those kinds of consequences?

"_Kate was already pregnant when you held that precious speech of yours Ma!"_ Jack revealed.

"_And whose fault is that!"_ his mother said accusingly.

Jack knew he could get out of this easily. Just telling them he wasn't the one that had gotten Kate pregnant and everything would be alright. Feeling absolutely no need to do that at the moment, Jack continued to defend himself, now shouting on the top of his lungs.

"You can not-" he started, but was immediately interrupted by his father.

"_Don't you dare, raise your voice to your mother!" _Christian warned him furiously.

Jack took a deep breath and glanced out the kitchen window. The movers were done, they were standing next to the truck, just waiting for him to tell them to go. "This is the way it is, so it's something you'll just have to except" he said calmly looking directly at his parents.

Christian gave him a shocked look. "You're giving us an ultimatum, is that it?"

An ultimatum, was that what he had given them? Jack started to feel anxious. He had started a huge fight with his parents and they were fighting about a problem that didn't even exist. Technically the problem did exist, but it wasn't Jack's problem, at least not in his parents' eyes.

He still couldn't believe that his father was this hard on him. The man had made so many bad choices. He had cheated on mom, Jack knew that, mom even knew that. He had started drinking and was about to lose his precious job.

Jack shot the older man a disgusted look. "Who gave you the right to judge me?"

"_For starters, I didn't knock up a seventeen year old!"_ He father yell angrily.

Jack gave them a disappointed nod, forcing back the unshed tears in his eyes. _"I'm glad I know where you stand." _He said firmly, leaving the house.

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Now it's off to NY... you guys still with me? )


	12. Starting Over

I'm really sorry about the late update. I was admitted to the hospital for a few days, then I had a lot going on after that. 

Well here's a new chapter for ya all :) and thank you for the reviews and thx to my beta-sis :)

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**Chapter Twelve – Starting Over**

The ride to NYC had been smooth. Kate had fallen asleep shortly after leaving and slept most of the way there. Arriving in front of the build that would be he's home for the nearest future, Jack woke the brunette next to him.

The truck with his things parked behind him, just as he stepped out of his car. Jack casually pointed to the huge building in front of them, as if the movers didn't realize that they had arrived.

Jack opened Kate's door and offered her his right hand. Walking side by side Jack curiously read the surnames of his new neighbors as they walked down the hallway of their floor. Jack let go of the warm hand he was holding and tried to unlock the door to the apartment.

He smiled proudly when he finally got it open and moved aside to let Kate in.

Kate stood in the middle of the room, skeptically looking around. _"Is this the whole apartment?" _There was a kitchen area in one corner of the room, which was separated from the living room by a kitchen counter with two bar stools.

"_Pretty much, yeah."_ Jack looked slightly embarrassed. _"There is a small bedroom through that door"_ he pointed at the door to the right, and then turned and pointed at the door on the opposite wall. _"And there is the bathroom."_

"_It's nice, I love it" _she announced.

He turned around and gave her a goofy smile. _"Liar" _

"_No I'm serious. I love it, it's perfect"_ she said sincerely, giving him a warm smile.

It didn't take the team of movers more than an hour to carry all of Jack's furniture and boxes from the truck up to the apartment. As soon as they left Jack and Kate both sat down lazily on the couch which had been placed in the middle of the small living room.

There was a faint knock on the already open door. Jack turned his head slightly and saw a blonde man, about his own age, standing in the doorway.

"_Hey, I'm Damien, I live across the hall. I saw that the movers just left, so I thought it would be safe to offer some help now, without actually getting stuck carrying a mountain of boxes"_ He said jokingly with a grin on his face.

"_Hi, I'm Jack Shepard."_ Jack greeted, as he rose from the couch and walked over to the young man offering him his hand.

"_And that's Kate"_ he continued referring to the brunette still sitting casually on the couch.

Damien nodded politely towards her, which was reworded with an adorable smile from the girl. Jack felt a sting of jealously. He shook it off quickly, telling himself he had nothing to be jealous of, he didn't even have the right to be jealous of anything concerning Kate.

"_Well everything has been carried up here, but it would be great if you could help us get these boxes to where they belong."_ Jack said casually, looking around in the living room.

"_No problem"_

"_So what brings the two of you to New York City?"_ Damien asked curiously as he and Jack started carrying a couple of boxes in to the bedroom.

"_Med school"_ Jack answered simply, putting a second box down on the bedroom floor.

"_That's cool. Both of you?"_ Damien asked, as they walked back out to the living room.

"_No, just me."_ Jack clarified, as they walked back out to the living room. He could feel that Damien was about to ask what had brought Kate, but before he had the chance Jack pointed to another box and gestured for him to carry it back to the bedroom. He didn't feel like explaining anything to his new neighbor, avoiding the questions felt like the easiest way out at the moment.

"_So, are you originally from New York City?"_ Jack asked Damien.

The blonde man shook his head. _"California. My whole family moved over here when I was sixteen."_

Jack dragged a huge box across the living room. It for sure wasn't pillows in this one, Jack thought to himself as he let out a frustrated moan. He glanced over at Kate, who was now unpacking plates in the kitchen area and he couldn't help but smile as she inspected ever plate, scrutinizing them ridiculously closely. What could she possibly be looking for? The plates were completely new, and there for perfectly clean, they had bought them at the mall just a few days earlier.

Finally getting the box in the bedroom, Jack placed it on top of another box and opened it slightly to check what it contained. Realizing the box belonged in the kitchen he gave out a loud sigh.

With some help from Damien Jack got the box over to the kitchen and placed it next to Kate. _"Here you go, another one for you to unpack."_

She gave him an unimpressed smile. _"What?"_ He asked in a slightly concerned voice.

"_I just think it's ridiculous that you won't let me help you with the boxes."_

"_That's because you're not supposed to carry anything heavy, remember?"_ Jack told her with a small smile on his lips. He didn't want to tell her that it was because she was pregnant. Unsure if she wanted their new neighbor to know that.

She gave him a weak smile and reached for two glasses on the counter and placed them on the shelf above her head.

Jack couldn't help to follow her movements with his eyes. She looked absolutely beautiful, even though she wasn't wearing any makeup and her hair was up in a messy ponytail.

As she reached for two more glasses, Jack immediately noticed that she looked slightly unsteady. He took a quick step closer and caught her in his arms just as she was about to drop to the floor.

"_Kate?"_ his voice was full of concern and worry. He was trying desperately to keep her up on her feet without much success. Instead he lifted her up in his arms and carried her over to the couch, Damien followed him anxiously.

"_What happened? Is she alright?"_ The blonde man asked concerned, looking down at the unconscious girl, now lying on the couch.

"_She'll be fine. She just fainted."_ Jack answered distractedly, kneeling down next to the couch, taking Kate's hand in his.

There was nothing to worry about, right? Pregnant women faint all the time, it was no big deal, Jack told himself. Glancing down at the brunette, he still felt unsure. He hated sitting and watching from a distance, as things enrolled in front of his eyes. He hated not being able to do anything. He hated not having control.

Turning his focus back on Kate, he tenderly strokes her cheek with his hand. _"Kate? Come on, wake up" _His voice was soft and gentle, but at the same time, very pleading.

He let out a breath he wasn't even aware he was holding when he saw her stir. Feeling relieved when she slowly opened her eyes, he squeezed her hand lightly, letting her know that he was right there.

"_Hey. Are you okay?"_ He asked softly.

She nodded slightly. _"What happened?"_ She tried to sit but Jack reached up with his free hand and pressed her by the shoulder back down on the couch.

"_You fainted."_ He explained.

Jack stroke her cheek gently letting it trace slowly down to her chin. _"You should rest for a bit."_ He said lovingly, giving her a pleading smile. He had a feeling she would refuse to rest in the middle of the day, especially in the middle of the unpacking.

But she gave him a small nod and looked directly at him, locking her eyes with his. Jack couldn't quiet read the expression on her face. It felt new, like a mix of anxiety and thoughtfulness, or maybe a mix of nervousness and love… Jack tried to piece memories of Kate's face together. It felt like they were all melting together, making it impossible for him to concentrate.

He heard Damien clear his throat behind him, making Jack him turn his head enough to see his new neighbor. _"Well since you're gonna rest and all, I'm going to head back over to my own apartment."_ Damien announced, heading for the door.

"_Thanks for your help, and it was nice meeting you Damien."_ Jack said, turning his attention back to Kate.

"_No problem neighbor. Oh and Kate I hope you'll feel better soon."_ Damien said, as he closed the door.

Jack tugged on Kate's hand making her open her eyes and looking at him once more. _"I'm going to get some groceries and then make some dinner. Promise me you'll rest in the meantime."_

She gave him a cute smile and nodded her head.

Jack couldn't help but smile back down at her_. "Good. I'll be right back." _He leaned down quickly without really thinking about it and gave her a soft peck on her lips. Stepping away from the couch, Jack paced towards the door. What the hell did I just do, Jack asked himself. Stupid, stupid, stupid!

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please r&r 


	13. Moving On

new chappy

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**Chapter Thirteen – Moving on**

Jack stood waiting outside the apartment's front door, with two bags of groceries in each hand. He was unsure how long he had been standing there, but it had to be at least several minutes.

Why am I standing out here? Jack asked himself. He glanced at the doorknob, telling himself that it was no bid deal. So he kissed her, it wasn't like he hadn't kissed her before. No wait, that was the thing, he hadn't actually kissed her before, never on the lips.

Why had he kissed her? Jack's head was spinning, he couldn't even answer his own question.

He took a deep breath and opened the door. His eyes immediately fell on the empty couch, realizing that she was no longer on it, his eyes traveled around the room. Kate was back in the kitchen unpacking another box. She looked up to meet his eyes just as they landed on her.

Jack could feel his heart starting to beat faster, the second his eyes locked with hers._ "Hey"_ he managed to get out, as he walked towards her with the grocery bags.

Kate gave him a shy smile and reached for one of the bags as he placed them on the counter in front of her. She started to unpack the bag and placed a couple of products on the counter.

Jack watched her for a few seconds before he started to unpack a bag of his own. He glanced over at her every time he placed a new item on the counter, feeling thankful that she hadn't mentioned anything about the kiss.

Half way through the first bag Kate stopped and held up a jar of peanut butter and another one containing pickles. _"Alright, I let the peanut butter pass at first, but now I'm starting to see a pattern."_ She said with an amused smile on her lips.

Jack could feel himself blush slightly. He was allergic to peanuts and he hated pickles, she knew that. _"Well, you know, pregnancy usually comes with a handful of different cravings and well peanut butter and pickles are two of the most common."_ He was babbling and he knew it. _"I also got ice cream and several citrus fruits"_ He continued, holding up a box of vanilla ice cream.

"_You know you could dip the pickles in peanut butter or something"_ he trailed off, slightly regretting that he had gotten the products in the first place. In the store it had seemed like a good and thoughtful idea, now it just felt stupid.

Kate looked like she was going to be sick. She was apparently not too keen on his suggestion, Jack thought to himself.

"_You're not going to make me eat that, are you?"_ She asked, as she grinned at him.

Letting out a small chuckle, Jack shook his head as a negative.

"_I wouldn't mind some ice cream though"_ Kate added, with a grateful smile on her lips.

"_Ice cream it is. Maybe we should have some dinner first." _Jack said, trying to think of something they could eat.

"_Yeah, I'm kind of hungry."_ Kate divulged.

Jack felt a bit guilty when he realized that they hadn't eaten since the morning. Of course she was hungry. _"How about some pasta?"_ he suggested.

Kate's face lit up. _"Sounds great"_

Half an hour later they were sitting on the couch eating, surrounded by a comfortable silence. Jack was glancing up at her every now and then watching her as she ate. Her face wore an expressionless look, her eyes just the same. He wanted desperately to know what she was thinking, how she felt concerning the kiss. Was she mad? Scared? Maybe she didn't care. At least that's the way she was acting. Like nothing had happened. He was thankful for that in a way. If she was upset, he'd rather have them act like it never happened.

"_I'm sorry about this morning."_ Kate suddenly said, almost whispering, breaking the silence.

Jack turned his head towards her, watching her curiously. What was she talking about? Kate was all of a sudden very interested in the plate which was carefully placed in her lap.

"_What do you mean?"_ Jack asked.

"_Your parents."_ She glanced up at him, giving him an apologizing look.

Jack sighed quietly. Had she heard them fighting this morning, even though she had been outside?

"_I hope they weren't too mad that you slept in the guestroom."_ She said quietly, her voice full of guilt.

"_Don't worry about it. It _wasn't your fault" He gave her a reassuring smile, glad he hadn't mentioned that his parents had in fact been really upset, mostly about things concerning her. No reason for her to know, she would blame herself and might regret coming with him to New York. Jack definitely didn't want that to happen.

Giving him an unconvinced look, Kate continued to eat her dinner in silence.

He started to hate the silence. It wasn't really uncomfortable but it definitely wasn't comfortable anymore. He tried to think of something to say, but came up empty handed.

When they were done eating, Kate gathered the dishes and headed off to the kitchen.

Jack went to the bedroom and continued the unpacking in there. He opened a box and placed several items on the nightstands. Leaving the box still half full, he went to open another one. He tossed down the content in the chest of drawers placed on the opposite side of the room to his queen size bed.

Just as he was about to opened a third box Jack heard Kate's cell phone from the bedroom. He recognized the song, it was such an odd choice for a cell phone signal. He let out a small chuckle and continued to unpack his clothes in to the nearest closet.

But music didn't stop. He wondered why she didn't answer her phone. She was still in the living room, right? The music suddenly came to an abrupt end. He shook the feeling of worry off and tried to concentrate on sorting through the clothes.

It didn't take long until the sound of the signal reached his ears once more. Feeling a bit uneasy he stood up and walked out to the living room. His eyes scanned the room for the brunette and he immediately found her, sitting on the floor leaning against the couch.

She lifted her head lazily, giving him a blank expression before letting her eyes travel back to the cell phone lying on the coffee table in front of her.

Jack tried his best not to throw himself on his knees and take her in his arms, making sure she was alright. Instead, Jack cleared his throat, which made her look up at him again and he gave her a questioning look. _"Are you gonna answer that?"_

"_It's Tom"_ she answered shortly, letting her eyes travel back to the table. _"He called like 20 times and left like a zillion messages." _Her voice was casual, but he was sure he could hear a tone of distress in it.

Not sure what to reply, Jack walked over and sat down next to her on the floor, just as the song stopped.

"_He's pretty upset"_ She said, still watching the now silent phone.

"_Do you blame him?" _It came out harsher than he had intended.

Kate's head snapped up and she gave him a slightly hurt look.

"_Kate, you skipped town, with his unborn child without even telling him. He has the right to be upset."_ Jack said slowly. He hated to defend Tom, but in this question, he did understand him. If his girlfriend had told him that she was pregnant, broken up with him and then left town, he would be upset too. And if that girlfriend had been Kate, he probably would have killed himself.

"_No I didn't!"_ Kate answered very defensively. _"It's not his baby, so I couldn't have skipped town with his unborn child"_ She exclaimed, repeating the words he had used against her, as she gave him a stern look.

"_He doesn't know that" _Jack gave her a sympathizing smile. _"He deserves to know."_ He added carefully.

Kate lowered her eyes in shame and looked down in her lap_. "I know. Of course he does. It's just…" _she trailed off, looking unsure what she even wanted to say.

"_You don't have to explain everything to him. Just tell him it's not his baby."_

"_He'll get so mad…"_ Kate whispered, sounding terrified.

Jack carefully placed his arm around her shoulders, bringing her a little closer to him. _"It doesn't matter anymore. Tom's out of your life. Just tell him and it'll be over." _He said softly.

"_He'll kill you…"_ She said quietly, continuing to look down, avoiding his eyes.

"_What?"_ Jack asked confused. Why would Tom kill him?

Kate glanced up at him, blushing slightly. _"Tom. He'll assume that the baby is yours."_

That was probably true. Tom had always hated Jack because he and Kate had been close. Tom had even accused him of having something going on with Kate behind his back once. Jack doubted he had had the guts to say that directly to Kate's face though. _"Then just let him believe that. He wouldn't be the first…"_

"I can't do that to…" she stopped and gave him a confused look. _"What? Who else believes that?"_

He walked right in to that. What was the matter with him today? He had started the day by getting in to a fight with his parents, then he had kissed his best friend and now he apparently talked without thinking about what he said for even a second. _"Uh... my parents kind of jumped to conclusions, when I told them that you're pregnant."_ Jack confessed.

Kate gave him an expression that made Jack feel like dying. If he hadn't known better, he would have believed that he had just slapped her across the face. _"You told your parents, I'm pregnant?"_ her voice was barely audible, making Jack shiver by regret.

"_Yeah, I'm really sorry. I know I should have talked to you first, I just felt that I needed to tell them the truth."_ Jack explained regretfully.

Kate seemed to be thinking this over. Like she was trying to figure out how she felt about this piece of information. _"Did you?" _she asked.

Did what? Jack asked himself. Did she mean if I told them the truth? I just told her I did. He felt confused, trying to read her expressionless face. Did she wonder how much of the truth he had revealed to his parents? Probably, Jack thought to himself. _"Just that you're pregnant"_ He finally answered.

Kate nibbled on her lip, looking past Jack, at the front door. _"I'm so sorry. Maybe this wasn't such a good idea"_

Jack subconsciously drew her closer, feeling terrified that she would just sprint for the door. _"Please don't be sorry" _He begged.

Her eyes were unfocused, still looking past him. Jack got the feeling she hadn't even heard what he just said.

"_I was afraid this would happen"_ She said quietly.

Jack moved her head gently, forcing her to meet his eyes. _"Afraid what would happen?"_ he asked softly.

"_Me, screwing up your life."_ She said shamefully. "We've only been here a day and I've already messed everything up."

He wrapped his other arm around her and brought her in to a warm hug. _"You have not messed up my life. You can't imagine how thankful I am that you came with me here." _Jack divulged, feeling her arms tighten their grip around his waist._ "Please don't ever think that you're screwing up my life Kate, because that's not even possible."_

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please be an angel and leave a little review :) 


	14. Everybody Needs Candy

Just so you know.. this chap hasnt been beta-read.. I hope there are not too many mistakes...

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**Chapter Fourteen – Everybody Needs Candy**

They had been watching TV for a couple of hours. Jack had a hard time paying attention to the movie they were watching. The only thing he could really focus on was Kate, curled up in his lap. Glancing up at the screen, he saw a young girl running down a hallway, terrified by what was obviously chasing her.

He could feel Kate clinging closer to him and let his eyes travel back to the brunette. As a loud scream was heard from the TV, Kate buried her face in Jack's shoulder.

He smiled, he loved this movie, even though he had no idea what it was about or even what it was called. The fact that it made Kate cling to him like it was a matter of life and death, just made him love it.

Feeling a bit bad that Kate was actually scared made him stroked her back gently. He loved protecting her, even though he knew she wasn't in any real danger at the moment. But she was scared and she let him hold her close, comfort her. "_You know, we don't have to watch this if you don't want to." _He offered thoughtfully.

Kate peered up at him. _"You don't want to see how it ends?"_

Jack smiled down at her and shook his head. She looked like a terrified child, curled up in a ball in his lap, he thought to himself.

Kate glanced at the screen only to turn her head rapidly back to Jack. _"Then let's turn it off."_ She almost whispered. He reached for the remote on the coffee table and turned the TV off.

Kate looked surprised as she turned to the now silent TV. Looking at Jack, she gave him a confused look. _"I didn't mean turn off the TV, just the movie."_ She explained.

"_What, you want to start watch a new movie now? It's almost midnight."_ Jack asked amused. He was surprise she hadn't fallen asleep already.

She shrugged and stood up. _"I guess you're right. We still need to make the bed. Did you find any bedding when you were unpacking before?" _she asked, walking across the room.

"_Yeah I put some on the bed."_ He answered, as she opened the bedroom door.

"Wow it's beautiful in here. Well, minus the boxes." She said stepping in to the room. Jack was right behind her, realizing that she hadn't actually seen the bedroom until now.

"_Yeah it's pretty nice. As soon as we get the curtains up, it'll be perfect."_ He loved talking in plural. 'We' was easily his new favorite word.

She nodded approvingly, looking at the huge window. _"Maybe we could do that tomorrow"_ she said, all of a sudden sounding very excited.

"_Yeah, we'll do that tomorrow"_ Jack promised.

Jack noticed that she was glancing around the room, obviously looking for something._ "What are you looking for?" _he asked curiously.

"_My bags. Any idea where they are?"_ she asked unfocused, still looking around for them.

"_They are up there"_ Jack answered, pointing on top of the closets.

She gave him a confused look, making him continue. _"I unpacked them, I hope that was ok." _He felt a bit insecure, hoping it wasn't too obvious in his voice that he was.

"_Oh, thanks"_ she said, giving him a shy smile.

"_Your clothes are in that closet and your underwear in that drawer"_ Jack gestured with his hand towards the chest of drawers, remember when he had earlier put them there. He glanced over quickly at Kate, hoping she wouldn't be upset that he had gone through all her clothes.

He didn't actually go through them, right? He felt kind of nauseous at the thought, he had, hadn't he? It hadn't been like when he unpacked his own stuff. He hadn't thought of it at the time, but he had gone through her clothes slowly, memorizing each of her garments. That's just sick Jack, he thought, shamefully.

Kate didn't look uncomfortable though. _"Okay, that's great. Thank you."_ She said as she opened the closet and poked around until she found what she was looking for.

"_I'm just gonna go change in to these"_ she said, with a green spaghetti stripped top and a pair of black pajama pants in her hand.

Jack gave her a small nod as she left the room. He managed to both make the bed and change in to his pajama bottoms before she reentered the room.

"_You can have the bed. I'll sleep on the couch, until we figure something out."_ He said just as she stepped back in to the room.

Looking over at Kate, he could see that she was looking down on the bed. _"We could get one more bed, or well throw this one out and get two single beds or a bunk bed maybe… Later we could put a crib over there"_ Jack trailed off, gesturing to a large niche down the wall.

This made her look up and meet his eyes. _"We're not getting a bunk bed_." She said firmly, with traces of amusement in her voice. _"And I'll sleep on the couch. You're the one that actually has to get up in the morning and do something."_

"_I don't mind sharing it"_ Jack said jokingly, but still serious enough for her to understand that he meant it.

She gave him an almost apologizing smile. _"Maybe that's not such a good idea."_

Jack gave her a confused look. Why not? He wanted to ask, but at the same time he didn't want to push the issue.

"_I should probably just sleep on the couch"_ Kate continued.

"_Why?"_ It had just slipped out, he hadn't actually meant to ask.

Kate looked unsure and a bit uncomfortable, glancing down at the floor.

He wanted to kick himself for pushing her. Do you think it's strange that she might feel uncomfortable Jack? he asked himself. Remember how she woke this morning, in your arms, naked?

"_I'm sorry."_ He managed to get out, apologizing. _"I didn't mean to push you."_ Studying her face he could see that she was biting on her lower lip, till gazing directly on to the floor.

"_You take the bed, I'll sleep on the couch."_ He said firmly, leaving the bedroom in pace.

Jack had walked over to the bathroom to get ready for bed. He stood brushing his teeth looking at himself in the bathroom mirror. He had left the door wide open which made it easy for Kate to appear out of nowhere behind him.

"_Do you mind if I brush my teeth too?"_ She asked carefully, holding up her white toothbrush so he could see it in the mirror, as to prove why she was there.

Jack gave her a small nod and took a step back, giving her access to the washbowl.

Standing right behind Kate, Jack was still able to look in to the mirror. He was not looking at himself anymore, but instead following Kate's ever movement as her toothbrush easily slid over her white teeth.

If felt strange getting ready for bed together. It was in Jack's eyes something only old married couples did. He turned his attention back to his own teeth when he realized that Kate had caught him staring at her.

When they were done, they walked out together, Jack only a step behind the brunette. When the got to the middle of the room, they went in different directions, Jack to the couch and Kate continued off to the bedroom.

Just as he was about to sit down, Kate turned around in the door opening.

"_I don't mind sharing either…"_ Even though she whispered, Jack had no problem hearing her.

"_In general or tonight?" _He asked, not wanting to jump to conclusions about what she meant.

She smiled shyly at him._ "Both"_

_"Are you sure?"_ he asked carefully.

When she gave him a small nod, Jack smiled and walked over to her, guiding them both over to his bed.

Once they had settled in the bed, an uncomfortable silence surrounded them. They each law firmly on their own side of the bed. Or well Kate law on Jack's side and Kate on the side Jack wished she had lain down on. But he hadn't said anything when she had picked the left side, so he let it go.

Glancing over at her he realized she look just about as uncomfortable as the silence was. Jack himself didn't really feel uncomfortable about the situation, only that he knew Kate was.

Maybe the awkwardness was because they had never really gone to bed together like this before. Jack realized that they had never planned that they would sleep in the same bed before, not without an actual reason. That they had ended up in the same bed because he would comfort her or something like that was not the same as this situation.

Jack turned to his side, resting on one of his elbows. Kate looked deep in though, looking up at the ceiling. _"Penny for your thoughts?"_ Jack said with a childish smile on his face.

"_Oh, so that's how much my thoughts are worth?"_ She dared playfully, turning her head to him.

"_Unfortunately I don't have the amount of money your thoughts are worth."_ Jack said sincerely.

He could see that she blushed slightly at his comment, which made him smile even more. What are you doing Jack, his mind screamed at him. Stop flirting with her!

"_I was just thinking about… "_ She smiled at him. _"it doesn't matter."_

"_No come on, please tell me"_ He said curiously, giving her his puppy eye look.

Kate's expression turned serious and she broke eye contact with him, letting her eyes travel back up to the ceiling.

Jack just got the impression she wasn't going to answer. She had closed her eyes and was taking more even breaths now. She hadn't fallen asleep, had she? Jack asked himself.

"_You kissed me…"_ She suddenly stated simply, her voice full of disbelief, as if she didn't believe it had actually happened.

He couldn't really make out anything else out of the tone of her voice. Her words were empty off emotion, something that was often the case with Kate. Jack was probably the one person that could read Kate at all. Compared to other people in Kate's life, Jack could read her like an open book. But right now, he still had no idea what to make out of what she had just said.

Jack had no idea what he was supposed to answer either. She hadn't actually asked him anything. Should he just wait and stay quiet, maybe she would continue if he did.

Kate's voice interrupted his thoughts. _"Why?" _She opened her eyes and turned her head towards him again, waiting for an answer..

Jack gave her a nervous look. "_The truth? I have no idea. I didn't think, it just happened." _He answered shamefully

"_Oh"_ She sounded… disappointed? Why was she disappointed?

Kate gave him a weak understanding nod and turned to her side, facing away from him.

Jack let out a sigh and moved a litter closer, but not so close that their bodies would touch. He gently placed one of his hands on her shoulder. _"Kate?"_

When she didn't respond, Jack tugged on her shoulder gently. _"Kate, please talk to me."_

Kate slowly turned around to her other side, her head just inches away from his. She was nibbling on her lower lip, and Jack could see tears forming in her eyes.

Caressing her cheek tenderly with one of his hands, Jack could feel Kate leaning into his touch. He looked directly at her, his eyes full of love and concern. Jack let his hand travel down her side and settled it on her waist. He could feel her body tremble under his touch, as he saw tears starting to slide down her cheeks.

As Jack moved his head towards hers, he could hear Kate take a rapid breath. Giving her a reassuring smile, he leaned down closer and kissed away the salty tears from her cheeks. Pulling away he could see that she had closed her eyes, and he believed that she was still holding her breath.

Jack glanced down at her lips, trying to talk himself out of what he was about to do. A voice was screaming 'stop' loud and clear in his head, but he knew nothing would be able to stop him right now.

Looking up from her lips, his eyes locked with hers just as she opened them again. He could see a thousand emotions in them, unable to even make out all of them. But he was sure he could see both: love and trust, desire and hope. But he could also see fear.

Letting his hand travel back up to her cheek and in to her hair, Jack smiled lovingly down at her. Then he leaned closer and captured her lips with his. Kissing her softly, Jack realized how amazingly soft lips she had. She tasted amazing too, he couldn't believe they hadn't done this earlier. It felt so right, like they had been meant to do this.

Opening his eyes briefly he noticed that Kate had closed hers.

As his fingers played gently with her tangled hair, he could feel her whole body relax next to him. He pulled away slowly, terrified what her reaction would be like. She hadn't actually kissed him back, but it couldn't be too bad, could it? In that case she would have pulled away, Jack told himself.

Opening her eyes, Kate smiled up shyly at him. _"Kiss me again"_ she whispered pleadingly, like a little girl begging for candy.

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review? pretty please.. 


	15. Security is Everything

thank you for all the reviews and an extra thank you to my betasis :)

new chapter for you :)

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**Chapter Fifteen – Security is Everything**

Jack had never really been a morning person, but this morning he had woken up fairly early. It had never felt so good waking up before. Looking over at the brunette next to him, Jack leaned closer and placed a soft kiss on her hair, resting his hand lazily around her smaller body. He smiled to himself, knowing exactly why he was feeling so unusually good this morning.

Closing his eyes briefly, he tried to replay the night before in his head. He had finally had the courage to kiss Kate. He would definitely remember that kiss forever, and the kiss they had shared after that, and the one after that. Jack smiled at the memory. They had shared a lot of kisses the night before, each more passionate than the last.

Glancing down at Kate, he wondered what possibly could have stopped them for going further than the kissing. He was in several ways thankful that they hadn't, knowing deep down that it wouldn't have been a smart step to take at the time. A step he knew Kate for sure was not ready to take yet.

Jack let his hand travel up her body and settled it on her cheek, feeling her stir under his touch. _"Good morning"_

Kate opened her eyes slightly and smiled at him. _"Good morning"_ she murmured back.

"_Sorry for waking you up"_ He said, without sounding particularly guilty. He let his thumb trace gently over her lips, making them turn into an adorable smile.

"_I don't mind"_

He leaned down and gave her a soft kiss. _"How about some breakfast in bed?"_

"_I wouldn't say no to that" _she said, giving him a smile.

Jack carefully slipped out of bed and headed to the kitchen. He was planning on making a huge breakfast and placed everything he could think of on the kitchen counter. It didn't take long until he felt like he was being watched, making him glance up.

Kate was standing just a few steps away from him, with the cover wrapped securely around her body like a towel. Jack couldn't help but stare at her. The white sheet reached all down to the floor covering her pajama bottoms.

"_Hey, you were supposed to stay in the bed" _He said, giving her a disapproving look.

"_I missed you"_ she explained shyly.

Jack's expression at once softened and he gave her a warm smile.

Kate suddenly looked down at her feet, not really wanting to meet Jack's eyes. _"Are your parents coming today?" She asked nervously._

"_Why would my…"_ Jack started but stopped. He had completely forgotten that his parents were supposed to come visit him today and check in on him and his new apartment. They had agreed on that long before the fight though, so he wasn't sure they would show up now.

"_I don't know. I wouldn't bet on it"_ He said sounding rather depressed. Jack hated fighting with his parents, but this time he for once wouldn't come crawling back as he usually had to do. This time he would wait for them to come to him, no matter how long it would take.

Kate gave him an understanding nod, not hiding that fact that the answered had pleased her. It was no secret that Kate wasn't too fond of his parents.

"_Now, back to bed"_ Jack said after a few minutes passed, Kate still standing nearby watching him.

With a small smile, Kate turned around and went back to the bedroom.

It took a good 30 minutes until Jack reentered the bedroom, to find a sleeping Kate lying diagonally across the bed. Smiling to himself, he sat down on the bed and placed the tray next to him.

Jack leaned down and kissed Kate's lips softly making her open her eyes. He pulled away slowly, smiling at her.

"_I hope you're hungry"_ Jack said goofily, gesturing to the enormous tray of food he had placed on the bed.

Kate sat up with a shocked expression on her face. _"Who's gonna eat all that?"_ Kate asked with a smile on her lips.

"_Well you didn't eat much last night so I thought you could make up for it now" _

Kate smiled, then she reached forward and kissed him. Jack instantly deepened the kiss as his hands started to explore her body. Wrapping his arms around her he gently pushed them both back on the bed.

Worried that Kate would feel trapped lying underneath him, Jack managed to flip them over, without breaking their kiss, so that Kate was lying on top of him instead.

He moved one of his hands under her green top, pulling it up slightly, Kate's body at once tensed up and she broke the kiss.

She was about to speak as Jack silenced her with another kiss. After nearly a minute they had to break away from each other due to lack of oxygen. He could still taste Kate on his lips and smiled. Kate's eyes were glowing as she looked down at him, breathing rapidly. Pulling her down to him once more Jack captured her lips again. He deepened the kiss, exploring her mouth like it was a matter of life and death.

Kate suddenly placed her hands against his chest to get some distance between them. _"Jack…"_

He could hear in her voice that something was wrong. Jack placed a hand on her cheek reassuringly. _"What's wrong?" _He moved so that Kate was now lying next to him, facing him.

She was nibbling on her lower lip again, something that worried Jack since it was a clear sign that she was uncomfortable in some way. _"I'm not sure I'm ready to do this yet."_

"_I know"_ he simply answered her. "_Don't worry Kate, we won't do anything unless you feel completely sure you're ready to do it."_

He gave her a reassuring kiss on the forehead and then a tender one on her lips.

_"I'm glad I told you" _she whispered. _"About everything, so that you are willing to give me some time."_ Her eyes went up to meet his for the first time since she had started talking.

He was shocked to hear her say that. _"Please don't think I would have pushed you in to doing something you didn't want to…"_ Kate gave him an anxious look.

"_Kate, I would have given you all the time in the world if that was what you had needed" _he reassured her. _"Even if you hadn't told me why you needed it"_

She buried her face in his chest and he wrapped his arms protectively around her.

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please r&r :) 


	16. Grandma's Favorite

Thank you all review-leaving-people, feel special, cause you are the guys that are keeping the story alive ;)

Thank you Sonia for everything... and sorry for slowly turning you into an insomniac ;P

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Chapter Sixteen – Grandma's Favorite**

The morning had passed by quickly, not only had they managed to get curtains up in the bedroom, but the living room too. They had also eaten the enormous breakfast Jack had prepared and unpacked the last of the boxes.

Jack was about to take a shower while Kate was preparing dinner, when there was a loud knock on the apartment door. One hand on the bathroom door, Jack turned around and exchanged a look with Kate.

Jack took a deep breath as he walked over to the door and opened it slowly. _"Hi Mom."_

Margo forced a smile his way and stepped into the small apartment carrying her purse and a fancy shopping bag.

Jack stayed at the door, holding it open. _"Where's dad?"_ He asked, when a few seconds had past and no one else had appeared at the door.

"_He's working."_ His mother answered simply.

"_Oh"_ Closing the door, Jack walked over and took Margo's coat. _"So, do you want a tour of the apartment?"_ He asked, even though he knew his mother had seen the place a handful of times.

"_Yes, that would be nice."_ Margo said. Jack had had a feeling that would be her answer, after all she hadn't seen the place since all his stuff had been moved in.

Taking Margo around the small apartment trying to make small talk, was definitely not something Jack enjoyed. Jack could feel the tension rise the second they got closer to the kitchen area where Kate was standing.

"_Hello Kate"_ Margo said with a forced voice.

"_Hi Mrs. Shepard"_ Kate looked nervous as if she was waiting for Margo to start shouting at her. When all she received was a forced smile, Kate seemed to relax a little.

Jack had walked up next to Kate and was resting one of his hands protectively on her lower back. This was not overseen by his mother, who gave him a stern look.

Leaning down and giving Kate's hair a quick kiss, Jack led his mother over to the couch. After about half an hour of talking, mostly about the apartment, Kate called the two of them over for dinner. The three of them sat down in silence, eating the vegetarian lasagna Kate had made.

"_So how are you doing Kate?"_ Margo asked, breaking the silence, sounding unusually interested.

"_Uh… very well, thank you for asking."_ Kate exchanged a puzzled look with Jack.

Jack forced down a chuckle. The conversation sounded so unnatural, fake almost. At least it was going smooth. Jack had been afraid the women would have started throwing china at each other.

"_Are you going to keep the baby?"_ The older woman suddenly asked, looking directly at the young couple.

Kate looked shocked at the question, letting her eyes drop to her plate.

Jack immediately noticed how uncomfortable Kate appeared to be. _"Mom…"_ Jack warned the older woman.

"_What? It's a very important question. I take for granted that you have discussed this already!" _Margo said defensively, giving her son an almost callous look.

"_Mom, that is none of your business"_ Jack said, trying to sound as calm as possible. He could feel how close this discussion was to turning in to a screaming and yelling fight.

"_None of my business?"_ Margo exclaimed.

"_No! That is none of your business! We're not discussing this with you. Do you understand?"_ Jack said more firmly, giving his mother a threatening look.

There was a flash of rage in Margo's eyes. Jack knew that there was no turning back now. _"It's none of my business if my only son ruins his life?" _the older woman shouted.

"_I'm not ruining my life Ma!"_ Jack said defensively.

"_You don't see the big picture here Jack. You still don't get the consequences and that in itself is a clear sign that you're not old enough for this."_ Margo turned to Kate_. "And you. Well, let's just say I'm thankful you're not 'my' daughter." _There was a tone of disgust in her voice.

Kate pressed her lips tight together, looking down shamefully at her plate. Jack placed his hand tenderly on her knee under the table, letting her know he was right there.

"_Mom, leave Kate out of this" _Jack didn't sound as angry anymore, he sounded exhausted, as if they had been fighting for hours.

"_Leave her out of this? Jack, I hope you do realize that the problem here is Kate"_

"_I am right here!"_ Kate suddenly exclaimed, apparently getting frustrated by Margo's way of talking, like she wasn't present in the room.

"_Unfortunately"_ Margo said angrily back to the girl.

Kate stood up without another word and walked to the bedroom and shut the door loudly.

"_That's enough"_ Jack said firmly, standing up as well. _"I don't know what your problem is mom, but I want your support, and I want it right now!"_

He never thought that his mother would act this way. He understood that from her point of view the situation probably didn't look very good, but he really thought she would let it go and support him. Even if she wouldn't, he never thought she would act so unreasonable, after all her grandchild hadn't done anything wrong and was really innocent in the whole thing.

Jack had almost forgotten the fact that the baby wouldn't actually be his mother's grandchild. But she still didn't know that, Jack thought miserably to himself.

Margo tilted her head up and gave him a distressed look_. "Jack I want to support you, I do. But you're shutting me out!"_ Margo's voice was suddenly soft and caring. Jack knew deep down that she meant what she said. He and his mother had always had a close relationship, rarely disagreeing on anything. But he wouldn't forgive her that easily. She had no right to just barge in there and treat him and Kate his way.

When Jack didn't reply, Margo let her eyes drop to the table. _"Maybe it wasn't such a great idea to come here."_ Margo said quietly, as she rose from her seat.

She walked over to the front door without another word, took her coat down from the coat rack and lazily hung it over her shoulders.

Turning to face her son, she gave him an apologizing smile. _"Jack, I know I said some things that weren't fair to either you or Kate. I'm just really worried about you and you keep me in the dark about everything. For what it's worth, I'm sorry."_

Jack gave her a small nod, with a blank emotionless look on his face. Just as she was about to leave Jack handed over the shopping bag she had arrived with, only to have her shake her head at him.

The words _"Keep it" _was the last thing Jack heard before the door closed in front of him.

He glanced down in the bag and saw a brown teddy bear. Lifting it out of the bag, he couldn't help smiling to himself. 'Grandma's Favorite' was printed across the fury toy's stomach.

Carefully placing the bear back in the bag, he placed it on the floor next to the door and walked over to the bedroom.

Kate was sitting on the edge of the bed, staring at her hands which she had placed in her lap.

"_Kate... I'm so sorry about my mother. She didn't really mean everything she said out there."_

When she didn't answer, Jack stepped closer and kneeled down on the floor in front of her, taking her hands in his.

"_I don't want to keep the baby"_ she divulged quietly, looking past Jack.

"_If this is about my mom, I don't-"_

Kate interrupted him, looking directly at him. _"No, it has nothing to do with your mother. I just don't want to keep the baby"_

Jack just starred at her. She didn't want the baby? Was this the way she had been feeling the whole time? How couldn't he have noticed? He kicked himself mentally, remembering everything he had said and done concerning the baby, a baby she didn't want.

"_It's not that I don't want the baby. I just can't have 'his' baby."_

Kate started crying _"I can't…" _Jack moved and sat down on the bed next to her, still holding her hands in his. _"I feel sick just thinking about the fact that something that's a part of him is growing inside of me…"_ Her voice was full of disgust. She looked down in her lap or possibly at her stomach, Jack wasn't sure which. Her voice turned in to a sobbing whisper. _"I just can't do this Jack."_

"_Shh, it's okay. Whatever you decide to do, I'm there for you"_ Jack said soothingly, gently stroking her hands with his fingers.

Kate was shaking her head softly from side to side. _"I can't...I just don't want to carry this baby…"_

Jack had moved his hands up her arms, now resting them on her shoulder. _"It's okay" _He reassured her once more.

"_I'm sorry. I just can't do this…"_ Kate sobbed, biting nervously on her lower lip.

"_Don't apologize Kate. It's okay… It's all up to you…"_

Kate tilted her head up to meet his eyes. _"I'm still sorry.. I know you were all excited about the baby."_ She said softly, a tone of sadness still audible in her voice.

Jack blushed. He had been pretty excited about the baby. He had talked about the baby a lot, not to mention planned the nearest future around the baby.

Placing his hand tenderly on her cheek, he stroked away a tear with his thumb. _"I promise I'll be just as excited the next time you're pregnant, ok?" _Jack said with a grin.

Kate tilted her head and smiled at him, giving him a small nod. _"Deal"_

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Please make my day and leave a review :) 


	17. Knock Knock, Who’s There?

Thanks for the reviews :) glad you still like the story ppl :)

and thx to Max, Lara and Sam, plus anyone I might have tricked into beta reading this ;p

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**Chapter Seventeen – Knock Knock, Who's There?**

The afternoon passed by just as fast as the morning had. Jack had talked Kate into taking a long warm bath, trying to get her to relax a bit. It had been almost an hour now, so he guessed she would come back out of the bathroom any second.

Jack sighed loudly and put down the cordless phone on the table in front of him. Grabbing a pen, he carelessly wrote down 'Monday, 2 pm' on the back of a receipt that was lying on the table. He had finally managed to get Kate an appointment at a clinic.

Feeling a bit unsure if they would actually let her do an abortion without her parents consent since she was under aged, Jack had called and asked, getting the answer that there was no law that required neither consent nor notification of the parents. Jack was very grateful for the answer since he knew that back in Ohio the law required consent or notification to either Diane or Sam Austin.

Glancing over at the bathroom door, Jack grabbed the phone again and ordered some Chinese food for them to eat. Without having a takeout menu, he hoped he had managed to order something eatable.

Just as he placed the phone back on the table for the second time, Kate stepped out of the bathroom wearing a bathrobe.

"_Hey beautiful, did you have a nice bath?"_ Jack said softly, walking over to the brunette.

"_Yeah it was great"_ Kate answered a bit groggily without meeting his eyes, as she tried to untangle her wet curly hair with her fingers.

Jack gently tilted her head with one of his hands and smiled lovingly at her when their eyes locked. Glancing down at his navy blue bathrobe she was wearing, Jack grinned at her.

"_This looks way better on you than is does on me"_ Jack said jokingly, fingering slightly on the lazily tied knot Kate had made, holding the robe together.

Kate let out a nervous chuckle. _"I hope its okay that I borrowed it"_

"_Of course"_ Jack said, leaning down giving her a tender kiss.

A loud knock on the door made them pull apart.

"_That's the Chinese food."_

"_Oh great, I'm starving! I'll just get dressed."_ Kate announced, spinning around and paced over to the bedroom.

Jack opened the door, surprised to find his friend Marc Silverman standing there, instead of a small Chinese guy.

"_Dude, you gonna let me in or what?"_ Marc joked and walked past Jack into the apartment.

"_Hi… What are you doing here?"_ It had come out a bit harsh. To be true Jack was really glad to see Marc. They had been friends forever, and he was the only one of his friends that he actually liked spending time with, except for Kate of course.

Kate.

Jack glanced over at the bedroom door. Alright, Marc didn't really have a problem with Kate, Jack told himself. But he would prefer if the evening didn't turn into a debate. He'd had enough of that this morning. Hopefully she wouldn't come out until he had gotten rid of Marc.

"_Place looks great"_ He announced, ignoring Jack's question. Looking around expectantly in the room, Marc tossed a bag on the floor.

"_Jack, I hope you didn't order any_-" Kate froze in the doorway when she noticed Marc, whom had an even more surprised look on his face.

Jack felt like rolling his eyes. Great. Opening his mouth to say something, Jack just closed it again, unsure what to say.

Marc turned, facing Jack. _"Kate's here…"_ His voice sounded as if he informed Jack about something he wasn't aware of.

"_Yeah, I've kinda noticed that."_ Jack answered in an amused voice

"_Hi Marc"_ Kate greeted, looking a bit self-conscious, drawing the bathrobe tighter around her body.

"_Hey"_ Marc greeted back, still looking puzzled by the fact that she was indeed standing there.

Another loud knock interrupted them, making Jack head over to the front door. _"Well 'that' is probably the Chinese food."_

Kate slipped back into the bedroom without another word, just as Jack closed the door behind the Chinese delivery man.

"_So… You and Kate…"_ Marc said sounding both a bit amused and surprised, following Jack as he walked over to the kitchen.

"_Yeah, me and Kate"_ Jack simply said, grinning back at Marc.

Marc looked like he was trying to progress the information. _"Does Tom know?" _

"_No, but they've broken up." _Jack explained, handing over three plats to Marc.

Placing them on the table Marc turned back to face Jack. _"Apparently a lot happened while I was in Boston."_ There was a teasing look on his face.

Jack just smiled at him, glad Marc wasn't making a huge deal out of it.

Just as the boys had placed glasses, cutleries and napkins on the table as well, Kate reappeared, now fully dressed.

Jack held on the back of a chair, indicating for Kate to sit down on it. Pushing Kate's chair in slightly, Jack sat down next to her on the opposite side to Marc.

"_Well dig in"_ Jack said, gesturing for Marc to start.

After eating for a few minutes in silence, Kate cleared her throat.

"_So Marc, how was Boston?"_

Marc looked up and gave her a polite smile. "_Great, my cousin took me all over the city. It'll be nice to get back home tomorrow though."_

"_Oh... you're planning on spending the night here in New York?"_ Jack asked a bit hesitantly.

Marc gave his friend a worried look. _"Dude, it's like a 7 hour drive back home."_

"_Right, of course you planned on staying."_ Jack said stupidly, sounding a bit apologizing.

"_That's not a problem is it?" _Marc asked a bit concerned.

"_No of course not."_ Kate answered, glaring questioningly at Jack, obviously wondering what the heck he was doing.

When the trio had eaten Jack put the plates in the sink and was now standing in front of the open refrigerator. _"Do you want a beer?"_

His question was replied with a simple nod from Marc. Glancing over at Kate, Jack gestured for the fridge. _"Do you want something to drink too?"_

Kate smiled at him shaking her head slightly. _"No thanks. I'm gonna go to bed, and leave you two to catch up."_

Jack walked up to Kate, handing Marc the beer on the way. Placing one of his hands on Kate's back, he drew her closer and captured her lips with his. Pulling away slightly, he mumbled 'good night' against her lips, before kissing her tenderly again.

Marc cleared his throat making the couple separate, both looking rather flushed. _"Good night Kate"_ Marc grinned, giving her a polite nod.

"_Good night"_ The brunette answered bashfully, walking off to the bedroom.

They guys had moved over to the couch, both finished with their beer.

"_So she, like lives here?"_ Marc asked curiously, looking at the bedroom door into where Kate had disappeared maybe 15 minutes earlier.

"_Yup"_ Jack answered simply, smiling a bit at the fact.

Marc glanced over at Jack, and hit him lightly on the shoulder. _"I can't believe you didn't tell me…"_

"_Well, she kind of moved in yesterday. You know, at the same time that I moved in myself."_ Jack said jokingly, with a tone of arrogance in his voice.

"_Still... can't believe you didn't tell me."_ The brown haired man smirked as he rose from the couch.

Marc went to get the bag that he had carelessly thrown on the floor in the hallway. Grabbing it hastily he accidentally knocked over the shopping bag Margo had left there earlier the same day.

_  
"Dude…"_

Jack turned around at the sound of his friend's voice. Marc was holding his bag with one hand and the brown teddy bear in the other, holding it up so Jack clearly could see it.

Damn it. Why hadn't he put that stupid bag in the bedroom? Jack thought to himself.

_"Please tell me it's not that it looks like."_ Marc begged, sounding very alert.

"_It's not what it looks like"_ Jack said simply and truthfully.

Marc gave him a 'yeah right' look. _"Oh yeah? Care to explain then?"_

Jack smirked at him, standing up as well. _"Not really."_ Walking over to Marc he grabbed the bear and the bag and placed them back in the hallway.

"_So there is not a little Shepard on the way?"_ Marc said with a smug look on his face.

Jack hesitated with his answer. Should he lie? Would saying 'no' be lying, or telling the truth? He suddenly felt confused. She was going to have an abortion either way, no real point in telling anyone anything.

"_C'mon Shep, it's a simple question. Is she pregnant or not?"_ Marc asked impatiently.

It was a rather simple question, and she was pregnant. Jack exhaled loudly, giving his friend a defeated look which was followed by a faint nod.

"_Oh my God! Wow. That's just … wow."_ Marc said thrilled.

Jack just responded with a small smile.

"_Your mom is apparently all excited"_ Marc said, gesturing to the teddy bear.

"_Actually, that's more of a peace offering."_ Jack answered sounding a bit depressed.

Marc made an understanding and sympathetic 'oh' sound.

Hearing vague noises from the bedroom, Jack turned his head to the door. Jack immediately identified the sounds as Kate tossing and turning on the bed.

Marc was watching him curiously as he just stared at the bedroom door.

"_You know, I think I'm gonna go to bed."_ Jack suddenly announced, giving his friend an apologizing look.

Marc gave him an understanding but curious nod, obviously aware of the hushed noises too.

Jack handed over the blankets and pillow he had been close to using the night before and headed off to the bedroom.

Jack instantly noticed that Kate was wearing one of his t-shirts. Smiling to himself, he tossed his jeans and the shirt he had worn, to a chair nearby.

Kate had twisted herself into the sheets, making faint movements to get untangled. Kate's expression suddenly changed from blank to anxious, making Jack desperately wanting to wake her up.

"_Kate"_ He tried softly, running his hand gently up and down her arm.

The brunette stirred slightly and opened her eyes tiredly, looking both disoriented and scared.

Jack gently lay down next to her and placed his arm protectively around her. _"It's okay. It was just a dream."_ he said soothingly.

Jack felt Kate turn to face him and slipped her arms around his waist. Within minutes they were both sleeping peacefully holding on tightly to each other.

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since you read the whole thing and all, why not leave a review... ;) 


	18. A World Full of Tshirts

_New chapter for my devoted readers!_

_Thanks to my betasistah :) and to Max, Sammy, Amy, Ally, Jessa and my brother who all help me when I get stuck on something :)_

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**Chapter Eighteen – A World Full of T-shirts**

Jack woke up to an empty bed, immediately feeling worried by the fact that Kate was nowhere to be seen. Not even bothering to put some clothes on, Jack paced to the living room.

Glancing over at the couch, Jack saw that Marc was still fast asleep. He had at some point during the night kicked the blanket off, which was now lying next to the couch on the floor.

Turning towards the kitchen area, Jack let out a breath of relief. Kate was sitting curled up on one of the kitchen chairs, nibbling on a cracker. Walking up from behind her, Jack placed his hands gently on her shoulders and leaned down to kiss her cheek.

"_Hi"_ Kate greeted quietly, leaning her head down enough to rest it on one of Jack's hands.

"_You okay?"_ Jack asked softly, sounding concerned.

Kate shifted slightly on the chair, glancing over at Marc, before turning towards Jack. Hesitating a bit with her answer, she finally whispered, _"Yeah"_

Jack took a quick look at the couch, giving an accepting nod. Okay, so she didn't want to talk in front of Marc, he could understand that.

Giving one of Kate's shoulders a light squeeze, Jack went over to the coffee maker which was neatly placed on the kitchen counter. "_Do you want some coffee?"_ Jack asked quietly, not to wake up his sleeping guest.

Kate gave him a perplexed look, before shaking her head as a no.

Stupid question, Jack thought to himself. She normally didn't drink coffee and even if she wasn't planning on going through with the whole pregnancy, Kate wouldn't do anything to hurt a potential baby growing inside of her.

Turning on the coffeemaker, Jack turned around again to face the brunette. _"Are you hungry?"_

Kate shrugged but stood up, indicating that she'd help him get breakfast ready.

Jack set the table, constantly watching Kate in the corner of his eye as she looked through one of the cupboards. She was still just wearing his T-shirt, which suddenly didn't look very big on her considering how short it was. For being as short as she was, Kate did have amazing long legs, Jack thought to himself, letting his eyes travel up and down her slightly tanned legs.

Kate unexpectedly turned around and Jack knew he had been caught.

"_What are you doing?"_ Kate asked mischievously, grinning widely at him, obviously very aware of what he had been doing.

Jack let out a chuckle, giving her a clueless and innocent look.

Placing a box of cereals on the table, Jack saw the note he had written the day before, concerning Kate's visit to the abortion clinic.

"_I got you your appointment."_ Jack said softly, handing the note over to Kate.

"_Thank you"_ Kate said a bit bashfully, taking the note.

"_Tomorrow?"_ She asked sounding almost confused, after reading the note.

"_Yeah" _Jack answered proudly. It hadn't been easy to get an appointment that soon.

Kate let her eyes fall back down to the note, obviously troubled by something. Jack immediately picked up on the change in her expression.

Moving closer, he carefully placed a hand on her shoulder. _"What's wrong?"_

"_I just thought you'd go with me"_ Kate said shyly, looking up at him with a vulnerable look on her face.

Jack gave her a reassuring smile. Did she really think he wasn't going with her? _"I will. I'll be done at the university around noon."_ He explained, leaning down and giving her a loving kiss.

"_I wouldn't dream of letting you go by yourself." _Jack mumbled against her mouth, feeling Kate place her arms around his neck, drawing her body closer to his. Jack deepened the kiss, letting his whole body be overtaken by the passion. Clinging desperately to each other, they were both trying to press their bodies closer together.

Kate moaned into his mouth, making Jack even more eager to feel her body against his. But Jack knew they had to stop, for so many reasons. The most obvious one, Marc was sleeping just a few feet away from them.

Kate's tongue suddenly made Marc feel like a very blurry obstacle. Within seconds, Jack had gently pushed Kate up again the kitchen wall, still kissing her hungrily. His hand behind her neck, pressing her deeper into their kiss, whilst the other one was traveling up the side of her naked leg.

Kate whimpered in delight as he started tracing kisses down her neck. Jack just couldn't get enough of her, the taste of her skin and the lustful look in her eyes or the sounds that escaped her lips when he touched her.

Jack felt himself tremble as the brunette slid her fingers down his bare chest, softly letting her nails dig into his skin.

Jack felt completely powerless to her touch, unable to stop her as her hands continued to travel south. But when Kate started fiddle with the waistband of his boxers, Jack knew it was without doubt time to stop.

Pulling away reluctantly, Jack reached down and stopped Kate's hands. _"Don't…"_ He whispered, breathing heavily, trying to sound as firm as he could.

Kate let her eyes fall down to their now entangled hands. Suddenly looking stunned by what they had been doing, Kate shamefully tried to take a step back only to slam into the wall behind her.

"_Kate…" _He tried carefully, squeezing her hands, worried about the expression that was on her face. Jack noticed that her breathing was just as uneven as his own and that her eyes were looking at anything but him.

When the girl tilted her head up to meet his eyes, Jack could see that her cheeks had turned to a nice crimson color, making her look even more adorable than before.

Kate let out a nervous laughter, and grinned at him slightly, before letting her eyes drop to the floor again.

Jack grinned himself, glad that it wasn't weird or tensed between them. Tilting her head back up with one of his hands, he leaned down and kissed her again. _"You know, you really shouldn't walk around in just a T-shirt" _Jack teased, as he pulled away.

Kate glanced down at his black boxers and chuckled _"Says the one, who's just wearing boxers."_

Jack gave her a mischievous look, telling her that she would regret that comment. Kate just gave him a daring smile, as he leaned down closer to her again.

"_Says the one who less than 1o seconds ago tried to get me out of them." _whispered Jack, seductively in her ear.

Kate blushed ever more and made a faint giggling sound which was interrupted by Marc clearing his throat.

Glancing to his left, Jack received a questioning look from his male friend. It probably did look rather suspicious since both him and Kate were both very easily dressed and still standing up against the wall.

"_We're just-"_ Jack started to explain, but immediately got cut off.

"_Wooh! Really don't want to know"_ Marc said humorously, holding his hands up as in defense"

Jack gave him a quick nod, taking Kate's hand in his and walked over to where Marc was standing.

"_Are we going to have some breakfast or what?"_ Marc asked impatiently, gesturing to the already set table.

Kate had declined the breakfast invitation and sneaked off, leaving the boys alone in the kitchen. Catching up a bit more about Marc's plan for the upcoming year, they had decided to take a quick tour of New York City before Marc had to go back home.

After clearing the table in a rush, Jack walked up to the bathroom door and knocked gently on it. _"Kate, are you decent?"_

"_I'm in the shower"_ a faint voice answered from the other side of the door.

"_Can I come in?"_ Jack asked, realizing just as the words left his mouth that the question sounded rather blunt.

When there was no answer, Jack quickly made a new approach.

"_Marc and I are heading out, I just need to shave. I'll be really quick, I promise"_

"_Uhm… sure."_ She definitely didn't sound sure, making Jack consider not entering the room.

Jack placed his hand on the door handle, turning it slowly, as he had thought the door was unlocked. Kate rarely locked any door, since a locked door meant confinement.

Stepping inside the small bathroom, he got a cloud of steam in his face.

Looking over at the shower curtain, he could make out the contour of Kate's body. He let his eyes travel over the light blue drape, unable to think of anything but the fact that a very naked Kate was just a couple of feet away from him.

Kate's voice suddenly interrupted his thoughts. _"I can see you, you know"_ She sounded a little embarrassed but at the same time amused.

Jack let out a nervous chuckle and tore his eyes away, settling them on the bathroom cabinet in front of him.

Not even half through with his shaving, Jack became aware of the fact that the sound of pouring water had disappeared.

"_Jack could you hand me-" _

Before she had a chance to finish, Jack handed her the white towel that had law neatly folded behind him.

"_Thanks" _Kate said as she reached out with one of her arms from behind the drape and grabbed it.

Jack turned his attention back to the mirror in front of him, just as Kate stepped out from behind the shower curtain wrapped in the towel.

Be smart Jack, he told himself, keep your eyes where they are. After all he had kind of pushed it a bit to be in the bathroom at all, it wouldn't help the situation if he ogled Kate's half naked body.

Kate was watching him carefully, following ever move he made as he shaved. Jack grinned, obviously aware of being watched, glanced at Kate's reflection in the mirror.

Kate blushed and gave him an adorable smile before reaching for a hairbrush. Kate took a couple of steps past Jack and positioned herself in front of the full body mirror that was on the door, brushing her hair cautiously.

Jack noticed in the corner of his eye that Kate turned from one side to the other in front of the mirror.

"_I think I'm starting to show"_ Kate suddenly divulged concerned, placing a hand on her stomach, holding the hairbrush with the other.

"_You're like 5 weeks pregnant…" _Jack said with an amused chuckle as he placed his razor back in the cabinet.

"_So…?"_ Kate gave him an unimpressed look. _"Seriously, look"_

Jack took a step closer to the brunette and gently placed his hand on her stomach. Even with the fluffy towel wrapped around her body, her stomach was perfectly flat. Jack moved his hand slightly, pretending to inspect her stomach closely.

"_Maybe you're just getting fat" _Jack joked as he started to tickle her stomach instead, making Kate taking a quick step back to get away.

"_Not cool!"_ Kate warned after him, unable to suppress a giggle.

Jack just gave her an innocent grin before leaving the bathroom.

Stepping back out to the living room, Marc gave him a mischievous look. _"Well that took forever"_

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_r&r ;)_


	19. Blueberry Pie Anyone

_all my love to Sonia, Sammy, Amy and Max.. plus everyone else that keep helping me :)_

_new chapter..._

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Chapter Nineteen – Blueberry Pie Anyone? **

It had been several hours since he left the apartment. He felt slightly bad for leaving Kate alone for so long. He'd had a great time with Marc though, catching up on things. Marc had always understood him and usually supported his decisions in life. Considering the situation he was in, he really needed a sympathetic friend.

They had strolled around town for hours just talking, mostly about Jack and Kate. He hadn't actually told Marc all the facts. He had left out an important detail, namely that the baby wasn't his. But it didn't feel like that would have mattered that much, their conversation would probably have been pretty much the same anyway.

"_I'm back"_ Jack informed loudly as he entered the apartment. At once he regretted that he had announced it so loudly in case Kate was resting.

But he as soon as he closed the door behind him, Kate greeted him from the kitchen area. _"Hey"_

Pacing over quickly to where she was standing, Jack folded his arms around her smaller body, bring her in to a tight hug.

"_Did you have a good time with Marc?"_

"_The best"_ Jack answer simply, glancing around the kitchen. It looked like a complete mess. What could she possibly have done in here in the few hours he had been out?

"_I'm glad"_ Kate said, giving him a genuine smile.

"_What's that?"_ Jack suddenly asked delightfully, inhaling loudly through his nose, obviously smelling something in the air. Looking around curiously, Jack tried to find the source.

"_Oh, I made a pie" _Kate said proudly, sounding as if she just remembered it herself. Kate moved a little, revealing the pie that was right behind her on the counter.

Jack gave her an amused smile, looking directly at the pastry. _"You made a pie?"_

Letting out a nervous chuckle, Kate blushed slightly. _"Yeah, blueberry"_

"_I thought you said I wouldn't be able to turn you into my mother?" _Jack asked, sounding very amused.

"_Call me mom one single time, even by mistake and I will kick your ass."_ Kate warned with a smirk but still in a serious tone.

Jack leaned down and kissed her passionately on the lips. _"Trust me, I don't want to turn you in to my mom" _He said, with a playful wink.

Pulling away, Jack noticed that she looked completely exhausted. Jack placed a hand of concern on Kate's cheek. _"You look tried, are you alright?"_

"_Yeah, I'm fine"_ Kate replied automatically, closing her eyes briefly.

"_Why don't you go rest for a while and I'll clean up in here."_ Jack offered lovingly, gesturing for Kate to go to the bedroom.

Giving him a defeated look and a small nod, Kate left the messy kitchen.

Cleaning up had taken longer than Jack had thought. But when he finally was done he had walked over to the bedroom door, opening it slowly not to wake Kate. Stepping inside the bedroom, he saw the brunette lying on the queen size bed. The lights were off, but the window let the daylight lit up the room in a welcoming and warm way. Jack could tell that Kate wasn't sleeping, her eyes were open and she was staring directly at the white ceiling.

Jack felt a chill go through his body. She reminded him of a lifeless corpse, especially since she hadn't done anything to indicate that she was aware of his presence.

"_Hey"_ He said quietly, hoping desperately that she would answer, letting him know that she was indeed alive and let him push any thoughts indication anything else out of his head.

When no answer came, Jack moved over to the bed and lay down next to her. Close enough to reach her but still on a fair distance. He could see that her chest was rising and falling, which had a very calming effect on him since it indicated that she was breathing.

He let his left elbow support the weight of his upper body, while his right hand had found its way to Kate's hair, playing with one of her chocolate curls.

Neither one of them said anything, but it still felt like they were having a serious conversation. He knew that she was working through things in her head, dealing, in her own way. Hopefully his presence was helping her and not making her uncomfortable.

Kate suddenly inhaled rapidly and turned to her side, facing Jack. Seeing a tear on her cheek, Jack gave her a weak sympathetic smile and gently stroked it away with his thumb. Kate let out a suppressed sob and closed her eyes tightly to prevent more tears from escaping her eyes.

Jack could tell that it wasn't working, seeing the small drops of sadness creping down her cheeks. Jack pulled her against him, but it only seemed to make her start cry even harder.

"_Please talk to me Kate"_ Jack begged softly. It killed him that she didn't open up to him, he accepted it, but that pain caused by her shutting him out was eating him up from the inside. There were a lot of things they needed to talk about. Not just concerning the baby, but the fact that they had taken a big step in their relationship, moving them off the platonic safety of friendship. He knew that that discussion would probably have to wait for awhile though, at the moment the baby was the issue they had to focus on.

"_I called Tom today… when you were out with Marc." _Kate divulged, not meeting his eyes.

Not the topic Jack would have wished, but at least she was sharing something from inside her head with him.

"_I told him it wasn't his baby."_ Kate said quietly. If Jack hadn't known better, he'd say that she was ashamed by the fact. Her voice was cold but at the same time very fragile.

"_He got pretty upset and then he said he was happy that the baby wasn't his."_ Kate glanced up to meet his eyes, suppressing another sob.

Jack knew she was leaving out parts of the conversation. He wondered if it was because she didn't want him to know, or if she just didn't want to retell the things Tom had said.

Considering if he should say something, Jack just held her close, knowing that it probably meant more than anything he could come up with saying.

Jack glanced over at the watch on the nightstand behind Kate. It had been almost 15 minutes since she had gone quiet. Jack was about to untangle himself from Kate, believing that she had fallen sleep.

"_Still can't believe that I'm actually pregnant"_ Kate whispered, just as Jack had loosen his grip around her and moved enough to be able to see her face again.

Jack gazed in to Kate's green eyes, his plans of leaving the bed long gone. Her eyes were empty, like she was far away thinking about something else. _"It's like its never going to sink in."_ Kate continued, gently placing one of her hands on his chest.

That was something that worried him. That she was determined to have an abortion before letting the pregnancy really sink in.

"_It's understandable."_ Jack whispered back, unable to think of something else to say.

Letting out a sound that Jack registered as a sigh, Kate looked directly into his eyes.

"_Thought the whole point of birth control was that you wouldn't get pregnant."_ Kate said jokingly, with a weak smile that didn't reach her eyes

Jack let out a fake chuckle, not really feeling amused by the remark. Letting the comment sink in, if anything, it maybe him feel sick. Pulling Kate closer again, he rested his head gently on hers.

"_Useless pills"_ Kate muttered quietly into his shoulder.

Pills? Kate had been on birth control? She slept with Tom once, started fighting with him and had then regularly continued to take birth control? How did that make sense, Jack asked himself confused.

Propping himself back up on his elbow Jack looked down questioningly on Kate. _"Why were you taking birth control pills?"_ The second the question left his mouth and he heard the words out loud, he realized the answer was right in front of him. 'This' was the reason, it had nothing to do with Tom. She had been on the pill to prevent this from happening. It had not been a one time thing, Jack thought miserably to himself. This had been something Kate regularly had been trying to prevent.

Jack knew Kate wouldn't answer the question. He could tell from the look in her eyes that she knew that he had already figured out the answer.

She let him embrace her, probably more for his comfort than her own.

Burying his face her hair, Jack closed his eyes and swallowed a sob.

"_How long have you been on the pill Kate?" _Jack asked huskily, knowing that he had asked one question, but was waiting for the answer to a completely different one. He needed to know. He needed to have some kind of assumption to what she'd been through.

"_Couple of years... It's been going on longer than that though"_ Kate faintly confessed, with an emotionless voice.

How long? He could feel the question on his lips, but he forced it back. He didn't actually want to know. It was enough to know that it had been longer than two years.

"_I'm sorry I didn't tell you. "_ Kate said barely audible, her voice full of misery.

"_It's okay"_ Jack reassured her, pulling her even closer, wanting to make sure she knew that he was right there.

Kate had started crying softly, burying her face in his shirt._ "I wanted to tell you, I really did. So many times… I just wanted to let you hold me and hear you promise me it would never happen again."_

"_I'm so sorry I didn't do that"_ Jack whispered as he felt a tear of pain and sadness slide down his cheek

"_I'm sorry I didn't give you a chance to do that"_ Kate whispered back.

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_please review :)_


	20. Don't Judge A Book By Its Cover

_New chappy!_

_Ive just realized that like 90 percent of this_ _fic is spent in bed :D i havnt got any complains about that yet tho... :p_

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**Chapter Twenty – Don't Judge a Book by its Cover**

Kate had been sleeping for almost an hour. She had snuggled herself closer to jack, pressing her whole body against his. Her head law lazily on his arm, her beautiful brown curls spread out over both his shoulder and the pillow. Jack had changed position as soon as Kate had fallen sleep, now lying on his side watching the brunette sleep.

He had intended to leave when she had drifted off into the dream world, but he didn't have the heart to entangle himself from her arms and leave her alone.

She looked unusually peacefully, considering the conversation they had just had. There was a hint of an adorable smile on her lips.

Jack wondered when Kate had transformed from the cute little girl she used to be, into this beautiful young woman who was lying next to him. Letting his fingertips softly stroke Kate's upper arm, Jack leaned down and placed a gentle kiss on her forehead.

Jack watched the brunette sleep for 15 more minutes until she started to move, eyes opening slowly.

Jack had propped himself up on is elbow. Hovering slightly over Kate, he let his hand cup her face, caressing her cheek with his thumb.

When Kate opened her eyes completely she smiled sweetly up at him. Moving one of her hands to his chest, Jack got the feeling she would push him away, but she just lingered her hand on him, softly tugging on the fabric.

Jack edged closer to the girl, letting their legs entangle. Jack moved his hands to her waist and pulled her further down on the bed. The action made Kate give him a nervous look which he quickly wiped away as he leaned down and softly kissed her lips.

Balancing himself over her, Jack held himself up with his hands, not wanting to crush her with his full weight. Tracing kisses down her jaw line down towards her neck and collarbone. He gently traced his fingers over her shoulder, carefully moving the strap of her top to the side. Leaning downward, he kissed the skin that had seconds earlier been covered with the soft fabric.

Jack reached back up to her face and gave her one final kiss before pressing his temple to hers. Gazing in to Kate's hazel green eyes, Jack felt like he was losing all awareness to the surrounding world.

When Kate closed her eyes tiredly, Jack lay back down on his side, his arms firmly around her waist. His eyelids were feeling a bit heavier too. As he stretched out slightly on the bed, Jack considered getting up to take off his jeans. He really didn't feel like sleeping in his clothes, especially not today since he had to get some proper sleep and get up early the next morning.

"_Do you think it'll hurt?"_ Kate suddenly asked quietly, breaking the silence.

Jack lifted his head slightly from the pillow to look at her in confusion,

Kate shifted uncomfortable and tilted her head to meet his eyes. _"Tomorrow, do you think it'll hurt?"_

"_No."_ Jack answered confidently, giving her a reassuring look. _"You're not very far along so you'll probably have a chemical abortion."_

Kate nodded slowly, looking like she was taking the words in. After a few seconds she glanced back up at Jack with an anxious look on her face. _"What exactly does that mean?"_

Jack gave her a small smile. _"That they'll give you drugs and send you back home." _His voice was almost playful, as if he had told a child something obvious.

"_Oh. No knives then?"_ Kate said jokingly, but Jack could tell from the slightly trembling in her voice, that she wasn't that amused herself by the comment.

Letting out a soft chuckle, Jack gave her a reassuring smile. _"Nope. No knives."_ Jack promised, moving a little closer to the brunette, wrapping a protective arm around her smaller body.

They law in silence for a while until Jack propped himself up on his elbow again, looking down at Kate who was lying flat on her back.

"_Tomorrow, I thought maybe you could pick me up at the university when I'm done."_

Kate gave him a playful smile._ "Okay, do you want me to walk you to school too?" _

Jack was glad that she seemed to be in a happier mood. Smiling down at her, Jack made an expression as if he was considering her proposition. _"No that okay, I'll take the bus with the other kids"_ He finally answered as he leaned down and placed a soft kiss right next to her earlobe.

Kate giggled, pushing playfully on Jack's chest, trying to make him stop.

Jack started tracing butterfly kisses down cheek and finally gave her a tender kiss on the lips. Kate had wrapped her arms around his body, slowly responding to his actions, nibbling softly on his lower lip. Neither one of them deepened the kisses, both feeling perfectly satisfied by just exchanging small pecks.

Jack could feel Kate tighten her grip around him as he slowly pulled away. _"Kate, about tomorrow…"_ Jack said hesitantly. Kate's eyes became unfocused, a clear sign for Jack that she didn't want to talk about it.

He knew it was a sensible subject for her. But he had to ask, he wouldn't be able to live with himself if he didn't, and she regretted the fact that she had had the abortion later on.

"_Are you sure you want to go through with this?" _Jack saw that Kate was about to respond, but he gently placing a hand on her arm and continued before she had a chance to do so.

"_I just don't want you to regret this decision later. And if you are sure and you definitely want to do this, I'll respect that and I'll support you in any way I can."_ Jack said promisingly, searching for something in Kate's eyes.

"_It's not that I don't want to have a baby."_ Kate said painfully, breaking eye contact with Jack. _"It's just that I'm so scared…"_ Her voice trailed off into a sob.

Jack gently pulled Kate and himself up into a sitting position on the bed. _"Why? What is it that you're so afraid of?"_

Nibbling on her lower lip, Kate let her gaze fall to her lap. "_If I decided to keep the baby, I'm just terrified that every time I saw it, I would be reminded of Wayne."_

"_What if I had the baby and wouldn't be able to love him?"_ Jack could see the devastated look in her face as he glanced up to meet his eyes. He had also noted the fact that Kate for the first time just had referred to the baby as 'him'.

Jack gently took both of Kate's hands in his. _"No, Kate, listen to me. I know with certainty that you would love your baby, eternally." _His voice was full of love and made a small smile appear on Kate's lips.

"_It's not his baby Kate."_ Jack continued just as affectionately.

The statement turned Kate's expression to confusion, asking him with her eyes what he meant.

"_It's your baby. The baby is a part of you, not him. She's growing inside of you Kate."_ Jack let go of one of her hands and placed it gently on her stomach.

Jack glanced up from his hand that was resting on her stomach and into Kate's tear-filled eyes. _"I don't want you to wake up one morning, look back and regret the choice you made."_

Kate let out a small whimper, squeezing Jack's left hand.

Jack squeezed it back gently before letting go of it, folding both of his arms around her, bring her in to a comforting hug.

"_Don't let your hatred of Wayne make this decision for you Kate."_ Jack mumbled in to her brown curls.

Tilting his head slightly he whispered in her eat. _"Let your heart decide."_

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_r&r :)_


	21. In the End It Doesn’t Even Matter

_thanks guys for all the reviews.. im going on vacation next week but im gonna try my very best to update again before that :)_

_thx sonia for being my betasistah! would be no goodie story without you ;)_

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**Chapter Twenty One – In the End It Doesn't Even Matter**

The day had passed by unusually slow. Jack hadn't been able to focus all day on anything except Kate.

Hours earlier he had left her, sitting alone on the bed. She had made him promise to wake her before he left, because she didn't want to sleep alone. The fact that she didn't sleep very well alone hadn't gone unnoticed by him. It worried him, but at the same time he liked the fact that he had the comforting effect on her that her, making her sleep more peacefully with him close.

She had promised to think through what he had said yesterday, but also made it clear that she wasn't going to change her mind. She had said that the abortion was something she just needed to do. He had reluctantly dropt it. He didn't want to persuade her into change her mind.

Jack glanced at his watch for the hundredth time. Just a couple of more minutes, then he was supposed to meet Kate outside. He felt nervous. The normal nervous feeling you got before going to the doctor or the dentist. Jack shrugged it off, reminding himself it was Kate who had an appointment and not him.

Finally on his way, Jack walked out through the main entrance of the university, immediately spotting Kate outside. She looked beautiful, Jack thought, noting that she was wearing a blue skirt with a white blouse. Very unlike her, but it still looked great.

_"You look beautiful."_ Jack said as he walked up behind her.

Kate turned around, giving him a bashful smile. _"Thank you. I kind of regret the skirt though."_ Kate answered, self-consciously fingering on the blue material.

_"Don't. It looks great."_ Jack reassured her. Giving her a quick kiss, Jack received a new shy smile from the brunette. Jack smiled back, realizing that that had been their first kiss in public. Leaning down, Jack gave her another soft kiss before gently talking her hand in his.

It took them almost an hour and a half to get to the clinic. They had stopped by a pizzeria to have lunch on the way, even though Kate had insisted that she wasn't hungry.

Walking into the light green painted waiting room, Jack could tell that Kate was nervous. He smoothly slipped his hand into hers like he had done earlier and squeezed it reassuringly.

Kate gave him a weak smile as they sat down, still connected by their hands, waiting for them to call Kate in.

Jack could feel Kate tightening her grip on his hand as a blonde woman walked into the waiting room. The middle aged woman glanced down in her papers before calling out 'Kate Austin' into the almost empty room.

Kate didn't move, nor make any indication that she had heard the woman. Jack tilted his head slightly to the right and squeezed her hand, letting her know that he was right there.

From the look of it, Kate was holding her breath. Jack slowly got up from his seat and gently pulled Kate up as well. _"It's gonna be okay"_ He whispered quietly as they followed the blonde woman down a yellow painted corridor.

They were left alone in a room which looked more like an office than a room belonging in a clinic. Jack walked over to one of the chairs and sat down, leaving Kate standing next to him.

It didn't take more than a few seconds until the door opened once more and a black haired woman in her 40s entered, wearing a white doctor's coat. _"Hello Ms Austen, I'm Dr. Lori Parker."_ Shaking Kate's hand, Dr Parker walked around to the other side of the desk.

_"Jack Shepard."_ Jack introduced himself standing up, shaking the woman's hand over the desk.

_"Please sit down."_

Jack sat back down in his chair and Kate took a seat next to him.

The black haired doctor browsed through the papers on the desk for a second. _"I understand that you want to do an abortion, am I correct?"_ She said in a professional voice, looking up at Kate.

Kate confirmed this with an almost invisible nod.

Jack took the opportunity to interrupt, before Dr Parker had a chance to continue._ "I was wondering if Kate could maybe talk to a psychiatrist before she goes through with the actual procedure."_

Kate's head snapped up at the words and she glared at him.

_"Actually it's mandatory within the process of the abortion, to talk to either a counselor or a psychiatrist. That's actually why I'm here."_

Kate exhaled loudly as she let her sight fall to the ground. Jack once more found her hand and held it tightly. Feeling Kate squeeze his hand back lightly, Jack felt a bit better, knowing that she was okay.

_"I'm going to send you over to Dr. Connor for the procedure."_ The black haired doctor continued, obviously not aware of Kate's discomfort. _"But first I'm going to explain shortly what we are going to do and then just ask you a few questions."_

Jack nodded to himself, patiently waiting for the woman to carry on. Glancing over at Kate, he could see that she was still looking at the ground, loose curls hiding most of her beautiful face.

_"We are going to give you a pharmaceutical abortifacient with anti-progestagenic and anti-glucocorticoid effects."_

Jack could tell from the corner of his eye that Kate tilted her head up, first glancing quickly at the doctor than over at him.

The doctor picked up on the puzzled look from the girl as well. Clearing her throat she turned to look directly at Kate. _"Mifeprex, it's a drug. It blocks a hormone required to sustain a pregnancy."_

_"What if it doesn't work?"_ Jack asked, giving the Dr Parker an unimpressed look.

_"Incase of an incomplete termination of the pregnancy, it would require further intervention."_

Jack nodded slowly, taking in the information. He knew that the percentage that the Mifeorex would work was high, so the chance of any 'further intervention' was slim.

Silence took over the room until Kate cleared her throat. _"What exactly does that mean?"_ her voice was a bit shaky and she was still not looking at the doctor in front of her.

_"It means that we would have to complete the abortion surgically, with a vacuum or manual aspiration."_ The woman explained casually, glancing over at Jack.

_"If you want we could always do a vacuum aspiration right away." _Dr Parker offered, turning her attention back to Kate's.

_"No, I'll go with the pharmaceutical… thing."_ Kate said quietly, nibbling slightly on her lower lip.

_"Alright, in that case we'll have you back here on Wednesday to give you a dose of Misoprostol as well, to induce contractions and that would be it."_

Kate nodded slowly looking like she was progressing all the information she had been given.

_"Okay, Well Ms Austen, if your boyfriend could wait outside for just-"_

_"No, I want him to stay."_ Kate said firmly, for the first time meeting the doctor's eyes properly.

_"I just want to ask you a few questions and then the three of us could talk again after that."_ The older woman said, sounding a bit inpatient.

Jack rose from his seat, still holding Kate's hand. _"Alright"_

Jack leaned down to Kate. _"I'll be right outside. Okay?" _Giving her hand a final squeeze, he let it go as she responded with a small apprehensive nod.

Sitting in the corridor staring at door, Jack felt bad for leaving her alone, especially since she had wanted him to stay.

Ten minutes passed and Jack started to become worried. Maybe he should knock on the door and make sure everything was alright.

The black haired doctor suddenly came out of the room and headed over to where he was sitting. Jack at once noted the anxious look on the woman's face as she stopped right in front of him.

_"Is she alright?"_ Jack asked anxiously, sensing that something was wrong.

When the female doctor hesitated with her answer Jack rose from his seat, giving her a threatening and inpatient look.

Jack paced down the hall, waking a few steps ahead of Dr Parker and flew back into the room he had left earlier.

Kate was sitting on the floor against one of the walls, knees protectively bent up against her body, arms wrapped around them. It looked like she was swaying back and forth, face hidden against her knees.

Jack turned around slightly and gave the older woman a very disapproving look. What the hell had she done to her? Jack took a few quick steps and crashed down on the floor in front of his girlfriend, gently placing his hands on her shoulders.

_"Hey. It's okay."_ His voice was soft, over floated with worry.

Kate was shaking her head slowly from one side to the other, still hiding her face.

_"Kate…"_ Jack tried again to get her attention. Feeling more worried by the fact that she wasn't responding properly.

_"I can't… I can't"_ She ranted between sobs.

_"It's okay. You don't have to do anything you don't want to."_ Jack reassured, gently bringing her into a comforting hug.

_"But I do…"_ Kate divulged, choking on another sob.

Unsure what she meant, Jack just held her close, trying to calm her down. Jack rested his head gently on top of hers, glaring back up at Dr Parker who still stood frozen in the door opening.

The woman opened her mouth to say something but hesitated and closed it again. Letting her eyes fall to the floor in front of her, the black haired woman seemed to be embarrassed.

Jack just gave her another disapproving look and turned his attention back to Kate. _"Kate, lets get you out to the car okay?"_

Feeling Kate shake her head against his body, Jack stroked her back soothingly with his hands.

_"It's probably not a good idea to go through with an abortion in her state."_ Dr Parker said logically, not really meeting his eyes.

_"You think?"_ Jack snapped back at the woman as he rose from the floor, gently helping Kate to her feet. Placing his arm around her shoulders protectively, Jack led her out of the room and back out to the car.

Jack managed to open the passenger door to his car without letting go of Kate. Gently guiding her to sit down on the seat, feet still lingering on the ground, Jack kneeled down steadying himself with the open car door.

Kate wasn't meeting his eyes, still breathing very unevenly. Jack could tell that she was crying even though he couldn't see her face nor hear any sobbing.

_"Kate…"_ Jack said gently, tilting her head up with one of his hands, leveling it with his own. It hurt him to see the tears on her cheeks, even thought he had known they were there. He hated to see her hurt, sad, in pain or anything else for that matter that wasn't considered a positive state.

Letting his hand linger on her cheek, even though she was now looking at him, Jack gave her a small reassuring smile. He could feel her lean in slightly to the touch of his hand, closing her eyes. She inhaled loudly before letting her head once more fall towards the ground, away from his hand.

Jack leaned closer and placed a soft kiss on her forehead before he stood back up and walked around the car to the driver seat.

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_i'll give ya a cookie if youreview ;)_


	22. Loose Ends

_sorry that I didnt update before I left -hangs with head in shame- _

_but here's a cutish chap to make up for it -puppy eyes-_

_thx for all the review and thx sonie for all the help.. youre soon cowriting my fic with me :D_

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**Chapter Twenty Two – Loose Ends**

It was killing him but Jack had decided to give Kate some space. He was hoping that she would come to him. After the 30 minute drive back to the apartment, without Kate as much as making a sound, Jack started doubting that she would.

Back up in the apartment Kate wrapped her arms protectively around herself, tears in her eyes threatening to start streaming down her cheeks. Pacing over to the couch, Kate sat down, tuckingher legs underneath her.

Jack was having the worst battle with his own mind. Should he go over there, wrap his arms around her and tell her everything was going to be ok, or should he just leave her be?

Hearing her start to sob quietly, Jack walked over to the couch and sat down next to her. Gently bringing her into a comforting embrace, Jack stroked her back with his hands. Even if it didn't help her, at least Jack himself felt a lot better.

The hug seemed to make her cry even harder, burying her face in his neck, Kate clung closer to the warmth of his body. _"Jack, I'm so confused…"_

_"Shh it's okay. It's okay for you to be confused"_ Jack whispered soothingly, resting his head on hers.

Jack continued to hold her until her sobs turned to quiet hiccups. Kate tilted her head slightly, but not enough to actually meet his eyes. _"I want to go back…"_ Her voice was barely a whisper but the words stung in Jack's ears.

_"No, Kate."_ Jack begun as he gently cupped her face, turning her chin up to look her in the eye. _"I want you to give this some time."_

There was no way he was bringing her back there anytime soon. He was starting to get seriously worried about these breakdowns she had started to have all too often.

_"Jack…"_ Kate made a faint attempt to reply, but Jack silenced her by placing his hands on her shoulders, locking her eyes with his.

_"You can do an abortion in a month or even in two months if you want to. Please don't push yourself to do it right now. Just let all of this sink in."_

She was nibbling on her low lips. For once Jack took that as something positive, she was progressing what he had said.

Kate nodded as a silent affirmation that she was going to take his advice.

Jack let out a breath and gave her a small smile. He couldn't believe how much it hurt him to see her in this condition. I wanted more than anything to just take all her problems away, but he knew it wasn't that easy.

Pulling the brunette closer, Jack wrapped his arms firmly around her waist. Kate let herself be pulled closer so that she was sitting on his lap, straddling him with a knee on each side of his lap.

Kate gently placed her head on his shoulder as she folded her arms around his neck. The position reminded Jack slightly of how he would hold a small infant sleeping on his chest.

Jack listened intensely to the rhythm of Kate's breathing, pleased that it had slowed down and even more thankful that she was no longer crying. Jack drew soft circles on her back, still trying to sooth her down. He knew that she was still upset even if she no longer was showing it as clearly.

_"Don't worry Kate, it's going to be okay. We'll figure everything out together, I promise."_ Jack whispered softly, placing a tender kiss on her hair.

He could feel Kate tighten her grip around his neck before slowly moving her head up, resting their foreheads together.

_"I don't know what I would do without you Jack"_ Kate whispered making Jack shiver at the feeling of Kate's breath against his lips.

_"You'll never have to find that out"_ Jack whispered back, his voice full of love.

Kate closed her eyes as Jack gently brushed his lips against hers, moving his hands up into her hair. Pulling away, Kate leaned back, placing herself more firmly on Jack's lap. They both realized as Kate glanced down in the small space between them, that their position was quite intimate. Kate was straddling him, literally sitting right over his crotch.

Jack couldn't tell from Kate's expression if it made her uncomfortable or not, but he could tell that she had tensed up, indicating that it did.

Jack sat up more straight himself which only brought their bodies closer together as well as their faces. Jack immediately leaned back against the back of the couch to regain the little distance they had had.

Jack smoothly moved his hands from her hair and neck down to her hips, gently pushing Kate a few inches away from his body.

Kate had her bottom lip between her teeth but there was a small adorable smile on her lips, telling him that she was definitely okay, even if she wasn't meeting his eyes.

Clearing his throat, Jack gently tilted her head up with his hand, only to see her cheeks fairly flushed. _"Do you want to go out? We could catch a movie or something?"_

_"Like a date?"_ Kate's face lit up slightly, a small smile appeared on her lips.

Jack gently tucked a loose curl back behind her ear._ "Yeah, like a date"_ Jack affirmed, smiling widely back at her.

_"Don't you have to get up early tomorrow?"_ Kate asked concerned, with a hint of disappointment in her voice.

_"Why, you planning on keeping me up late?"_ Jack smirked at her, raising his eye browses in a fake shocked away.

He could tell that the comment made her blush even more than before. Letting her eyes fall slightly, Kate gave him a shy smile. _"I just meant that maybe it's not the best night to go out."_

He couldn't help but smile at her concern for him. She was right though. He needed to get up pretty early. It was not the most ideal time to go to the movies. _"Alright, how about this weekend?"_

Kate nodded excitedly. _"I'd like that"_ Jack couldn't tell if she was blushing again or if her cheeks hadn't recovered fully from the crimson color they had turned earlier.

_"It's a date."_ Jack announced happily, leaning closer to seal the deal with a kiss.

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_r&r ;)_


	23. It All Comes Down to This

_thank you allfor the reviews :)_

_-gives cookies to her dear readers-_

_new chappy... ... _

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**Chapter Twenty Three – It All Comes Down to This**

It was Thursday afternoon. Jack had so far had three days to plan the perfect first date for Kate and him. He hadn't come very far with the preparations though, even if it was the only thing he had thought about the last couple of days. Jack wanted them to do something special. He had considered bringing Kate on a helicopter tour over the city. But he put the idea aside, remembering that Kate was pregnant and not in a state to be flying around.

The only solid thing he had managed to fix so far was a necklace. He had bought it the day before and he had planned to give her as a first date gift. He had hidden it above his closet, together with the teddy bear his mother had given them.

Even being as distracted as he had been Jack had managed to get a couple of new friends at the university. Maybe friends weren't the right word, but a small group of them had spent quite some time together and already formed their own study group.

Finally being on his way from the university and back home, Jack had the worst feeling in is stomach. Something was wrong. He couldn't put his finger on it though. Had he maybe forgotten something?

Jack let the thoughts tumble around in his head as he walked down the corridor to the apartment, reaching the door he finally gave up and pushed them aside.

Opening the door, Jack's eyes immediately feel on the coffee table in the middle of the room. Everything had been knocked down and most of the items that were usually on the table were now strewn across the floor.

Darting his eyes around, Jack found what he was looking for. Kate. She was sitting against the doorframe to the bedroom. Knees bent, legs pressed against her body. It looked like she had slid down the wall and just stayed in that position. She looked defeated, like she had lost or given up on something

Jack paced over to her and sat down next to her on the hard wooden floor. _"Kate?"_ He carefully tilted her head up with his fingers to see her face. Her eyes were unfocused and empty, without any trace of emotion what so ever.

He had expected to see tears or at least tear stains on her face, but he couldn't see either. Her otherwise warm and loving face was pale and completely blank. It almost scared him that she could look so cold.

But what really got his attention was the bruise on the side of Kate's forehead. It looked like someone had slammed her with a book or a fry pan right in the head.

_"Kate, what happened?"_ He tried again, now more concerned and worried than ever. Jack traced his fingertips over the bruise making Kate flinch slightly.

When she didn't respond, Jack placed both of his hands on her cheeks, steadying her face as he looked directly into her eyes. He wasn't sure that she was aware of his presence. Jack felt himself starting to panic. What was going on? Was she in some kind of trance? Should he call 911?

_"Mom was here."_ Kate suddenly whispered huskily, darting her eyes away from his stare.

_"Your mom was here?"_ He automatically repeated, unsure why, since he had definitely heard what she said.

_"Yeah. She was really upset."_ Kate said in an emotionless tone, eyes still empty looking into space.

Jack's eyes settled on her forehead. Had Diane done that? Trying to imagine how Kate and her mother could have possibly been fighting badly enough for Kate to get hurt, Jack let his fingers once more trace over the wound.

_"Kate, did Diane do this?"_ Jack's voice was shaky. He was scared. Not particularly about the wound, but because Kate was acting unnaturally withdrawn, still not responding like he wished she would and still hugging her legs close to her body.

Kate slowly shook her head, making the first real movement since Jack had entered the apartment._ "No, she left. Then Wayne came up here… He had been waiting in the car. He was furious because I got mom all upset."_

She looked so incredibly fragile, a very vulnerable look shinning in her eyes. Jack could see her bottom lip starting to tremble and the blank expression on her face suddenly fading as she bent her neck and buried her face in her legs, sobbing.

Jack could feel ever inch of his body freezing to ice at the mention of Kate's stepfather's name. Wayne had been in here? Jack was not aware that he had stopped breathing as he took another quick glance around in their apartment.

His eyes once more landed on the coffee table. It looked liked there had been a struggle. Could Kate have hit her head on the table?

_"Can you tell me what happened?"_ Jack asked warily as he gently placed his hand on her shoulder. Kate was still hugging her legs which gave Jack the feeling that she wanted distance between them.

_"He was yelling and then he pushed me and I think I hit my head on the coffee table, I was lying on the floor. I don't remember… I think I was unconscious… then we were on the bed and I tried to push him off of me but I couldn't and everything was just spinning, then I think I blacked out again."_

This is not happening, Jack thought to himself as he looked over his shoulder and his eyes fell on the unmade bed. No, no, no. Jack shut his eyes tightly as he turned his head back towards Kate.

Glancing down, Jack realized she was just wearing his navy blue bathrobe. How had he not noticed that before? Gently placing his hand on her cheek, Jack guided her head to his shoulder where she continued to sob.

He could feel her lean into him, slowly letting the emotions really come out. They sat like that for what felt like hours. Kate leaning slightly on Jack's shoulder, her arms still wrapped around herself. Pulling her closer, Jack started to whisper soothing words in her ear, hoping that his attempt to comfort her was working.

Jack gently pulled away from her, sneaking one of his arms under her knees.

_"What are you doing?"_ Kate's voice was fragile, sounding like it would break any second.

_"I'm just going to lift you off the floor, ok?"_

She gave him a small nod. Seeing her eyes full of trust, Jack gave her a weak sympatric smile. He carefully lifted her up, one hand under her knees and the other behind her back. Kate placed one of her hands around his neck, the other lazily on his chest. After a few wobbling steps he was about to put her down on the bed but stopped as Kate starting to shake her head frenetically. _"Please Jack, not the bed"_

Giving her an understanding nod, Jack walked out of the bedroom and sat them down on the couch. Kate sitting in his lap, still supported up in a sitting position by one of his arms. He started to slowly sway her back and forth, much like how you would sooth a small child.

Jack gently placed a kiss on her head, which was resting against his chest. Reaching over Jack grabbed one of the few items that were still lying on the coffee table and did something he knew he should have done a long time ago. He called the police.

* * *

_please dont throw stuff on me / haha_


	24. Healing through Water

_Thanks for all the reviews :) you guys are the best.._

_and sonie.. aww –gives flowers-_

_longish chap.. see it as a peace offering for being slow on the updates ;)_

_I hope the second part of this will make up for last chapter plus the first part of this one ;)_

_if not.. next chappy probably will ;p_

* * *

**Chapter Twenty Four – Healing through Water **

Apparently being knocked unconscious and then woken up naked on a bed was not a clear sign that you had been raped. Jack had been going crazy at the police station. He felt like they had questioned every single word Kate had managed to divulge and it had soon ended in him literally yelling and scream at the police officers to give her some space and stop pushing her.

Two hours later were they on their way back home. Kate hadn't spoken to him other than telling him to calm down at the police station. The whole ride back to the apartment was spent wordlessly, Jack driving and Kate silently watching the outside world through her side window.

Jack led Kate down the hall in the apartment building, with a protective arm around her shoulders. Unlocking the door, Jack gave Kate a reassuring smile before leading her inside and closing the door behind them.

They stayed in the hallway, arms wrapped around each other. Jack felt himself finally starting to calm down as he felt her chest rise up and down against him. She was alive. He hadn't thought of it before, but it could have been so much worse.

Sitting next to Kate at the police station while she tried to recreate the incident, Jack had pictured what had happened as the worst possible nightmare in the world. But standing close to Kate, feeling her every breath, Jack was suddenly thankful that she was with him, that she was still alive.¨

With his hands on her back, Jack gently stroked the material of the white shirt she was wearing, his shirt. She had pulled on a pair of jeans and one of his shirts before they had left the apartment a couple of hours earlier.

He loved seeing her in his clothes. Jack wasn't very possessive but seeing Kate in his clothes made it feel like she was without doubt his. He knew it was wrong to think of Kate as something he owned, but he just couldn't help it.

He could feel her shudder under his touch, he immediately stopped moving his hands and let them just rest on her back. Jack eased his grip around Kate, only to have her cling closer to his body. "Please don't let go" Kate whispered pleadingly, making Jack hug her closer again.

He was glad she wasn't withdrawing from him physically. He wouldn't have blamed her if she did, considering what had just happened. Thankful for the comfort himself, Jack tightened his arms around her petite body and rested his head on hers.

They stayed in their comforting embrace for almost half an hour. Kate had her arms around his waist and her head resting heavily on his shoulder, while Jack had one arm around her shoulders and one around her waist, with his chin resting gently against her forehead.

Jack noticed that Kate had started shivering which was soon followed by small quivering sobs. _"Jack I'm so scared…"_

_"Ssh, It's okay. You don't have to be scared."_ Jack said gently, drawing small circles with his thumbs on her back._ "He won't be able to hurt you anymore. If they don't put him away for this, I will personally make sure that he will never ever hurt you again."_ Jack spoke more firmly now, trying his best not to let the rage he could feel in his whole body at the mention of Wayne be heard.

She seemed to calm down a little by his words. Her sobs turned in to hiccups which finally faded away as well. _"Jack…"_ Kate whispered, her head still buried in his chest.

"_Yeah?"_

"_I want to do the abortion"_ Kate mumbled into his chest, but he could still hear her loud and clear.

Jack closed his eyes. He wanted to tell her that it was a bad idea. That she had just been through a trauma and was not in a condition to make such decisions right now. But he couldn't argue with her. Not after this.

He knew Kate had been through this before, but this was the first time that he had been aware of what had happened to her. Standing there, holding her trembling body made everything a lot more real than it had felt when Kate had divulged the dark secrets of her life back home.

He knew he couldn't possible understand how she was feeling, but he was sure he understood better today than he had yesterday. But he was still unsure if that was a good or bad thing.

"_Ok"_ Jack finally whispered back. _"We'll do it tomorrow if you want to." _

He felt guilty. It hadn't been fair of him to tell her to wait with an abortion. It didn't matter what her reasons were. If she wanted to get rid of that baby, she should be able to, without him telling her otherwise.

"_Thank you"_ Kate said quietly pressing herself closer to the warmth of his body.

A few more minutes passed, the couple still standing close together in their embrace.

"_I want to take a shower."_ Kate quietly divulged, pulling away slightly from Jack.

He gave her an understanding nod, followed by a soft kiss on the lips. _"I'm going to get us some dinner, okay?"_

"_No..." _Kate said tremblingly as she tightened her arms around his waist.

"_What is it?"_ Jack asked concerned, feeling the brunette holding him tighter and her body starting to quiver again.

"_I don't want you to leave…"_ Kate whispered with devastation in her voice.

"_Kate, I'm not going to leave."_ Jack said reassuringly, placing a gentle hand on her cheek._ "I'll be right over there in the kitchen."_

"_Please…"_

Jack looked past Kate on the bathroom door, finally understanding what she meant. _"Kate… I don't think that's a good idea" _Jack said quietly, his eyes lingering on the door.

"_Please"_ Kate repeated, her voice trembling as the word left her lips.

Jack tilted his head as he looked back down at her. Feeling like he couldn't deny her anything right now, Jack gave her a hesitant nod.

He led her to the bathroom, gently holding his hands on her waist as she walked a step ahead of him. Once inside he brought her back into another comforting hug. Resting their foreheads together, Jack gently caressed her cheek with one of his hands.

Taking a deep breath, Kate tilted her head down as she started to unbutton her shirt or well technically his shirt. Still resting his head against hers, Jack looked down and noticed that her hands were visibly shaking as she worked on the small white buttons.

Jack pulled away slight to be able to see her face. She was tilting her head down, her eyes firmly set on the buttons. Gently taking her hands in his, Jack squeezed them and then placed a soft kiss on each of the hands. Letting them go, Jack carefully started to unbutton the shirt himself. He didn't remove it after he was done, instead he left the shirt hanging loosely on her shoulders, revealing like a streak of her upper body, from her neck down to her bellybutton where the waistline of her blue jeans cut off the exposure of her skin.

Kate was staring right ahead at his chest, looking determined not to meet his eyes. _"Are you sure you want to do this?"_ Jack asked quietly, still not convinced that this was a particularly good idea.

Kate snapped out of the trance she had been in and met his eyes, giving him a firm nod. Their eyes still locked, Kate let her shoulders drop enough for the shirt to slide off and fall to the floor.

Jack kept his eyes locked with hers, gently tucking an untamed curl of her hair behind her ear. He let his hand stay intertwined in her hair until he let it trace down to her cheek.

Kate started chewing on her lip as she unbuttoned her blue jeans. Letting them fall down to the floor Kate gently kicked them off her feet and left them lying next to the shirt.

They were still standing relatively close. Jack had his hands on her waist, his eyes set on her face while Kate's eyes were darting around which gave away that she was nervous.

"_Kate…"_ Jack started, not sure what he was planning to say.

She slowly let their eyes meet again. "You're not going to shower in your jeans again, are you?" Kate asked with a tone of amusement in her voice, looking desperate to ease the tension that was building up in the small room.

Jack couldn't help but smile as he remembered how they had showered together back at his parents' house, dressed like they were right now. Kate in her underwear and Jack fully clothed.

"_I guess not"_ Jack replied, the words barely more than a breathless whisper. He was searching in her eyes, trying to determine if she was sure she knew what they were doing.

Jack let go of Kate's slim waist, which made Kate immediately place her hands on his chest to regain their connection. With a small nervous smile, Jack started to unbutton his own shirt. As soon as he was done, Kate moved her hands under the shirt and slipped it off of his muscular body.

Unbuttoning his pants, Jack started to breath slightly heavier. As he stepped out of the jeans, the voices in his head had started screaming at him. What are you doing? Had you even considered what was going to happen once you both have undressed?

There was no way this was a good idea. Why had he even agreed to step inside the bathroom with her? This could only end in a complete disaster.

Kate moved her hands from his chest up to his neck, a small smile creeping up on her lips. Jack once more wrapped his arms around her waist, trying his best not to listen to the voices in his head as he brought her almost naked body closer to his.

Resting her head on his shoulder, Kate let out a small muffled sound which Jack identified as a sob.

Gently stroking her back, Jack started whispering soothingly in her ear. _"Ssh, it's okay. It's all going to be okay."_

Kate had buried her face in his neck, her ever breath causing Jack to shiver. She had stopped sobbing a while ago which Jack was thankful for. It broke his heart when she cried, even worse if he wasn't able to calm her down.

He could feel her taking a deep breath before pulling away enough for them to see each others faces. She smiled at him, it was a weak smile but at least it reached her beautiful eyes.

Returning the smile, Jack leaned closer and captured her lips with his bring her into a tender kiss. Breaking the kiss before either one of them had the chance to deepen it, Jack closed his eyes and rested his forehead against hers.

"_If you want we could shower like this."_ Jack said softly, opening his eyes and glanced down at his grey boxers then over at the light green set of panties and bra she was wearing.

Kate gently shook her head as she moved her hands from Jack's neck to her back, with a concentrated look on her face. The green bra fell to the floor between their feet, almost immediately followed by the matching panties.

Jack could tell that she was nervous, her cheeks turning fairly pink. She was once again nibbling on her lower lip, her fingers fiddling with a loose string of her hair and her green eyes looked directly at his chest.

Jack had told himself not to check her out but the second her bra had dropped to the floor he had no longer been able to keep that promise to himself. Letting his eyes discreetly travel up and down her now naked body, Jack could feel his cheeks grow warmer.

Taking a small step closer, Jack closed the gap between them and folded his arms around her body. _"You're beautiful Kate."_ He whispered lovingly in her ear before he placed a soft kiss right beneath it.

Jack believed he heard her giggle against his skin but wasn't sure. Feeling her pull back slightly again, he could tell that she was looking down on his boxers.

"_I can keep them… If you want me to…"_ Jack trailed off.

Kate tilted her head to look at him. A fake shocked expression on her face. _"So I take off my underwear and you get to keep yours own? That's definitely not fair."_ Her voice was light, teasing but at the same time a little nervous.

Jack smiled her warmly, before quickly stepping out of his grey boxers leaving him just as exposed as her.

With a small mischievous smile on her lips, Kate drew him closer and took a pair of steps backwards until they were both standing in the shower.

Placing a soft kiss on Kate's forehead, Jack reached behind her and turned the shower on. He watched as she closed her eyes the second the warm water hit her, tilting her head back. He could literally see how the steaming water melted away all the unpleasant memories from her body.

Feeling Kate gently tugging on his hand, Jack stepped slightly closer to her. The fact that they were both naked didn't seem to bother either one of them as they once more wrapped their arms around each other and drew their bodies closer together.

Jack knew that they had never been more intimate than they were right now and that they probably wouldn't be this close again any time soon. Feeling Kate's smooth skin pressed against him, he had to remind himself that this was entirely for comfort, not only for Kate but for him as well.

The fact that Kate had had no problem undressing in front of him and was now standing completely naked in his arms was probably the best comfort he could get in the world. He had been scared that she would have pushed him away, gotten withdrawn and started to shut him out. If anything, it felt like she was showing the complete opposite side effects.

Kate tilted her head back up, letting her eyes meet his brown ones. He could tell that she was thankful that he was there. Her eyes were sparkling with gratitude.

Jack smiled at her, giving her a quick kiss. Kate immediately responded to the kiss, wrapping her arms around his neck to draw him closer. Feeling her tongue run smoothly over his teeth, Jack automatically opened his mouth to grant her access.

Knowing that they were on very dangerous grounds making out naked in the shower, he pulled away. It wasn't as easy as he had hoped since Kate followed his movement and managed to seal their lips together instantly after the connection were broken.

Jack let out a suppressed groan as Kate ran her hands up and down his muscular chest, still eagerly kissing him.

"_Kate…"_ Jack mumbled against her lips, desperately trying to regain control over the situation.

Moving his hands to her shoulders, Jack reluctantly pushed her away. _"Kate, you've got to stop."_ Jack said breathlessly, feeling like he was drowning in her eyes.

She was gazing back at him, a slightly unsure expression starting to appear on her face.

"_It's okay"_ Jack said reassuringly, giving her a small peck. _"Just, don't do that when we're both naked, unless you want it to lead to something else." _

She gave him a shy weak smile before she reached for the bottle of shampoo standing behind her. _"You know I wouldn't mind if we bought some shampoo that wouldn't make me smell like a 10 year old boy." _

Jack grinned back at her.

"_Plus some conditioner. I know you have like, no hair, but I have quite a lot of it if you haven't noticed." _She said jokingly, letting one of her hands run through her tangled curls.

Jack's grin turned into a devilish smirk. _"Oh trust me I've noticed that you're not a 10 year old boy."_ Raising his eyebrows slightly, he gave her suggestive, but playful look.

"_Jack!"_ Kate blushed, hitting him lightly on the arm.

He gave her a warm smile. _"Sorry, I'll behave too, I promise."_ His voice was playful but somehow still sincere. _"And we'll buy whatever you want" _He added sweetly.

Kate had started shampooing her hair, letting her fingers run smoothly through the dark curls. Jack stood completely frozen, taking in every movement she made. She suddenly stopped and gave him a questioning look.

"_Sorry, you're just so…"_ Jack couldn't find the right words but she seemed to get what he was trying to say, because she started to blush.

Jack wrapped his arms around her and drew her body closer to his. He could tell that she was getting cold. No wonder, they had been in the shower for quite some time now.

He leaned closer to whisper in her ear. Water started to stream down in his face as he had moved his head almost directly under the shower. Moving both of them slightly out from the stream, Jack quickly wiped his face with one of his hands. _"We should get out…"_

"_No please not yet"_ Her voice was pleading, her eyes turning a shade darker as they filled with a look of devastation.

Jack was taken back by the sudden change in her mood. Letting his hands stroke her back gently, he kissed her reassuringly on the lips. _"Okay, not yet."_ Jack promised as he wrapped his arms around her more firmly.

Staying in this position for a few more minutes, Jack could feel Kate's smaller body starting to shiver. She no longer felt particularly cold in his arms, so he guessed that his body temperature was just as low as hers.

"_Kate…"_ Jack started.

Kate buried her face in his neck, shaking her head faintly. _"Please Jack, I-"_

He cut her off. _"Kate you're shaking. It's time to get out."_ He voice was firm, letting her know that he wouldn't budge.

He turned off the shower, guiding her out of it without her arguing. Grabbing a towel, he carefully placed it around her shoulders. Jack then took a second one and hung it lazily around his waist, while Kate wrapped the one he had given her more firmly around her petite body.

He smiled at her before once more bring her closer to him. He gently rubbed his hands over her arms in an attempt to get her warmer. _"You feeling any better?" _

Kate smiled up at him and nodded.

"_I can't believe we just showered together though."_ Kate said with a giggle, her cheeks turning to a cute crimson color.

"_I'm glad you persuaded me."_ Jack said with a small grin, leading her out of the bathroom.

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_I live for reviews :D_


	25. Closure

_Thanks again for all the reviews, glad you guys are still with me :)_

_ive been a lil torn here if i should have changed the rating on this chap to M _

_but well i didnt so read with __caution :p_

**----------------- x -----------------**

**Chapter Twenty Five – Closure **

After he had pulled on a T-shirt and sweatpants, Jack had started preparing dinner but had almost immediately given up. He had instead just picked up the phone and ordered take out.

They had eaten in a comfortable silence, sitting next to each other on the couch. When they were done had Jack went to the kitchen to do the dishes while Kate had curled up in a small ball on the couch, once more hugging her legs close, her chin resting on her knees. She was wearing another one of his dress shirts and a pair of jeans. It looked slightly odd with the too large shirt but he hadn't questioned her when she had gone straight for his closet after the shower.

Jack frequently glanced over at Kate, worried that she suddenly seemed to be going backwards in her recovery. Unsure what he should do about it, Jack let out an almost inaudible sigh as he placed the now clean plates back in the cupboard.

Finishing up in the kitchen, Jack walked across the room and stopped next to the couch. He could feel Kate watching him as he methodically picked up all the things that were spread out on the living room floor. Placing most of them back on the coffee table where they had previously been, Jack gave Kate a sympathetic look as he stood back up.

Walking over to the bedroom, Jack stopped in the doorway. He felt sick. He was actually considering rushing over to the bathroom to throw up. With a deep breath, Jack entered the room and paced over to the closet to get new sheets before walking to the bed with heavy steps. He violently tore the sheets and bedding off the bed and threw them to a corner of the room.

Turning around again, Jack noticed the figure standing in the doorway watching him closely. He couldn't tell if she was planning on actually entering the room or just standing there, on her secure distance.

Giving her a weak smile, Jack unfolded the sheet and tossed it over the bed. Out of no where two arms were wrapped around his waist from behind, making Jack turn around. Kate at once reached up and sealed their lips together as Jack unconsciously wrapped his arms around her body.

Kate had deepened the kiss right away, hungrily starting to explore his mouth as she clung closer in his protective embrace. Jack was startled as he felt Kate pushing him backwards until they fell on the bed.

Kate straddled him, leaning in to once more capturing his lips in a passionate kiss. Sliding her hands up under his shirt, Jack could feel her soft hands smoothly caressing first his stomach then his chest. Letting out a groan as he felt Kate press herself down harder on him, Jack finally found the power to move his arms.

Jack placed a hand on each side of her waist, pulling her away slightly. _"Kate, what are you doing?"_

He could see a flash in Kate's eyes before she struggled against his hands which were keeping her away from him. She had gotten a tight grip around each of his wrist and managed to overpower the startled Jack before once more capturing his lips with hers.

Jack changed his strategy and flipped them over, grabbing her hands and pinning her down against the bed. Kate had a stunned expression across her face, her eyes looking up at him in shock. Feeling her struggle underneath him, Jack immediately realized what he had done

Regretting his move, he shamefully let go of her hands, which he had had pinned down to each side of her body. _"Sorry, I…"_ The words came out as a whisper but were immediately cut off by Kate's lips.

_"Jack, just shut up"_ Kate said sternly between kisses.

Finally starting to respond to the numerous of kisses Kate had poured over him, Jack gently placed his hands on each side of her face.

Kate once more wrapped her arms around his back, pressing him closer. Slipping her hands in under his T-shirt, she effortlessly pulled it off over his head.

Reality once more caught up with Jack, who rolled off of Kate and sat up. _"We shouldn't do this…"_ Jack said with a sigh, staring into the wall in front of him.

Kate got up as well and crawled over to where he was sitting, once again straddling him, placing her hands to his naked chest. _"Why not?"_ She sounded harsh, her eyes shooting him a stern look.

_"Kate… stop, please."_ Jack said in frustration, taking her hands off his chest.

A hurt expression appeared on her face, but was soon replaced by one of irritation. _"Why? I know you want to do this! So dammit Jack, stop pushing me away!"_ She was screaming, tears threatening to make their way down her cheeks.

_"Kate, we're not doing this right now. Not after what happened earlier today. Kate, no. Just stop."_ Jack had raised his voice as well, trying to ignore the fact that tears had started streaming down her face.

Kate looked taken back by his words, and pushed him back forcefully when he made an attempt to move her off of him to get up._ "Jack you still don't get it, do you!"_ She was screaming, looking angrier than before. _"What happened to me today, used to happen to me every day! Stop babying me because of it. Stop treating me like I'm going to break!"_

Jack gently wrapped his arms around her with a startled look on his face. He could feel Kate lean against him, thankful for the comforting embrace._ "It's gonna be okay. Just please calm down" _His voice was soft with an evident tone of concern.

Kate stayed in her position until she had calmed down, then she slowly pulled away from Jack. With tear stains on her cheeks, Kate was chewing nervously on her lower lip. _"Jack…"_ She whispered quietly as Jack placed a hand tenderly to her cheek. _"Jack, I want to do this. I need to do this."_

Jack gave her a sympathetic look, gently caressing her cheek with his right hand._ "I really don't think that this is a good idea."_ Jack trailed off, feeling crushed by the saddened expression on Kate's face.

_"Please Jack, I want to feel you. Please do this for me."_ She was pleading, making it sound almost ridiculous.

Before he even had a chance to respond, Kate had captured his lips gently pushing him back on the bed so that she was lying on top of him. Feeling himself completely forgetting why he had been pushing her away, Jack drowned in the passionate kiss.

A few loving kisses later, Jack had managed to switch place with the brunette. Hovering over her, Jack started undoing the buttons on the shirt she had borrowed. Kissing her neck tenderly, he traced kisses down her body successively as he unbuttoned the shirt.

Leaving the shirt open, Jack continued to kiss her stomach, reaching the waistband of her jeans he stopped and started to carefully unbutton the light blue pants.

He quickly glanced up at Kate's face to make sure that she was alright. From the look of it she was holding her breath, which made Jack lean back up and captured her lips in a reassuring kiss, leaving the pants on, but unbuttoned.

He loved kissing her. He felt like he was floating as her lips brushed against his. They had managed to get the sheet that Jack had tossed lazily over the bed on top of them as a cover.

Jack pulled Kate up into a sitting position and slid the shirt off her shoulders, tossing it to the floor before he gently lowered her back on the bed. No matter how determined she had seemed moments earlier, Jack could tell that she was nervous.

Leaning down Jack rested his forehead against hers for a second. _"You okay?"_

She responded with a quick but firm nod before pressing her lips hard against his. Letting his hands once more travel over her body, Jack snuck them around her back and undid her bra in a smooth motion.

He could feel Kate tugging on his belt, letting out a frustrated sound when she didn't mange to open it. Jack leaned down and gave her a quick kiss before opening the belt with easy, kicking off both his pants and boxers.

Before lying down again from his half sitting position, Jack gently slid Kate's jeans off her hips and down her legs, letting them fall to the floor next to the bed. Her panties soon followed suit, leave her completely naked just as him.

Locking his eyes with Kate's, Jack could tell that she was anxious. He wasn't sure but it felt like she was shaking, not much but shivering slightly underneath him. _"Just try to relax"_ Jack whispered gently against her lips, in an affectionate tone.

Kate inhaled rapidly, her eyes widening, which made Jack immediately stop, afraid that he had hurt her.

He could feel Kate pressing him closer, gently digging her nails into his back. _"Please don't stop"_ He had never heard her sound more pleading. It was as if she had just begged him to spare her life.

Giving her a reassuring smile, Jack placed a soft kiss on her cheek, before capturing her lips with his own.

Jack kept a slow rhythm not wanting to hurry either one of them. He wanted this moment to last forever. He loved the feeling of her skin against his. It was like something out of a dream. A dream he had been having for over a year.

He was looking down at her face, tracing her facial features with his eyes. She was definitely the most beautiful girl he had ever seen. Watching her, Jack was fascinated by how her expression changed with his movements. She had her eyes closed and a somewhat concentrated look on her face, but he could tell that she was enjoying it. Leaning down closer, Jack placed a passionate but still gentle kiss on her lips.

He couldn't believe how perfect they fit together. It was like they had been made for one another. It felt so different from the other times he had had sex. Even if it had only been with two other people, this was like the opposite.

The fact that it was different from his time with Tracy was not a surprise. That had been such a big mistake. A stupid one night stand he would do anything to undo.

But with Sarah. He had been with her for so long, telling himself that they were destined for each other, that fate had brought them together. Fate? He didn't even believe in fate.

But he had never felt the same way about Sarah has he did about Kate. Even when he had been with Sarah had his feelings for Kate been different. Sarah had noticed and it was something they had constantly fought about. But he had denied those feelings to Sarah and ignored them for longer than he could remember.

She had been with Tom, something that had literally torn his heart apart. He had never liked that guy. In his mind, Tom had never appreciated Kate or respected her the way she deserved. For years, Jack had desperately tried to get along with him for Kate's sake. Mostly out of fear that she would choose her boyfriend over him if she was ever forced into that position.

He snapped out of his thoughts as Kate let out a whimper. He could tell that she was out of breath, each breath more heavy, almost like she was choking. Jack stopped moving and put more weight on his hands and less on Kate's smaller body, worried that he was actually suffocating her.

Kate wrapped her legs around him, making sure he couldn't move away from her._ "It feels good, don't stop"_ Kate said breathlessly, as if she had heard his thoughts.

Jack smiled at her, even though he knew she couldn't see it through her closed eyelids. Picking up his pace again, he continued to watch her as she let out a small moan.

He wished Kate would open her eyes, so that he would be able to see her beautiful eyes change shades whilst he showed her how much he loved her.

Before he had even finished the thought, Kate opened her eyes as she reached up and kissed him. Gazing into her eyes he was met by a look of passion, lust and love that left him completely speechless.

He could tell that she was close, which made him more eager to speed up the steady rhythm he had held the whole time. Kate's arms tighten their grip around him as he felt her body starting to shudder underneath him, making him hold her closer as well. Seconds later he reached his own peak, letting out a moan which Kate silenced with a loving kiss.

Collapsing down on his back next to her, Jack tried to catch his breath. He felt Kate snuggle closer to him, intertwining their legs together as she placed her head on his chest.

_"I love you"_ He whispered softly, placing a soft kiss on her forehead. Jack looked down on her, taking in the beautiful picture in front of him. Kate resting on top of him, her chocolate brown curls spread out all over his chest.

Kate lazily lifted her head enough for him to see her eyes._ "I love you too Jack"_ Kate whispered back as an adorable smile crept up on her lips.

**----------------- x -----------------**

_r&r :)_


	26. Evaluate Your Memories

_no guys i havent forgotten about this story. sorry about the late update, but i havent gotten around to writing on it :(_

_planning on writing a few chaps next week so i'm gonna try to make up for it_

* * *

**Chapter Twenty Six – Evaluate Your Memories**

Jack woke up by the annoying sound of the phone in the other room. Gently untangling himself from the beautiful brunette, Jack pulled on a pair of boxers in a hurry before pacing out to the living room to answer the phone.

_"Hello"_ Jack answered unfocused as he tiredly sat down on the couch.

_"Hello Jack. I was hoping I'd catch you before you left for school."_ A very similar female voice said in his ear. Glancing up at the wall, Jack noticed that it was already 7:00, meaning he would probably miss his first lecture, not that he had actually planned to go at all today.

_"I was wondering if maybe you and Kate wanted to come visit us this weekend." _The woman sounded unsure, the voice had a trace of pleading in it.

_"Mom, I don't think so. It's been a very strained week."_ Jack paused, unsure what else to say. He felt slightly guilty for turning down what was obviously a new attempt at a peace offering.

Jack heard a disappointed sighed in the phone.

_"How about next week?"_ Jack said slowly, knowing that if there was to be a trial against Wayne, Kate would probably have to go back home for a few days. He hoped she wouldn't need to testify thought, knowing that it would be painful for her.

_"That would be lovely."_ Margo answered happily. _"Next weekend it is"_

_"Actually we might come during the week or stay more than the weekend. I don't know for sure right now."_ Jack said wearily.

_"Oh… Is something the matter?"_

Jack exhaled loudly, burying his face in the hand that wasn't holding the phone, wiping off invisible sweat from his forehead. _"Yeah kinda, but I'll tell you in person, ok?"_

_"Ok" _Margo answered, sounding slightly worried._ "Well, just give me a call before you leave New York. Tell Kate I said Hi."_

Placing the phone back on the coffee table next to the couch, Jack glanced over to the kitchen area, considering making breakfast for Kate but dropped the idea as his eyes traveled back to the open bedroom door. Sneaking back to the bedroom, Jack carefully crawled back into bed, not wanting her to wake up alone. He wrapped his arms around her and drew her closer, feeling her snuggle closer into to his embrace.

Jack had drifted off to sleep but woke up when he felt something tickle his neck. With his eyes still closed Jack gently moved the string of chocolate brown hair away from his neck and let the hand softly run over Kate's head in the same motion.

She was lying on top of him, her head on his shoulder, an arm lazily lying on his chest and she had managed to sneak one of her legs in between his.

When he opened his eyes, he was met by her hazel green ones as well as a cute shy smile. _"Good morning"_

_"Morning"_ Jack greeted back, a smile spreading on his face.

Letting his fingers gently caress her cheek, Jack leaned closer and placed a quick kiss on her forehead. _"How are you feeling?"_

_"Good"_ Kate answered a bit muffled as she buried her face in his neck, inhaling heavily, making Jack shiver slightly._ "You?"_

_"Good"_ Jack echoed with a content voice, tracing small circles on her lower back with his fingertips.

Kate suddenly lifted her head slightly, once more meeting his eyes. A curious look flashed in her eyes. Jacks eyes widened has he felt Kate rub her leg against him._ "You're wearing boxers?"_

He wasn't sure if it had been a question, it had sounded a lot more like a statement. If not, he had a feeling she knew the answer by now, considering her naked leg was pressed against the white fabric, but he decided to answer her anyway. _"Uhm Yeah, the phone rang earlier. I put them on when I went up to answer it."_

_"Oh"_ Kate answered distractedly, sounding almost disappointed.

_"What? Want me to take them off again?"_ Jack said with a grin on his face, raising his eye brows suggestively.

Kate gave him an innocent look as well as a cute smile. Reaching forward she placed a teasing kiss on his lips. _"Maybe"_

Jack felt Kate snuggle back into his shoulder, letting out a small yawn. Placing a kiss on her forehead, Jack pulled the cover over them more firmly.

He watched her silently as she played slightly with the corner of the cover. She suddenly glanced up, apparently noticing that he was watching her. Blushing, Kate bit her bottom lip and let go of the soft material and instead placed her hand gently on Jack's chest.

_"Do you think that dad is going to forgive me?"_ Her voice was all of a sudden low, sounding like it was going to break at each word.

_"Kate…"_ Jack trailed off, unsure what to say. _"If he knew what had happened he wouldn't be upset. You have to know that."_

When she didn't answer, Jack gently brushed the back of his hand over her cheek. He could see the tears forming in her eyes and he detected the slight change in her breathing. _"Kate…"_

_"I know"_ She answered simply, suppressing a sob.

Jack was once more tracing circles on Kate's back, debated whether or not to just drop the subject. Taking a deep breath, he gently cupped Kate's face and tilted towards him. _"Kate… Do you want me to call your dad? I will if I want me to. I'll explain everything to him… or at least whatever you want him to know."_

Kate blinked several times, looking shocked but appreciative by his offer. _"No, I…" She trailed off. "I don't know, maybe."_

Jack gave her a weak smile. She looked so lost, Jack thought miserably to himself. The pained look on her face psychically hurt him.

_"Just say the words and I'll call him right now."_ Jack reassured once more, placing a soft kiss on her forehead.

Pulling back, Jack's eyes fell on Kate's mouth. She was nibbling on her bottom lip. He could have guessed she was doing that without actually looking at her. It was just so Kate.

_"Okay"_ She suddenly whispered, looking directly at him with those beautiful determined green eyes he loved more than anything.

Jack grinned and drew her closer. _"Want me to call him right now?"_ He asked almost excited by the fact that she for once had asked him to help her with something personal.

Kate gave him a strange look and shook her head slightly. _"No, it's too earl-"_

She didn't finish the sentence, instead she sat back up, eyes widen. _"Jack, it's already 8:30!"_

Jack lazily turned his head towards the alarm clock on the nightstand. _"Yeah, I know…"_

_"You're going to be late"_ Kate said with a worried voice, while a seriously concerned look appeared on her face.

Jack gave her a reassuring and sweet smile. _"It's okay, I'm not going. I was planning on spending the whole day with my girlfriend."_

Kate's lips turned into an adorable smile but it disappeared just as fast. _"Jack, I don't want you to stay home because of me…"_

Jack grabbed hold of Kate's hand and squeezed it gently. _"Kate it's okay. I want to stay home with you."_

Studying her face, Jack could tell that she didn't like the idea. He knew she'd disagree about him skipping classes, but considering the day before he didn't think she would be this hard to persuade.

Jack exhaled loudly. _"Okay, how about a compromise?" _Jack said with a devious look on his face. _"I drag myself out of bed right now and head over to the university and then I skip the afternoon lecture and come back early."_

Kate narrowed her eyes slightly and studied him, considering his proposition. _"Alright that's good enough I guess."_

_"Do you want me to call your father now, or when I get back?"_ Jack asked a bit hesitatively.

Biting her lip, Kate glanced at the clock one more time. _"Philadelphia has the same time-zone as New York, right?"_

_"Philadelphia is just like 100 miles away"_ Jack gave her a puzzled look, trying to determine if she was serious about not knowing what time zone Philadelphia was in.

Kate smirked at him. _"Sure, now is fine"_

_"Ok"_ Jack said back simply, as he leaned forward and gave her a quick kiss before slipping out of the bed into the living room.

Grabbing the phone from the coffee table, he realized he didn't actually know the number. As if she had heard his thought's Kate's voice was heard from the bedroom._ "His number is in the address book on my cell phone."_

Nodding to himself, Jack started pacing around in the living room until he found Kate's cell. Sitting down on the couch, he dialed the new found phone number to Kate's father.

After only one signal Jack heard a low male voice. _"Austin"_

Jack took a quick breath before he opened his mouth. _"Mr. Austin, this is Jack Shepard."_ The second he stopped talking he regretted not adding 'Kate's friend' or something like that to what he had said. He had met Sam Austin several times, but it wasn't for sure that the man would relate the name Jack Shepard to his daughter just like that.

_"Hello Jack, how nice to hear from you."_ The man sounded anything but enthusiastic to be talking to him.

Jack rolled his eyes slightly. Why try to act polite when you don't even bother to hide the irritated sound in your voice. Glad that Kate's father at least knew who he was, Jack forced himself from saying something malicious.

_"Mr. Austin I… I was… wondering if maybe we… we could talk… if you have a minute"_ Jack cursed himself for stuttering. He did think he would be this nervous about how the man was going to react. Thinking about he didn't know him that well at all. Back before Kate's parents split up, he had seen him various times at her house, but they had never really spoken to each other, just greetings and casual discussions, usually about school or his and Kate's plans for the day.

Something much like a sigh was heard in the phone. _"This is about Kate, isn't it?"_ Not bothering to wait for an answer the man continued. _"You know what Jack, now really isn't a good time."_

Jack nodded disappointedly to the empty room. _"Okay…"_ He said sadly in the phone, not believing how apathetic the man was acting towards his own daughter.

A few seconds of silence passed by until the older man cleared his throat._ "Jack?"_ Sam's voice was softer, but still sounding slightly annoyed.

_"Yeah?"_ Jack answer back, glancing up to notice Kate watching him in the doorway to the bedroom. She had put on one of his T-shirts and put her hair up in a messy pony-tail.

_"You're in NYC, is that correct?"_ Mr. Austin asked wearily in the phone.

_"Yes, sir"_

_"Alright, how's 2 o'clock?"_ The man continued, impatiently.

_"2 o'clock?"_ Jack questioned confused.

_"You wanted to talk didn't you? I'm not discussing my daughter's life over the phone from my office. So, does 2 o'clock work for you?"_ Sam's voice had turned a lot more offensive, like he was spit out each word.

_"Meet?"_ Jack mumbled, glancing back up at Kate to see what she thought about it. Not getting much from her blank expression, Jack sighed nervously into the phone. _"Yeah, 2 o'clock works."_

_

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please review _


	27. Family Secrets

_i dont know if you guys are still reading this, but well i thought id give writing it another shot. __let me know if you want me to continue this or not._

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**Chapter Twenty-Seven – Family Secrets**

Jack unlocked the door and dropped his bag on the floor the second he got inside the apartment. Kate stepped out of the bedroom with a pale look on her face, just as he turned around.

Closing the distance between them in less than a second, Jack gently placed his hand on her arm. "You okay?"

Kate nodded and gave him a weak smile that was meant to calm him down. It didn't help much since he could see in her eyes that something was off. He picked up something in her body language and eyes that he had never seen before. It didn't exactly have to be something bad but something told him it wasn't good.

"I'm fine" Kate answered, sounding a lot like a routine respond. He hated when she said that.

Cupping her face with one of his hands, Jack gazed right into her eyes. "Are you sure?"

Nodding slightly, Kate repeated her previous statement. "Yeah, I'm fine"

"Do you want me to cancel the meeting with your dad?" Jack asked cautiously, hoping that she would answer 'no'. If she did want him to stay home with her, he would though, no argument.

He was supposed to meet Mr. Austin in half an hour. Meaning that if the man was not already in New York, he was on his way there, and canceling the meeting now would probably not help the relationship between Kate and her father.

"No, I think I'm just going to get some rest." Kate said, as she smoothly slipped out of Jack's arms.

Wishing she would tell him what was bothering her, Jack let out sigh as he walked over to the couch. Had she changed her mind about him meeting up with her dad? He had a feeling she would have said something though. At least he felt like she was slightly more open about things that bothered her, but maybe she didn't want to put him in the position to be forced to cancel on her father.

Following her with his eyes, Jack glanced at his watch. He needed to leave fairly soon if he was going to make it to the diner on time. "You sure you don't want to come?"

"Positive. Plus he agreed to see you, not us. I don't think he actually knows I'm here in New York with you."

Jack smiled at her weakly as he rose from the couch and walked over to her and folded his arms around her. "I love you" He mumbled softly into her hair, as he gently caressed her back.

"I love you too." Kate whispered back with a loving tone in her voice. "You should go so that you're not late. Dad ain't a big fan of people being late. He's more of a 'be on time or don't bother showing up at all'-person.

Jack smirked at her comment even though that he knew that she was serious. "Well I guess I better leave then" With a gentle kiss, Jack grabbed his jacket and paced over to the front door.

Leaving the apartment, Jack drove hurriedly over to the small diner where he had agreed to meet Sam Austin. He walked in nervously, not sure if he hoped to see the man already sitting there or if he wanted to be the one sitting waiting when the older man showed up. Considering Kate's comment earlier in the apartment it was definitely leaning towards being the first one there.

Not having a chance to finish his thought, his eyes fell on Kate's father who sat at a small table in the back already sipping on a cup of coffee.

Damn.

Glancing at his watch, Jack let out a breath he wasn't even aware he had been holding. At least he wasn't late.

Walking up to the table, Jack politely nodded as he approached the man. "Hello Mr. Austin."

Sam casually glanced up from his coffee and offered the younger man a small nod back. "Hello Jack. Sit down."

Jack had barely sat down as the blonde waitress was standing at their table. Ordering coffee as well as a piece of blueberry pie, Jack smiled politely at the young girl who had clearly been flirting with him.

It didn't take many second until the young waitress was back at their table, placing a plate with pie in front of Jack as well as his coffee. Jack smiled at her once more as he noted her presence. "Thank you Michelle" He said politely after glancing at her nametag, making the young girl blush slightly.

Sam cleared his throat, making Jack turn his attention back to the man in an instant. "Before you say anything I want to make it clear that I do not like this, at all. The fact that Tom didn't even have the guts to meet me himself makes me dislike him even more, so no matter how much you're going to try to talk him up, it's no use."

Jack put down his coffee cup, with an almost disgusted look on his face. "Tom? This has nothing to do with Tom. I don't even like Tom…" Jack trailed off, making a face as the name left his lips. "Trust me I am not going to try to make him look better in any way. That is not why I asked you to meet me here. Kate actually asked me to call you."

A thoughtful look appeared on the older man's face. "Alright, why is that…" His voice was a bit softer, sounding like he was indeed curious why his daughter had wanted Jack to meet with him.

"Kate's not doing too good… She needs you…" Jack said softly, giving the man a devastated look.

Closing his eyes, Sam tilted his head slightly, his voice once more turning cold. "I guess that's Tom's problem and not mine nor yours."

Jack's eyes flashed with anger. He literally felt like punching the man. What the hell was his problem? "You're her father! If your daughter isn't feeling well, it's your goddamn problem!"

He could see that his word had affected him. Good, Jack thought as he continued to look directly at Sam with stern eyes.

"How would you even know how she's doing?" The man said, his expression once more turning scornful.

Jack looked perplexed for a second. Sam didn't know that Kate was in New York? Of course he didn't, how would the man have known?

He hadn't told him for sure, and he was pretty sure that Kate hadn't. He had kind of assumed that Jack's mother had said something about it, but apparently not.

By the look on Sam's face it didn't really seem like the man was expecting an answer to his question. It had been more of a questioning statement, telling Jack that the man wasn't too impressed with Jack's accusations.

"Kate is thinking about having an abortion" Jack said quietly after a few minutes of silence, not really sure why he was telling the man this. This had not really been part of what Kate had asked him to reveal to her father.

"Really?" Sam said with a surprised and a little softer voice. But the tone of his voice soon turned back to the mocking state it had been in earlier. "So he doesn't want the baby then?"

Jack's eyes flashed with rage. Would this man please just stop bring Tom up. "It's not Tom's baby…"

Austin gave him a disbelieving look, which soon turned into a smirk. "I see. So it is yours then…"

Jack took a deep breath. He felt like just telling the man to go to hell and just leave the diner. But here it goes…

"Kate was raped. That's why she's planning to do an abortion."

Sam Austin literally shrunk in his seat. The man's mouth was slightly open an expression of complete devastation appeared on his face.

"Oh my God" The man whispered breathlessly staring into space. "Who?" He then asked with furious eyes, his voice deep and harsh.

Jack tilted his head slightly, feeling rather intimidated by the older man. "I promised Kate that I wouldn't tell."

This seemed to make the man even more impatient. "Jack, who was it?!"

"I'm sorry, I can't tell you." Jack said quietly giving the man an apologizing look.

The man just stared at him for a moment then to Jacks surprise he nodded, with an understanding look across his face. Sam closed his eyes and lowered his head slightly, breathing a little heavier.

"Is she going to have the abortion?" Sam asked with an expression Jack couldn't quite read.

"I don't know" Jack said truthfully.

Silence fell over the two men. Jack suddenly seemed very interested in his slice of blueberry pie, slowly dissecting it with his fork.

"She's not my daughter…" The older man whispered almost inaudible, making Jack look up in confusion.

"What?" Jack asked perplexed. Had Kate's father just said that he 'wasn't' her father? That made no sense at all. No, he must have misheard.

"Kate's not my daughter" Sam repeated more strongly but with a sorrowful tone. "I was in Vietnam up until right before she was born."


End file.
